Sick of Being Fat
 

Hi im a 17 year old guy and im 394lbs. I really need to lose weight. Im tired of not being able to do things and beig made fun of.

Please help

Please tell me everything you have eaten in the last 48 hours. Be as precise as possible.

You just took the first step... it is hard, but you can do this.
Two BIG things. This is not going to be easy... this is a life decision, so if you don't want to change who you are, you are not ready.
Two... you are going to make mistakes, when you do, you have not failed. It was just something that happened at that moment and you will have to work that much harder.

However, if you ever plan for a mistake.... if you ever excuse a mistake, you are out of it and it is time to get help.

No diet will work. No plan with purchased food is good for anything but a jump-start which = another crutch you have to get rid of.

There is good, rich tasting food you can eat and enjoy, just not for the same reasons... your self image and reasons you eat more than to survive are about to have to change.

Some hard moments inside your head/in front of the mirror are about to happen & the harder they are the closer you get to being free... free from the cage of fat and lack of air/energy and free from the voice of hate and "can't" that you probably don't even hear any more because you act before hearing it.

Just know this, no matter what happens.
I am proud of you just for making that post, damn proud.

Bravo, Bigboy, you have indeed taken the first step!
Not to be overly critical, but I think there is a reason you put the weight on to begin with.
I have a great friend who weighs 500 pounds. After 8 years of nudging, she is finally seeing a counsellor because her weight problem stems from childhood trauma.
Don't give up!

There IS no skinny potion. You have to do it. What kind of help could we offer? You've told yourself everything we could say. You do every night as you lie awaiting sleep..... that tomorrow, you're not going to eat so much. but then you do.....

That said, I'll go ahead and ofer advice that you will think makes sense, but will not adhere to. I know this because I will not adhere to it either. (although I have been making a bit of progress lately)

You have to like being hungry. How often, and for how long are you hungry? you have to keep in focus that hunger is not an emergency.

It is a change you have to make to your personality, and therefore, v. diff.

I always view diets as having a beginning and an end. I realize that this is wrong. It has to be a change in how you percieve food.

While you are losing weight, though, it helps to be obsessed with a girl. Just never speak to her until you're skinny. And then, the other girls will be all over you, and she won't be able to resist you.

Dude, congrats on taking the first step. One thing that I found that worked for me is eating half as much more often, it sped up my metabolism. Drinking more water helped to - I found most of my weight was my body retaining water becuase it didn't know when it was going to get it next.
Have you talked to your doctor yet?

True on the water thing, a lot of the western people are dehydrated most of the time and we are actually thirsty when we think we are hungry for a snack.

Clear & copious. Drink tea in tea season; avoid coffee, and you should already be done drinking sodas.

Hydration is pretty essential.

Beyond that, my most productive strategy was not to eat past 8pm. Similarly, consider becoming vegetarian or vegan.

As a means of explaining food & digestion & basic strategies, this was very helpful & formative: http://www.fourmilab.ch/hackdiet/www/hackdiet.html

will power
mental pain
physical pain
light excercise
time. (even if it take 2 years to lose 100lbs, wouldnt it be worth it?)

dont look for the easy way out. set small goals that lead to bigger ones. ie, 1lb a week for 12 weeks. then 2 lbs a week for 12 weeks...)

the longer you stick to something the easier it will get.

Been there and don't want to go back. 4 years ago I was 439, now I am 301 and still losing. what works for me, is lots of water and a smaller portion. Eat only enough to satisfy, then go do something, get out of the house if nothing more than going outside.

Even though you are young, pace yourself. If it hurts then stop. Walking and water aerobics are what works for me. Set a daily goal and move in that direction. If you do not achieve that goal don't get discouraged and quit, just keep moving.

Find a support group, T.O.P.S., or O A is a good place to start. If you have a college or university in your town go to the Phyisical Education Department and talk to them about a low impact program, they will help you.

You did not get fat overnite, it WILL NOT come off fast! Trust me on this.

