The Cellar - Just reaching out because life is very rough right now

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- - Just reaching out because life is very rough right now (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=35127)

Flint gets it. Be strong.

I'm still here for you, as we all are. Flint says good things. Be gentle with yourself and just do what you can without berating yourself for not doing more.
This will pass.

Sent by Magick. [emoji3314]

Quote:

Originally Posted by anonymous (Post 1056754)

My depression is really hammering me right now. Everything is overwhelming, even the tiniest things and I'm really a very capable person, so seeing that is depressing in itself. I'm making myself do them anyway, but it's not making me feel any better, more accomplished or more capable. And I'm barely touching the surface compared to what needs to be done. Still pressing on though. Just needed to say it to confirm it to myself.

Having battled with clinical depression for decades, I can relate. Barely touching the surface of what needs to be done is a popular refrain when I'm in it.

It's so fucking realistic, depression, it feels like it's always been dark, will always be dark, and that light never existed. Saying it will pass or it's just a storm in your brain may help, but it feels more like fake it 'til you make it. The realism of the depth precludes any chance at believing it will get better, but it actually will get better. Remember that.

It's like an existential flu - hunker down until it passes.

From one so-called capable person to another, you're not alone. I also know those words don't really help us capable people, because the only thing that matters is our internal opinion of how we're doing... but it's all I've got right now. Sometimes the stuff just has to wait.

Quote:

Seconded.

One thing I try to remind myself when i am in the midst of it, once I find myself ruminating in circles is that 'this is the wrong time to try to fix/sort out any major issues or lifestyle changes'. Itry to give myself permission to do the minimum and that be okay - it's like: okay, I am big and daft enough to deal with this stuff so why is it so hard? Because it just is right now. Right now in this moment, successfully getting dressed and having a wash is an achievement. This is what i am capable of right now and that is not a reflection of my overall capabilities.

I wouldn't beat myself up as a failure if I had a torn ligament and wasn't up to my usual level of walking. For some reason, just the way my brain works, every so often (very much on a cycle) I become temporarily less competent and able on basic shit and thats fine.

I try to remind myself of that every so often - I dont always listen to myself but sometimes it seems to help.

Quote:

Originally Posted by anonymous;

My depression is really hammering me right now. Everything is overwhelming, even the tiniest things and I'm really a very capable person, so seeing that is depressing in itself.

Yup same with me...... Its very sad :(

Im so sorry anonymous :(

OP: I do not know you and read a bit but I spent 10 miserable yrs in a clnical depression and it was a sluggish thyroid that was undetected by docs for 10 yrs...finally a SMART old time D.O. I saw knew right away and fixed me...that was in 2002... I have not been depressed in 18 yrs now. Live in chronic pain from OA but manage it and laugh when I can. j