No wax.

not a friction burn.

you're both on the right track, it is a burn.

no sexin involved. this is definitely not a sexy fun time injury.

You were sitting on the ground cradling a hot muffler in your lap?

nope.

I injured myself just... walking around. Sitting also made it worse.

WTH was in your pocket that did that? A flesh flashlight?

warmer and warmer.

not a flesh flashlight, whatever the fuck that is.

Zippo lighter burn , you over filled the lighter and some fluid leaked out

Grav and Tulip have Lighter collections ,
and it wouldn't surprise me 1 bit if Bruce didn't have a few as well

I c wut u did thar ^^^

No more callers, please. We have a winner.

zippyt, are you just a super detective, or have you .. ahem.. learned this some other way? Your description was AWFULLY precise.

Fucking lighter. I love this lighter, don't get me wrong. Just a regular brass Zippo. But I must have OVERfilled it, as you say. And over the course of the morning... man.. my leg itches. No, it doesn't itch. It hurts. I don't remember getting stabbed there this morning.. fuck.. FUCK.

Well, it turns out that the stuff is sooo volatile, my pocket wasn't even wet. I guess there wasn't any liquid fluid around anymore. But the pocket was definitely contaminated and my goddamn leg was definitely injured. It took a couple days to lose its tenderness. dumbass.

Been there done that dude !!!
you have a chem burn , Alovera ( sunburn stuff ) will help

Oxycontin works well too

yeah.. been there done that too.

won't clog up the dwellar nsfw thread further with this dumb ol' text.

So it wasn't a fleshlight injury?

fleshlight injury risks:

constrictive cyanosis
cramps
rug burn
being late for work

If you're using naptha to clean it after and you get hurt, that's not an injury, that's God, guiding the hand of Darwin.

Don't forget the likelihood of getting punched when you ask the neighbor to hold it for you.

Nah, he burned himself with his morning coffee whilst reading the let's go karting thread when he saw the tutu pic! J/k!
Actually i guessed right too but was late on the draw. I too have a solid brass zippo. Used to collect them myself til i lost my collection due to you know what...