Look to your friends for help, more for emotional support, and company. Your diet is your business, do what works for you, not anybody else.

Jenni Craig is a waste of money. My SO and I eat salads and other lite fare, when we out for dinner we choose a buffet with a good salad bar, I eat alot of salad. One of our favorite summer meals is a salad containing canned chicken, cheese, prunes, orange slices, cashews and any thing else I can find.

Being 17 You are in high school, don't let life pass you by. Get out and do things with your friends. If the jocks and face boys give you a hard time ignore them, and get on with what you are doing. They are beneath your contempt. Remember you are bigger, stronger, and better looking than they are.

The only way this plan will work is to get out and do it!!!

The water thing is excellent advice, the colder the better. By drinking chilled water, you are forcing your body to expend energy bringing it up to body temperature.

To expand on what LJ said, losing weight and keeping it off requires a lifestyle change. A change in what you do and how you think. Some may say a pardigm shift. How you got to your weight took choices all along the way. You need to look at the choices you will make from now on.

You aren't a victim, you chose. You can choose differently. It takes a lot of awareness to snap out of habitual actions. I remember one time I decided I was going to "give pastries a rest". Not twenty minutes after that I was in a cafe and about to put a brownie in my mouth. I would have eaten it, but I dropped it and it fell onto a really grimy floor. As I stood there looking down at it I remembered that I had just decided that I wasn't going to eat pastries.

This wasn't lack of will power, this was TOTAL AMNESIA.

A really thought provoking movie I just saw was "what the bleep do we know?" It is more like a discovery channel/documentary than a feature film. It explores the nature of consciousness and how it is tied to our physical self. It looks at the connections from a biochemical point of view rather than a new age-y pov. Although, jz knight and ramtha appear, so I guess that makes it fair and balanced. /sarcasm

anyhow, good luck. You'll find no shortage of advice here, worth every penny you pay for it. ;)

One of the authors at my blog has lost 50 pounds since January. You might find his post encouraging:

http://addisonrd.com/WordPress/?p=632

Two words ... Richard Simmons. Get whatever the latest version of the Foodmover is. Follow the plan. While you're waiting for the kit to show up, start keeping a food diary ... write down everything you put in your mouth, as well as everything you do in terms of physical activity.

Don't worry about there being things you aren't able to do right now ... do what you can, adapt what you can't. Small steps lead to big successes.

What do you like to do ... what excites and interests you? Are any of these activities things that you can use to either motivate yourself, or adapt to a higher physical activity level?

Walk. Even if it's just to the end of your driveway and back. Start extending that ... closest end of the street, farthest end of the street. Don't run. Pay attention to what you're seeing on your jaunt.

Does anyone have suggestions for exercise? I hate walking, I find even going from class to class in school to be really tiring. Im always being told that swimming is good but I dont think I can bring myself to go in to a pool shirtless. And wearing a shirt just draws more attention to myself.

Wearing a t-shirt in the pool really isn't a big deal man. The important thing is that you're changing habits. One habit you may have to break is thinking everybody is watching and judging. It will turn out that most people are rooting for you not against you. Good luck getting in there.

walking is very boring. but you might find that swimming is "too difficult" to start off with and you might get frustrated quicker. i consider myself a fit person but when it comes to swimming, i dont think i could even make it to the end of the pool in one go. but then again i have no technique

if you make walking a challenge, it wont be as much of a chore. try walking a certain distance away from your house, until you start getting tired, then you have to walk back. the next day try and go a little further, and so on and so on. take some music to listen to as well.

just have a look around for the many different excercises you can do.

if you are embarrassed in public, even if someone goes as far as to call you names, who gives a fuck. youre doing something that they would never be able to do, youre stronger and more determined than they will ever be. no matter what anyone else says about you or thinks about you. its not going to stop you from achieving your goals. and as griff said, most people will be on your side, thinking "its really great that hes doing this, i hope he does well".

