Sorry man. I hope he didn't mess up his families life insurance. I'm watching my Dad's mind go in slow motion, neither way looks very attractive.

The insurance settlement is pending as of now, but his Sister told me yesterday that it was likely that the family would still recieve the benefits due to dementia. We're sure he knew what he was doing, because, even though he was really depressed he was still able to think clearly. Hopefully the insurance execs don't know that.
I had a BIL who drank a snoot full of vodka and took a couple handfulls of nerve pills on a Christmas day. They were getting divorced and he was truly depressed. It resulted in his death. The autopsy says he had choked to death on his own vomit. The insurance company paid the full benefit. I know he killed himself, but obviously they didn't.
Thanks for your thoughts, my friends. Funeral is today. I will sing. Not really looking forward to it. At least it's not a military burial.

Cap'n, I'm sure the insurance company knew, they just paid anyway.

:hug: for you and his family. wish we were there to hear you sing - I'm sure he'll appreciate it from where he's sitting.

Capn, how awful. So sorry. *hugs* It's always hard to lose a friend. Must be horrendous for the family. To think you still have time for goodbyes and then this. Musthave been a tough decision for him to make.


@ Moonfreckle: well, honey, someone has to be next to the psycho:P I seem to recall Bri having a similar problem with a psycho neighbour from hell.

Ali - ignore the MIL. She sounds about as receptive to new ideas as my Mum and her ilk.
You'll know in time whether there is good research behind that idea, and in the mean time you are not suggesting anything radical as a counter-measure.

Cap'n I'm sorry. Hard to deal with when someone takes themself off without warning, and I get that you feel for his family.

Moonfreckle - argh!
Crazy witch. Hope she hurts herself next time.

Dennis is scratching his own throat up for some reason... he's all raw and bloody. Vet can't see him till 5.

Awww. Poor little bugger. Hope he feels better soon.

MIL is a right royal cow, but I hold all the power. If I don't take Max over to see her, she wont see him. I'm in no rush to hurry back at this stage, and it's not because I'm being vindictive. I just need to get my head together before I bother going again or else I might say something I'll regret later. In the mean time, I'll just keep telling Daryl what a cow she is, and he'll keep agreeing and telling me not to bother going back in a hurry.

I've emailed a couple of experts in the area and they've suggested that there's nothing firm out there just at the moment, and that I shouldn't worry too much at this stage. In the mean time I'll just wait for his 'head holders' to show up and see how they help.

Thanks for your thoughts SG. :)

Capn, I'm sorry about your friend. Sometimes the medical profession can be very compassionate about declaring a cause of death in cases where it's quite clear the deceased had a hand in it themselves. I hope all goes as hoped for the family. At least they'll have something to finalise his estate with then.

Moonfreckle...all I can say is, I feel your pain. ;)

With the life insurance Jim got recently, he' allowed to kill himself after either 3 or 5 years (I forget). Apparently it isn't always an automatic disqualification, like on TV...

I find it somewhat disturbing that you have this information ready to hand...

How long until you can kill him?

Anytime now.

It's nice to know how much your husband is worth alive or dead at all times. ;)

LOL (yes, actually!)

Friends my ass.

True friends will never desert you. Just an aside...carry on.

I just got something in the mail that really upsets me.

When my mom died, I inherited some stuff from her. Minivan, condo, and two seriously ugly-ass building lots in Cape Coral, Florida. I know they are ugly. I've seen them. I guess some people would like them, but they're awful, tiny, weedy, sandy things across the street from a man-made canal. I don't know why my parents bought them - investment of course, and perhaps at one time they intended to build and live there. Tell you what, it was one of those deals where you get a free couple nights in a hotel if you see a sales pitch, and these are not the actual lots they bought; there was a whole big scandal about it back in the 70s. I don't know what they're worth; not as much as they used to be worth now that the housing market in FL stinks. She used to get offers in the mail for $40K or more, but now they've stopped. So I figured I'd hang on to them for a while hoping the market would improve - don't even know if anyone would buy them now.

