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-   -   E-mail Idiots on Parade (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=1718)

elSicomoro 11-18-2002 08:08 PM

Nic, you and I should developed the Canadian or American version of this letter. :)

elSicomoro 06-27-2003 05:18 PM

How nice...a piece of spam about an anti-spam tool.

Description:

The powerful, effective and intelligent anti-spam tool.
It automatically cleans spam messages out of your mailbox before you receive or read them.

Features:

* Automatically Blocking Spam
Spam Remedy automatically checks your mail boxes and filters unwanted, dangerous, or offensive mail messages to save your time from manually detecting and organizing mail messages.
* Effectively Spam Detecting
A complex Aritificial Intelligence algorithm has been used in Spam Remedy product to detecting legitimate mail messages and spam messages,the technique has more precision than other filter-based and keyword-based anti-spam technologies.
* Be Sure You Get Your Right Mail Messages
Spam Remedy doesn't confirm a spam message by a single keyword in mail content. It examines the entire message - source, headers and mail content to confirm whether it is a spam message.
* Supports Multiple Email Types and Almost All Email Clients
Spam Remedy supports POP3, Hotmail/MSN, IMAP4 and MAPI email accounts,Directly works with almost all email clients(Outlook Express, Becky Mail,Foxmail,Outlook, The bat!, Eudora etc.), espacially includes support for web-based Hotmail/MSN email clients. Nothing you need to change to your email clients!
* Easy to use - You don't need to set any complex filter rules, just add your email accounts to Spam Remedy and then it works.
* Friends List and Rejecting List
With Friends List and Rejecting List,you have the chance to decide who are never blocked or directly treat their mail messages as spam.
* Keep your inbox clean
Spam Remedy places all intercepted spam messages to its interval mail database so that your inbox remains uncluttered and free of spam.If for some reason a legitimate email is flagged as spam, you can easily recover in multiple ways.

DOWNLOAD NOW!

wolf 06-28-2003 12:54 AM

Metaspam. It was inevitable.

Elspode 06-28-2003 01:36 AM

99% (this is no exaggeration, I swear) of the spam I receive is somehow penis related.

It is either for Viagra online, an herbal remedy better than Viagra, various penis enlargement devices, etc.

Why don't I get a barrage of boob englargement advertisements? Presumably, because there is no online purchasing method for surgical procedures, but possibly because women are just not quite as sensitive about their protruberances as men are about their willies.

Either way, it is pathetic. I keep waiting for an email from Nigeria telling me that I have been chosen to assist in the transportation of 10 gazillion hits of Viagra to my personal account.

wolf 06-28-2003 08:30 PM

I too receive multitudes of spam enticing me to naturally increase my penis length and none to enhance my hooters (The scariest one so far was the ad for a "barnyard grannies" porn site). I often wonder about this ... as well as what I did/surfed to that got me onto these lists.

I do know that visits to AOHell chatrooms are the kiss of death with respect to spam generation, and thus have a screen name that I use for my visits to Gun Control Chat, but the account name that I get the majority of the spam on has spent nary a second in a chat room ...

xoxoxoBruce 06-28-2003 08:48 PM

I don't get much spam but I do get porn junk mail and 40% of it is for gay porn. Must have been the rubber Genoa salami and the bottle of anal-eze. What pisses me off is all the money these marketing types make when the mailing lists are so far wrong.

russotto 06-30-2003 10:04 AM

You must be on the wrong mailing lists. Plenty of breast-enlargement cream scams end up in my junk box. Along with penis enhancement (they never offer to pick up the bill for the custom-tailored jeans their products would require, so I'll pass), industrial parts from china, and incomprehensible junk.

warch 06-30-2003 05:10 PM

For some reason I have been heavily targeted by entities using hotmail accounts as being in the market to purchase a hot, young, obedient, Russian girlfriend. I mean...I guess she could help clean...

wolf 07-01-2003 02:02 AM

I actually know someone who purchased a Russian Mail Order Bride and got a bonus of her offspring (the number and gender I don't immediately recall. There's at least one adolescent male child).

My money's on she kills him after the green card becomes irrevocable.

I'll let you know.

(the better money may actually be on she steals all his stuff and takes off with his life savings leaving him a broken and bitter man, but I'm staying with my original choice).

Whit 07-01-2003 09:02 AM

     On the subject of penis enlargement ads, I got one the other day that said it could increase the length of my penis up to five inches. Now, I'm willing to admit upfront that I'm not exactly pornstar material, but five more inches??? I think I could seriously hurt a (non-pornstar) lady with that much extra. I mean christ, that would bring the average male up to around 11 inches. Most of the women I know become really nervous at that prospect.

dave 07-01-2003 09:05 AM

My reading suggests that 9 inches is all that will fit in a woman, and my experience tells me that that's about right.

dave 07-01-2003 09:08 AM

Also...

Whit - I got into the business by being <b>reliable</b>. Size won't get you anywhere if you shoot after a minute. But size sure as hell doesn't hurt. At least not in an employment way. The woman, on the other hand...

Whit 07-01-2003 09:16 AM

&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; I'd read similiar numbers on what the average woman could handle. As I couldn't place where I'd read it or back up that info I decided to leave it out.
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;So'kay Dave, I know I don't have to be hung like John Holmes. After all, I've got a nine inch tongue and can breath through my ears. :blush:

Griff 07-17-2003 08:57 PM

Sir,

I am Mr VICTOR BRIGHTON, a personal assistant to the Incarcerated
former Chief of Nigerian Army Staff, LT. Gen. Ishaya Bamaiyi. Due to
the
close
relationship between us, I was mandated by Ishaya to privily handle
and execute all his Personal financial matters, so that nothing will
be
traced to
him by the present democratic government that is out to recover
monies made
by
him while in office.

Presently, he has $52.7 million in coded form with a Security and
Deposit Company, known to him and I alone. He is presently in dire
need of money to pay his Attorneys, hence has instructed me to source
for
a
reliable and sympathetic person to help receive the fund. We have
agreed
to
pay
20% for assisting, while 5% will Be set aside for expenses.

If you are interested in assisting, e-mail me immediately so that I
can link you up with the Securities Company to release the money to
you on
our
Behalf for further investment.

Regards
VICTOR


A golden oldey complete with wierd layout.

elSicomoro 07-17-2003 09:18 PM

I think the saddest part of that whole scam is that it's been going on for so long...and people STILL fall for it.


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