Aqua aerobics is a great way to start an exercise program. Its gentle on your joints, really supportive and you will be more able to complete a *workout*, than say, swimming laps.

Hydro is another great thing that I see at the gym regularly. You can just walk up and down in the hydro pool or just hold onto the side and do a jogging motion.

Couldnt agree with that more!

See your doctor and get a prescription of phentermine. I am trying to take off 100 pounds and this stuff really takes the hunger away. Your doctor may recommend something else. There is no reason to suffer feeling hungry.

Write down everything you eat. It adds up really fast.

Get some protein powder. They sell it at Wal-Mart. you can also buy it at bodybuilding.com. I use the whey protein. It's about 100 calories per scoop.

I have lost 25 pounds. I can hardly tell. Maybe I will notice when I've lost 50.

Getting started is the hardest part. After a couple of months you get used to it.

that's wrong. there are 200 reasons. suffer feeling fat and disgusting, or suffer felling hungry. suffering is important. when you suffer and come out the other side, you feel great.

hey, how tall are ya? you don;t like walking? tough shit! walk it off, candy ass!

Walking is boring, yes. But it's the easiest and cheapest form of exercise.

Stuff like swimming (which I would love to do on a regular basis) usually requires driving to someplace you can do it, exposing yourself to the ridicule of others (although a certain amount of stick-to-it-ive-ness often earns respect in a gym/fitness center setting, even if you don't look like the covermodels who are working out without sweating around you).

If you're looking for something more on the order of "possible to do in the privacy of your own home" there are a number of fitness videos/DVDs that cost under $30 and don't require any additional equipment, and start at all different levels of ability. My cable service has a bunch of free stuff on the On-Demand digital package, including WalkFit, Tai Chi and Yoga segments.

It's all going to be completely fucking boring ... but 20 minutes of boredom a day won't kill you.

I would not follow the suggestion of anyone who says to use meds (other than for a physician identified metabolism issue, or diabetes), either over the counter or prescription. Losing weight is about developing different habits, not about magic pills, which tend to have some pretty scary side effects.

Oh, and I am a past mistress of dealing with cruel heckling, teasing, torture, and the surviving of high school while fat. I always knew I was better than those stupid sonsofbitches.

If you are going to walk it is a good idea to get an MP3 player with some good books on cd or an on-line acct (though I have yet to find one that does not SUCK). Get into a good Sherlock Holmes story and you will walk several miles listening to it without knowing it.
I will rip as much as I have and send it to you, Scout's Honor my friend.
You could do the Appalachian Trail on my Moby Dick and it is awesome... of course I'm a nerd... but I will find something you like!
Regardless of what you want to do, an MP3 player is good and IPods suck... I love my MuVo for a fraction of the price, it works and takes regular batteries... who-da' thunk it!!!!

Walk a mile a day. Just one mile in one go. It's not that far. Just 10 city blocks or so. I've always found that my appetite decreased when I got moderate exercise.

Lay off pop and caffeine. Non-diet pop has a huge number of calories which are invisible because you're not eating them, you're drinking them. Caffeine stimulates appetite.

Pay attention and notice if you are eating to reward yourself or eating because you are anxious. Those issues require work in other areas.

oops one more. Consider getting a bike. Ride places you would normally take the car. You'll like the fact that you're getting there on your own power and you'll be amazed at how much exercise you get without noticing.

Would a bike be able to hold my weight?

Don't want to thread hijack, but I've lost 20-30 pounds since my wife left me (6 months ago). Several things did it:

Lack of money. I had to buy cheaper food, and less food, which also meant less eating out. Less eating out means a healthier diet (so long as I'm not replacing fried foods with fried foods).

Change of diet. When you decide to lose weight, do not decide to go on a diet, then later come off it. Never plan to come off a diet. What this means is stick with a "diet" that you can live with for the rest of the life. What this meant for me was dropping soda (mostly) in favor of cold tap water with lots and lots of ice (to the top of the glass!). I drink soda about once a week. I absolutely love drinking water now.