Now, the mail. The city of Cape Coral has decided to run water lines and of course us lucky lot owners have to pay for it. It's about $5,000 if I pay before Oct. 23. After that, it'll be $17,000.

I dunno about you, but I sure don't have an extra $5K laying around. Heck, I'm not even sure how I'm gonna come up with the $1K in taxes for the condo due at the end of July.

So I thought - well, this would be a good time to at least put the lots on the market and see what happens. But I can't even do that 'cause they've not been probated yet; they are not in my name. I have to pay MORE money to a FL attorney to get to where I could even sell the lots if I wanted to. No idea what that would cost. I guess I ought to find out.

This is just one of my periodical FREAKOUTS about money. I do this every now and then.

Did I mention that we just bought a water softener and a new air conditioner? And hubby wants to buy a new travel trailer plus of course a tow vehicle for it? OK, I kind of want one too -- we love "camping" and the kids aren't gettin' any younger y'know. (It's not really camping if you have a/c, a queen-size bed and a microwave, is it? :))

I'm the one that makes sure all the bills get paid on time. It's not exactly a low-stress job these days.

So offer a coulpe free nights in the camper to whoever buys the lots.......

Juniper, I think you will be surprised to find out those little lots are worth a hell of a lot more than you think, even in this depressed market. You need to have them appraised. If you can sell them off you could probably buy all those things you want.

Not upset per se, more like melancholy.

I really miss the people at my old job. They were so much fun. We used to laugh and laugh, sometimes so hard we cried.

Here and now, erm...not so much.

Hmmm, blue, I feel your pain. Mine isn't about the cow orkers so much, though of course I had forded some deeper relationships at my old job. We laugh here. I just miss feeling like I was in charge of my job and I owned my job and if good things happened it was my doing and if bad things happened it was my fault.

Here, sometimes, I feel like I'm just starting out at the MaCDonalDs.

Yah, I know what you mean--things are just kind of happening, and you have no control or over them, or much input into the process. It can be very unsettling.

Juni - you could easily borrow the money using the lots as collateral. As Merc advises, get an appraisal (which will happen anyway if you take out a loan against them).

Call a real estate attorney in the area and get some advice about the water assessment. I didn't know you could assess utility infrastructure costs against land owners unless it was in an association. Something seems funny about that. Especially the $5k now or $17k later. Honestly, it sounds like a scam.

Quite common for the local town/county government (or one of their insidious "authorities") to decide you need water, sewer or sidewalks, and you have to foot the bill. It's common for it to be cheaper for those required to pony up the money now, as opposed to those that join in later, or make them wait until the property is sold and the lean satisfied.

Phone and internet still out at the dar household. grumble grumble

My boy is wounded.
I'm not worried about it marring his beauty - he's not a showcat and I'd love him one-eyed and battleworn.

But it's the first time he's been hurt.
And (to a tiny, weeny degree) I feel like a parent whose child takes the skin off their knee while cycling or skating. I'm hurt that he's hurt and I grieve that he will always know that the world is painful from now on.

Stop smirking behind your hands, you owners of cat-brawlers.
It might look like strawberry jam in the photo, but this is a significant gouge for the tiny Diz cat. It wouldn't have taken much more for it to come through the other side - you can see right through it.

I don't know if it's another cat or if the boy squeezed into too small a space and did a coyote. All I know is he is NOT going out of my sight outside again. Nope, no way. He's just not bred to be robust enough for it.

I'm bathing it in salt water. And pretending to lick it clean while doing so (making licky noises by his ear as I swipe it). Well it works when cleaning his ear with a pokey stick, now Dylan of blessed memory is not here to do it for him.

Tell him ....

"Suck it up ya Nancy!"

I have a few outdoor cats and they strut around a lot like they are the kings of the neighborhood. Occasionally one of them will get a whooping and come back with a good gouge or three. They tend to stick close to the house for a bit, heal up, and then get back to their routine.

