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-   -   Women and Self Esteem (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=5978)

jaguar 06-18-2004 01:58 PM

Feel free to start it.

perth 06-18-2004 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Beestie
Doomed? Singledom beats the snot out of being with someone who doesn't have a handle on their insecurities. You should thank your lucky stars. And now that all your Cellar buds are looking out for you, your next gf will have to pass muster with us first. No serious dating until she signs up for an account here and gets a passing mark. And we're a tough crowd so don't be bringing any shrinkin' violets in here :)
That's a hell of a good idea, Beestie. When the time comes, I'll start looking for someone who can go rounds with the likes you guys. :)

Arliquin 06-18-2004 09:12 PM

Takes two, let's put the shoe on the other foot ...men are just as liable to succumb to self-esteem issues; especially in these times, when the face of society constantly changes by renegotiation of values. Manhood is constantly grappling with it's identity, function or even relevance. The problem lies not in this of itself - that is maybe how we grow, but in that it spills over to basic interraction with the opposite sex.

I'm trying to figure out women as much as the next guy. But I've seen the transforming effect of an insecure male partner on perfectly 'sound' females. The resulting ripple effect can only make sense if you see the stone that caused it.
You hit the nail on the head with the extent, OnyxCougar.

jaguar 06-19-2004 02:30 AM

mmm good point there.

Quote:

That's a hell of a good idea, Beestie. When the time comes, I'll start looking for someone who can go rounds with the likes you guys.
You sure you want to be dating someone like that? ;)

TG 06-19-2004 02:55 AM

Newbie here.

I'm normal. Never been in an abusive relationship. Dad didn't beat me up. Dad and Mom have been married since 1965 and are still going strong so no absenteeism.
I don't smoke or drink heavily or do drugs.

You may find that a lot of girls pretend to have low self esteem so that you will compliment them more often. I've seen that game a lot.

I was lucky enough that in all of my long term relationships (3), I had guys that told me I was beautiful on a daily basis. Self esteem hasn't ever really been an issue in my adult life.

I was however a very fat teenager and had some issues then.

jaguar 06-19-2004 03:15 AM

Quote:

I'm normal. Never been in an abusive relationship. Dad didn't beat me up. Dad and Mom have been married since 1965 and are still going strong so no absenteeism.
I don't smoke or drink heavily or do drugs.
Well you're just not going to fit in very well are you ;)

xoxoxoBruce 06-19-2004 04:00 AM

Welcome to the Cellar, TG.:) Pay no attention to Jag, he's just jealous of normal people. You'll make a handy benchmark for comparing,....Oh,...Cincy,....nevermind.:haha:

Crimson Ghost 06-19-2004 05:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by TG
Newbie here.

I'm normal. Never been in an abusive relationship. Dad didn't beat me up. Dad and Mom have been married since 1965 and are still going strong so no absenteeism.
I don't smoke or drink heavily or do drugs.

You may find that a lot of girls pretend to have low self esteem so that you will compliment them more often. I've seen that game a lot.

I was lucky enough that in all of my long term relationships (3), I had guys that told me I was beautiful on a daily basis. Self esteem hasn't ever really been an issue in my adult life.

I was however a very fat teenager and had some issues then.


Man, you had a boring life.

It wasn't until I joined the service that I found out that not everyones father beat the shit out of them on an almost daily basis. My old man used to beat me until I'd piss blood, and then beat me for pissing blood. Growing up, I thought that was normal. At least he stopped his shit when I choked his ass out in the kitchen. That afternoon, I had two choices: gut him like a deer, or leave. To this day, he stays outside arms reach of me. (How depressing can one guy get?)

And good for you, to find relationships that you feel good in. If only everyone could find one. I'm happily married over 10 years, but some of my friends had relationships that couldn't outlast milk.
I hope that your current one keeps you happy.

jaguar 06-19-2004 06:32 AM

Quote:

Pay no attention to Jag, he's just jealous of normal people.
I'm going to go slash my wrists horizontally listen to limp bizkit and write some angsty poetry now.
Nobody understands me.


I'm way too good at this.

Crimson Ghost 06-19-2004 07:21 AM

You know, jag, if you then start a grunge-rock band, you'll have it made. MTV will come a-calling.

jaguar 06-19-2004 07:25 AM

I really would rather slash my wrists than have 15 minutes on mtv.

Unless it was just hijacking the station for 15 minutes, that'd be damn good fun.

Crimson Ghost 06-19-2004 07:27 AM

Maybe then you could play some videos on that pitiful station. I was under ther assumption that MTV meant music television, not the crap they have on there now.

jaguar 06-19-2004 07:38 AM

I'd say just static would be a good diea but it'd be like if someone killed LiveJournal - you'd have to organize the mass graves across the country.


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