Motivation. You have to be motivated to do it. Find something that motivates you to lose weight and concentrate on it. Sure, you say you're tired of being made fun of, but passive aggression gets you no where.

Alternately, if you want to take the "easy way" out, consider some form of surgery. However, consult your doctor about this first. My mom was about 300-350 pounds at 5'1" and had gastric bypass surgery, as did my aunt (she weighed more). My aunt lost more weight (she weighed about 50-100 pounds more). Although, consider both of these were middle aged women with medical reasons for surgery (diabetes, back problems).

Speaking of which, do you have diabetes? A lot of morbidly obese people do. If so, that makes losing weight harder.

I don't know diddly squat about weight loss etc. All the advice you've been given seems to make sense. As far as exercise goes, I personally enjoy in-line skating more than anything else I've tried, but that not only requires skates but somewhere appropriate to skate and some experience and/or training to get the to point where you're getting some exercise out of it.

I would respectfully suggest, however, that you consider dropping a PM to Undertoad and ask him to change your nickname. Part of the issue is your self-image, and you can start by not carrying around a name that refers to your size.

I highly recommend the book: The Abs Diet from the writers at Men's Health magazine.

Its not a diet book. Its a manual for how to eat and how to exercise and the physiological justification for the plan they lay out.

Go to menshealth.com and search for "The Abs Diet" and have a look.

Just stay away from the criminal Atkins.

Atkins works for me. It breaks my addiction to carbs and I LOSE tons of weight. I am a carb junky. I must go cold turkey. After the induction period (2-3 weeks) I feel so much better, have so much more energy and my mental attitude is better. I'm doing the 'criminal' Atkins now and I feel goooooood!

Whatever works.

Sure, trade my heart to look good... why not? Oh, that's right, I love my family.
Some low carb is one thing, trading them for high fat is another. Another that is wrong.
And, such a drastic diet is only temporary and should never be taken on without professional help, that means a Dr., not some diet guru.

rkz--you don't HAVE to eat a pound of bacon at every meal on atkins. :rolleyes:

Oh, yeah, and I totally don't love my family. Ya dink.

I was speaking of my own reasoning... health is more important than looks. My, reasoning. Patience is more important than the risk.
Your emotional outburst is unwarranted.

That wasn't an emotional outburst.


Hooooooooooly shit.

Just your opinion of me.. a dink?

Verbal equivalent of pushing someone gently but playfully on the shoulder. Similar to 'ya big lug'.

I resent your implying that people on Atkins don't "love" their families.

You read that into my post on your own...
Atkins diet safety questioned

Atkins Facts - American Heart Assoc.

I've read the literature. ALL of the literature.

I happen to believe Atkins was right, esp. for carb addicts.

Flame away, imply we don't love our families and are more vain than anything else. I know what works for me.

yeah, but it would hurt your ass unmerciful.

Another article from same source says

Wow, you read stuff into a post that I did not write but can't read what I do write... now that's talent.
Nicely done... select only one of the articles to pick only a part of to critique.

rkz--I find you paranoid and just strange. What I meant was that I've read more than just your cherry picked articles. I've read the pros and cons of the diet.

Tsk, tsk. Picking fights where none exsist...I'm done with you.

I was saying that you read that I was implying something about others in a statement about myself but could not read when I stated very clearly what I meant by that statement. No one is picking a fight.
I have simply stated my opinion and backed it up. You have jumped-to conclusions, accused me and twisted my words with no reason or regard for facts.
I am most fortunate that you are done with me.

There is also a great website sparkpeople.com. They offer healthy lifestyle tips, calorie counting and record keeping, and a community of other people losing weight. It's free, which is nice.

I tried Atkins, and I lost weight on it, but I just craved carbs all the time and it drove me nuts.

The main reason that I decided to lose weight was fear of diabetes.

