Sometimes, just standing still IS moving on. You don't have to do anything but feel it and love yourself no matter what. I can make you one promise, though: you will NOT feel like this forever.
:grouphug:

What she said. In my experience, the way out of your situation is to say "I'm hurting more now than I ever have before - but I WILL get over it with time". Feel it, and let it go.

DidI mention that we, on top of everything else, work together and I have to see her everyday? I still can't believe I did this! I am so freakin pissed at myself. Oh well....

When you see her just remember....you've had that. ;)

Thanks Bruce that makes me feel so much better! I was a total mess yesterday so did something I NEVER do. Got a bottle of Southern Comfort, drank it and passed out around 8:00. Sleep rules. Hangovers suck! Now I really feel like shit emotionally and physically.

I'm going to have to agree with UT, here, yesman. Just start treating her like crap, and you won't be able to run her off.

She isn't your direct subordinate at work, I hope?

No, I'm one of several sales Reps and she's the Administrative Assistant. She really does all the stuff that the bossman needs her to do. Not really parallel to me either though. I must say that if I gotta "treat someone like shit" to be with me then why would I want to be with a shitty person anyway? I just need her to realize this guy is a jerk and move on ---- hopefully with me.

Be sure next time you bang, err make love with her, you swipe her t shirt. That way you can say to yourself:
"Been there, done that, have her t-shirt."

:rimshot:

"Treating her like shit" is a message that she can't take you for granted. That she doesn't have you on the trophy shelf. It's rejection, and people that play that game see it as a defeat.
Right now she's batting .500 which is big leagues. Reject her and she's back to .000, which won't even cut it in the sand-lots. In order to get back to .500 she has to make a choice or have more at-bats. Either way it'll be settled. :smack:

sometimes you can't choose whom u want to love...coz it's the heart that decides. although, i dont disregard that some poeple love someone because there's a WANT factor!

my grandma (stepgrandma actually) married my grandpa, who is 40 years her senior, because she wanted to have a good life...and i tell you, she really took good care of him til his last breath...and she never remarries again...

You know cinderella, that’s cool.
Whenever I hear of a situation like this, then the elder spouse dies and the children attack the surviving spouse, it burns my ass.
Grandpa was 40 years her senior, he knew she would probably survive him by a fair amount. So what? They obviously had a deal…it was between them….it was for their mutual benefit. Everyone else should butt the fuck out!
You seem to have the right attitude...good for you. :thumb:

Advice please
 

I am currently seperated from my wife, we are talking about reconnecting but have not commitedto each other again. I have found myself getting involved with a girl 11 years my junior. She seems to be everything I want in a lover (but we have not had any sexual contact). I am at a crossroaads now, weather to try a new relationship with a girl who in the long run may not be able to communicate with me and have almost no common ground with, or my wife with whom I have allready tryied and failed once. The new girl is much more beautiful (not because of the age) and seems to be much more willing to try to make me happy. WHAT DO I DO :question: any advice is greatly appreciated

have you failed on both relationship levels, sexual and personal, with your wife? If so, I say try with the girl.

greatkaven, what have you got to lose? :)

What Bruce said. You have nothing to lose and probably a lot to gain.