He'll be just fine catmom - just don't embarrass him in front of the other cats.

An A/C unit at the lodge had a compressor go out. Today's estimate was 5,200 bucks. Fuck.

Some SHIT STICK stole my brand new gas grill last nite. I only used it 3 fucking times. SHIT!!!!!!!

Ugghh!!! That totally sucks Fargon. sorry to hear that.
Where was it? How? When?? Were you away?

Ugggg... that just happened at our house a few weeks ago. We opted for the replacement AC at about $2500. And then after install they find another problem for the internal bit (up in the attic) another cool $2500. That hurt the bank account a bit.

I hate that happened to you. Thieves piss me off.

Keep your eye out, Fargon, they might be local and just using it for themselves. That sucks so badly. Gits. May their genitals get trapped in the grill just as it reaches temperature and their ice maker be out of order. And may they get a fake bill when they sell it on but not realize until they try to use it to pay their parking fine.

IT was in my back yard, he picked it up and put it in his pick up, and I was sleeping .
Update: The grill came back about an hour ago, he borrowed it now it has a chain and big pad lock on it.

Who "borrowed" it? and why would they do that without asking?

I hate folks who "borrow" things. The only thing in my yard the neighbors are free to borrow is the poison ivy. :mad2:

This is an industrial unit. It's 5200 just to replace the compressor. Getting another price in am from another co.....
I don't think the estimates will vary widely.:mad:

Well at least "we" are finally doing what we should have done in 2002 and 2003 instead of running off to Iraq. I hope it isn't too late.

Upsetting is a strong word - disappointed and deflated works better.

I finally got a response to my enquiry regarding a refund of National Insurance for last year.
My calculations suggested it could be as much as £200, although no guidelines are given and I certainly haven't been able to find anything which satisfactorily explains how it is calculated, so I was wary of assuming too much.

Just as well - I am not due any refund apparently.

This is more about mood than any real practical issues. Although I've been impatient for a response, at least it kept the hope of a payoff alive - like not checking your lottery ticket until you get back to work on Monday morning. This has squashed that hope and I obviously hadn't proected myself well for this eventuality because I'm gutted.

Apart from a necklace I had my eye on, or maybe a dress - I kept changing my mind - the money was going to be saved against future needs. Come the Autoumn this might have meant my trip to Amsterdam, or money towards moving out. So it's not like it was an immediate need, a bill to be paid, money owed or anything like that. So I'm lucky in that way.

There's still a possibility I will receive an Income Tax refund, but I was using the same logic when I applied for that, so sadly it is far less likely, having received this response.

I'll just mourn the loss of my little fortune quietly this weekend and pick up where I left off Monday. After all, I'm back on a stricter diet from then, so it all fits in a with a more Spartan lifestyle anyway.

I'm quite bemused that you would expect a refund fom National Insurance -I've never heard of that happening. But income tax, quite likely if you stopped earning partway through the year and whilst still below the threshhold.

Well, I looked at an online calculator, and had I earned the same amount over 12 months, I would have paid approx £200 less. Then I googled National Insurance Refund and it gave an address for queries if you thought you had paid too much.

Damn internets. Giving out information to overly-emotional people!

Am all recovered now. Without the help of alcohol I am pleased to say - which would have meant I was still feeling awful even today.

Though I'm getting a little tired of these dreams.
Dream after dream of hiding things n my bed and worriying about being discovered. Alcohol is a typical one, but the other morning it was dead bodies. I had three in the bed with me and I was torn between revulsion and comfort.

And this morning I dreamed I lost all my teeth - which I know is a common dream for some people, but a new hell for me. AND I was in terrible conflict with an ex work colleague at the same time, and I knew I would lose my job at the next review meeting, but I just couldn't stir myself to do anything about it.

I wake up and bounce merrily out of bed these days.... right.

