I hate this thread...but I cant stop reading it!!

OK, here's one for you.

One time I'd been drinking tequila all night and the next morning I was feeling a bit seedy, and my stomach was rumbling, so I thought maybe a glass of nice cold milk might settle things down.

I jumped in the shower straight afterwards and promptly threw up the glass of milk. That wasn't the gross part. The gross part was that it had curdled instantly in my stomach and what came out was a very well set tub of yoghurt which refused to find its own way down the plug hole, so I had to poke it down with my toes, which of course induced more vomiting. Before long I was up to my ankles in watery spew.

Now that's gross.

I found out that my wife Truely Loves me a few years ago ,
we had been stomping around in the woods ( fishing , or just tromping about ?? ) and when we got home i was takeing a shower , doing the routeen tick check , all was well untill i was washing my ,,,, well ,,,, my ass hole , there was a "cling-on" that wouldn't go away , and I couldn't see what was the problem , well,,,, she had to remove a tick from Down there for me .

I'll spare you guys the horrors of some other expenences from over seas : puke :

So what the hell hapens when I drink a White Russian?! (Or a Colorado Bulldog...)

Owww...now that would really hurt!

I think the vodka in a white russian mixes pretty well with milk. Tequila (along with all the lemon/lime that went with it) doesn't seem to.

Oh...the citrus. Like an "ice-box pie" where the lemon actually cooks the eggs (in the refrigerator).

I've never had eggs cooked with lemon juice, but I have had fish served that way.

I had acrylic nails put on yesterday (I have lady's hands now, please ask if you want a picture) and I keep forgetting.

I was in the bathroom having a rummage round in my nose (with a tissue I might add) and poked myself eye-wateringly hard on the soft flesh inside. 5 minutes later it's stopped bleeding but everything seems to smell of copper.

Careful to use appropriate implements if you find yourself working at the other end now that you've got those claws, SG.

Elspode! Are you accusing me of having.... fanny bogeys?

I bet what you identified as "copper" smell was actually iron, from the hemoglobin in your blood. I have had similar experiences during nosebleeds.

I was running some barbed wire for a new breeding section for our stock.
It was running behind because of bad weather and a late delivery, so I was working very long days. I cut my middle finger, just below the nail, very badly. A sane person would have gotten stitches, but the work had to be done. Needless to say, because of the exposure, gloves being taken on-&-off, it became infected pretty quickly.
But, I was pretty young and was working until I dropped and then just going back at it again.
Half way through the third day I decided to change my bandage and saw something I, at first, thought was puss or fat, move.
It was a maggot.
Of course I was going to pull him out with some tweezers.
I am not easily grossed-out, but this freaked me a bit.
One of the older Wahaken Indians that worked under me, through some motions had me wait and called over the foreman, who could speak English.
He told me how my new friend would only eat the "bad meat" and them drop out. He then asked if he could dress my wound.
He loosely dressed it, so my little friend could breath and we went back to work.
I was given instructions on how to wash, etc, and off we went.
My little friend did, indeed, only eat the dead flesh and excreted some kind of coagulant that sealed-up the rest. It stopped the infection and I ended-up with a much smaller scar than expected that finally grew-over.
He dropped-out after three days... I don't know when or where.
I have read a lot, since then, about the medicinal use of maggots.
After the first day's creepiness, seeing, and feeling, my little friend in there was very cool... for me.
Most people I tell don't see it that way.

Say hello to your leetle friend...?
;)

LOL... nice.