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I see... since you can't see that we are discussing an adult, who, as far as we know is sane, I'll try to dumb my language down for you now.
Sane adults are always responsible for their actions. People with Alzheimer's and toddlers are not allowed in public with full rights, similar to the insane. If you don't like how I communicate how about just don't take it personally. You're funny. This is about a parent's reaction to their kid and they are always responsible, unless they are a toddler, you cutie you, or has Alzheimer's, LOL!, for that. It is not the kid's fault if the parent loses it. If they are criminally insane, someone has dropped the ball. But, you just seem to want to argue, not really contribute to the thread. |
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I realize that trying to get you to change your posting habits is futile, but I figured I'd try with a post (or two.) |
We are in a thread about a sane adult, discussing with, presumably, sane adults... within that paradigm, my statement was accurate.
It is ridiculously cumbersome and silly to type out all possible exceptions to every statement within every discussion. As long as you are making statements within the paradigm of the discussion it is reasonable to retain the language of that paradigm. I am sure I could find examples of you doing the same thing. I would not because it is unreasonable to do so. |
So you are saying that whenever you write in absolute terms, you don't actually mean it?
When you title a thread "Alex Baldwin is a scumbag," you only mean that in the context of leaving this message, "Alex Baldwin made a scumbag move"? That's what Bruce and I have been saying, so I guess you agree with us. |
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I find that style maddening too. But rather that further flatten my head and my hand in frustration, I make an adjustment. Just as I would decode and reencode words spoken in a different language, I make a translation of what I hear into something I understand. The particular translation I make in situations like this is "blah blah blah absolute statement" "blah blah blah superlative" "blah blah blah assertion" becomes "... my opinion, and I'm highly agitated / excited / angry about it" Assertions as facts, especially absolutes without qualifiers, drive me nuts. I have a hard time communicating around and through such obstacles, and this method has helped me the most. I try to listen more with my heart and less with my ears. Communication, after all, is about the exchange of ideas, and only coincidentally about hearing the sounds. A tape recorder can capture the sounds. But that's very very different from listening. I reckon it goes both ways. There must be some out there that think I'm so wishy washy, a flipflopper that I can't take a position and mean it and keep it. Not so. I'm consistent, but I have extreme difficulty with careless use of superlatives and exaggerations and absolutes in serious conversation. |
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No, an adult who makes the conscious choice to speak to their child like that is a scumbag. I am making that as an absolute statement. Especially one who does not own it afterward and simply say "I fucked-up, I'm sorry"... scumbag... bottom of the bag. Absolutely. |
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So the people arguing for Alec here feel that what he said is justifiable, acceptable, is not abusive, and he should suffer no consequences for his behavior, is that correct?
Is this a result of the common, yet erroneous, opinion that abuse is only physical? That verbal assult does not count? How about the people who say that slapping with an open hand is not hitting? Or forcing your wife to have sex is not rape because she is your property? You all agree? And further, that his anger is not his responsibility, but his daughter's or even his daughter's mother's fault? See, I believe in self-accountabililty. We are each responsible for our actions as well as our reactions to external forces. We all have a choice in what we do and say. Alec could have chosen a non-abusive, assertive manner to discuss his disappointment and hurt with his daughter. Even if he 'lost' it and said things he shouldn't have, he could have been mature and emotionally healthy enough to apologise (without slinging blame and excuses around). But he didn't. Stormie |
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Honestly, this type of attitude astounds me. Personally, I don't give two shits about Alec, Kim or their daughter. I haven't looked for a a single article about them since the media played the tape the first time. What I care about is the ignorance that attempts to minimize or excuse verbal and emotional abuse. It is appalling that so many people think that talking to another person, particularly a child, in this manner is not a big deal. Society, in general, are enablers of abusers. Their ignorance and silence on the issue allows it to perpetuate in darkness, further isolating its victims and destroying even more lives, hearts, futures, families, and souls - often in combination with financial health, careers, and physical bodies, not to mention children and their lives and futures, as they learn the behavior themselves by example. So lets all mind our own business and ignore the future generation of abusers and abuse victims that today's domestic terrorists are raising. I just wish people DID understand how wrong this is and cared enough NOT to subject their own families to similar. But sadly, that is not the case. Stormie |
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