Well on one hand, angry idealism is such a masculine quality. But a five-year grudge over one insensitive comment is something only a chick would do.





~ i kid the ibster ~

Right. Because people's minds can be changed, and bigotry doesn't have to be permanent. As was my point.

Merc would never change his views.

and as far as holding a grudge for five years....well, yes, I have. When i was feeling low and he suggested I commit suicide-that rather clinched it for me. Yes, let's all sing of our hail fellow Merc who was mean, cruel, bullying person. He would NEVER change his views or let the light of reason slap him across his face.

Let's lament his going.


so long, merc! don't let the door hit ya in the ass as you leave!

you're all romancing him. He was a total mean, hateful, bigoted asswipe. all this going on about his wonderfulness and ability to engage as a human-ha~! you are all far, FAR too PC. He wouldn't cross the street to shit on most of you. ESp. the like of you liberals-which is everyone but himself and a few select others. I started a thread on Paula Deen once for christsakes and he couldn't keep his bigoted mouth shut even about THAT.

Le Douche Bag-Farewell. I will NOT miss you.

I DID see this. the above is in reply.

It's a comment that is beneath you, Toad.

At the risk of losing all my sexiness points in one fell swoop, I thought UT's crack was kind of funny.

I reprimanded him for that too, and yet on the other hand if you want to judge people with the most optimism about who they are:

So. You have nearly 4 years on this grudge. Feel free, you're welcome to it, but I can't see living life that way. Too much wasted energy. You found something to hate him for, perhaps because you wanted to with his outrageous points of view. But when you hate, who do you hurt the most? Hate hurts you. Hate hurts you!

If you want to defeat your enemy SING HIS SONG

UT, When it happens once, it's an accident or mistake.
When it is repeated time and again... it's reputation.

Hmm.

In my opinion, intolerance of intolerance is still intolerance. Tolerance does not involve neutrality, it, by it's very definition, requires that you disagree with whom/whatever you are tolerating. Also, tolerating a person and/or idea is much different from tolerating behavior. Disagreeing with someone's opinion is not a personal indictment of their character.

I didn't care for many of Merc's political/social stances, but liked a lot of other facets of him - his family, work ethic, kids, etc.

And yes, I quite enjoy interacting with people of opposing views, as long as it doesn't get personally aggressive. I like the growth that comes from trying to understand where people I disagree with are coming from. And if I find someone is behaving in a way that I will not tolerate, instead of trying to change THEM, I just remove myself from the interaction.

I was prepared to offer the undertaker a large pile of cash. :o
So you would rather the Cellar be a cuddlefest, than hear/know what a very large segment of the population thinks?
Me too. Well, no points at risk, but the funny.

Not up to a coherent contribution today, but I like the way Stormie put this. And the quote from UT (Merc saying he would never have said what he did if he'd known the background) - doesn't make it okay for Merc to have said that, but illustrates the point about separating words from person.

Merc knows where he stands with many of the posters here. And he knows the kind of push back he will get if he were to come back without moderating his aggresively insulting posting style. Maybe Glatts pm to him finally made him realize that he went too far and doesnt really have the support here that he thought he had. Not too many people will tolerate repeatedly dickish behavior.

Advice to Merc: Send more Dwellers digital cameras. Put breathalyzer on computer. Wait 24 hours before hitting "send."

[Trilby impersonation] :crone: [/Trilby impersonation]

[Ibby impersonation] :rolleyes: [/Ibby impersonation]

[Ibby @ 50 impersonation] :crone: [/Ibby @ 50 impersonation]

fify

:D

I seriously doubt merc's claim of "not knowing" about me and my condition - he certainly made enough cracks about me being 'mentally unstable' and 'are you taking your meds?' BEFORE the 'go ahead and take all your sleeping pills at once' comment. Whenever he got caught he'd get this What? ME? kind of attitude. And his claim that I am somehow 'broken'-? Like a defective toy? that was backhanded too. see thru the snake's misty talk and you will see the snake behind the bullshit. However, you are right, Tony, I must forgive him if I am to be fully functioning and happy. Truth be told those of you who are sorry he is gone, I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hope you find another person to spar with as it seems so much fun for you to take on people=== though your discourse with merc was far from fairsided-he was so up in his own shit he could not listen to you with your reasonableness, etc. He could only yell and call names and when he truly hurt someone look astonished and cry "I never KNEW!!!!!" And to say I am broken because I"m on meds? isn't that to say everyone on psych meds is 'broken'---? and he knew it. He's simply a liar.



No, I don't want a cuddlefest. I've had my own fights on here. I've learned to tolerate what can't be cured-I don't hit people over the head----anymore. it does no good for one thing. It changes exactly NOTHING. you change people by civil argument and backing facts. IF that person is willing to listen instead of simply attack. Merc was all about the attack. Oh, sure, once in a while he'd throw a bone of humanity out there in a recipe thread or something else but mostly it was "i'm white, I'm rich, i'm better than you, you're broken and run to the doctor whenever anything is wrong you crybaby....etc etc" that last was a comment he made when I was talking about going to the doc for something or other. Yeah, I have a lot to not like about him. I, though, enjoy his gone-ment. His hatred. His fear. His entitlement because he's white and rich. Oh, yes, he let us alllllll know how wealthy he was - kind of like that rkzenrage guy letting us allllll know how very intelligent he was. In my neighborhood if you gotta say it you can't play it.

I'm so happy for those of you who were lucky enough to be knighted presents by this asshole. He's happy to buy the lot of you and would probably come back here just to claim he could.

I didn't hate him for ONE thing he said, I hated him for EVERYthing he said. He treats women like shit; is a know-it-all ("people who go to Paula Deen's restaurant are ignorant she sucks, blah blah blah) look: I can't stand the guy. I"m allowed to hate him. that doesn't mean I've wasted anymore time than it took to write this thread-which was five pages long when I voiced my opinion--to waste energy on him.

Trilby, if Merc had posted to me what he posted to you (and what he posted to Ibs, for that matter), I wouldn't forget it, either - probably not after 5 years or 10 years or even 20. That was incredibly cruel and there was no excuse for it. NONE!

In the end, Merc could dish it out but he couldn't take it. He got upset and left because his posts didn't inspire a universal outpouring of love? Poor baby. Too bad.

Let me clarify a little. I regret the loss of a different point of view. I have no regret what-so-ever for the absence of posts that were written in the spirit of one of the meanest trolls around. He showed you his very worst side. He showed me that he could be better than that.

Maybe that's what it comes down to. Merc was capable of being human, but all too often, he chose to be a miscreant instead. In some ways, that's worse then being uniformly "evil." Unlike some, Merc had the ability to rise above. All too often, he chose not to.