Lets see... over $200 in food, $220 in booze, 2 days of cleaning and prep... and 3 people bothered to show for my hubby's birthday party. That leaves 8 for sures and 6 maybes un-accounted for that did not bother even calling to cancel. Bah

Now that would PISS me off! Are you going to say anything to those who said they'd be there and didn't show at least?

meh... not worth it. These people knew months ago... one couple just told me they knew there was a party, but was not sure they were invited, so didn't come. Yet I specifically said it was an open house from 5pm until 3am and even stopping by for 15 mins would be cool. Another couple went to the cabin (only 45 mins away)and another couple has been MIA for about a week.. perhaps on holidays. Hubby wasn't surprised, and we had a good time anyway.... it was just disappointing.

So we have AAA rib eye steaks for dinner tonight, freeze the chicken wings, I will freeze the seafood stuffed mushroom caps. I didn't even take the shrimp out of the freezer last night anyway, nor did I cook the veggies I planned to grill.
The booze doesn't go bad, so no worries there. Instead of making up the 3 level cupcake tree into a full shooter tree, we only poured the ones we drank. It did not give the look I wanted, but it was easier. I made 5 of each: (I used clear beer bottles. I have a capper, so they were sealed and put into an ice bucket) -vodka, soda water and orange juice, - vodka, pineapple juice, orange juice and soda water and, - malibu rum, soda water and orange juice spritzers.
The ones not drank will most likely go today, on my hubby's actual birthday :)

That's the spirit. Celebrate being together along with the B-day. The important thing is that you have and care for each other. I would give anything to be able to have a two person party with my wife. Anything.
Have a great day! And tell him we said HAPPY BIRTHDAY!:celebrat::hugnkiss:

As long as he and you had a good time that's all that really matters. Sounds to me like the people who didn't show up were the losers. If I weren't so far away, I'd have been very happy to come for a yummy and fun evening like yours. :) Of course I wasn't invited, but well, I guess there's nothing wrong with a little bit of gate crashing every now and then is there? lol

LOL gate crashing makes a party!!! There is a luau on Sat here, for my birthday, come on over.... I am doing a stuffed turkey on the BBQ, having stuffed mushrooms, mini stuffed peppers, grilled veggie salad, garlic and brie dip, spicy shrimp, long rice noodles and homemade vanilla ice cream with raspberries soaked in raspberry vodka for 2 weeks (soaked then put in the freezer) and then anything everyone (if anyone shows) brings. :)

I'd love to come, but I don't think my plane will get me there in time. ;)

btw, I think you should spend some time in the food and drink forum. You seem to be quite into all that gastronomical stuff. :)

Take out the shrimp, let it sit in the sun a couple days, then mail it to the noshows. ;)

I wish just one, just one mudder-plucking freaking fracking gawddam thing would work right today.

Anything. Just one thing. :mad:

Fuck it.

can you see your new car from where you're sitting?

No.

I want to get in it and drive to Canada or somewhere.

OH, here's a joke:

Q: What sucks worse, men, or work?
A: They both suck equally.

Ain't it a knee-slapper?

edit: I didn't mean YOU men. Sorry...weekend from hell and nothing is going right today. :blush:

At least you can still joke around. Can't be all bad.

Oh, was just having a day. It started with the bag I carried a huge pile of paperwork in (to work on over the weekend...yeah, right) broke and paperwork went all over the parking lot at work this morning. Then it was just a couple major projects for which nothing was working...one of them a huge deal that needs to be complete soon and the site has been on the blitz for a while. I talked to my rep at Ed and it's happening to everyone. Must be a big deal, those sites are usually pretty quick.

The man joke was a result of me, one more time, trying to accomplish what I tried to accomplish many times before. Not a good weekend for me.

So, I just wanted something to go right. ;)

Don't mean to complain, when I have no right to, just venting.

my buddy's kid was in a bad car accident on Wednesday.

How is s/he doing?

How's he doing, Jim?

coma :(