The Governor or Arkanasas, Mike Huckabee, lost 100 pounds after he was dignosed with diabetes. He wrote a book about his experience called, "Stop Killing Yourself with a Knife and Fork". The book is worth reading. When I think about going off my diet I pick it up and read a chapter. Huckabee's diabetes went away when he lost the weight.

I have been wanting to read that book.
Taking control of my weight and eating habits changed my life and outlook.
After years of games with Diets, I finally learned that there is no Diet. You will never stay on a "diet" for life... so why start on one? It is just trading one bad habit for another. The are all just money making gimmicks.
A life-style change along with an outlook change is the long term solution.
If I continued the Diet schill game I would be dead now, not just because of my weight, but for what it does to other conditions, conditions I did not know about then... take control now, yourself, don't give it to others for a temporary fix.
Unless that is what you want.

I just thought it was ironic - the link to it was on the bottom of the article you linked.

Water and start off by just walking. Build your stamina and the speed. When that "stops" working, shake up your routine and try lifting weights, when that "stops", go back to walking. Water, water, water......then you pee all night long. Really cramps the sleep cycle but....wooo baby! Do you look good!

Check with your local bike shop. I bet they can find something that works for you. LJ's right though. Don't try to start out with a racing saddle. Have the bike shop get you a "comfort" saddle that's appropriate for you.

Beach cruisers are fun and work great, here in FL you can get great ones that are ten-speed and amazingly comfortable. Don't know about anywhere else. Another plus is the shock absorption that they offer and that they are just cool, retro, and fun.
They can hold anyone.

The problem is i dont have much money

Then try walking. Just moving at all is a start. I was glued to my couch last year. This year I am forced to walk all over campus and it has really helped me feel better. Try a short walk.

Most bike shops have used bikes or can point you in the right direction.

I wholly recommend swimming (and food intake control). I took up swimming this year and it has been excellent. I've lost a little weight without changing my diet (about 2lb per month, starting at 175), and I'm so much fitter and toned, so some of the weight seems to have moved from the flabby areas to the limbs. So I look like I've lost twice as much weight as I have.

You say you worry about what people think when you swim?

1) stuff them. could you feel a whole lot worse? Why let them make you feel that way?
2) join an adult swim program. You're old enough and you will find that no-one will care about your size. Kids are cruel, adults are in the same boat.

As for the rest of it, tell us about your current diet. What do you eat and when? and why? Do you snack while watching TV? stop watching. Get addicted to the internet instead. if you're using your hands to type, it's hard to use them to eat. etc.

But above all, you've got to really want to do it, and to really want to do it you need to think about what your life will be like when you're thinner. What will you do? What excuses will you no longer be able to use? What are your excuses for not losing weight now? (I'm not dissing you here -everyone has excuses) For example, some people use being overweight as a mask for shyness. If you are shy, how are you going to deal with this when you no longer have your weight to hide behind? If you don't have an answer to this, it gives you an excuse for not losing weight. etc.

Good luck, you're doing well so far.

where do you live? rough vicinity will do.

How many times have you "done Atkins"?

If the answer is more than once, then it's a bullshit plan. A proper diet/plan/regime is needed only once. Anything that you need to repeat is a "yoyo diet" and at best is pointless.

Start slow. You didn't get fat overnight and neither will you get thin overnight. Don't drinkn soda, avoid anything with corn syrup, drink plenty of water.

Big boy, stop playing the "yes, but" game.
what should I do?
walk.
yes, but I don't like to walk.
get a bike.
yes but I don't have much money.
repeat ad infinitum.

no one on this board really gives a shit if you lose weight or if you die of a heart attack at 19 and have to be lifted out of your house by a crane.

If you really want to lose weight, then stop playing the "yes, but" game and get up off your ass and take responsibility for your life.
/sermon

A point well (if brutally) made. We can give you advice, we can support you, but we can't take your weight off you. We can be here for you, but we don't know you from Adam and it's no skin off our noses if you continue to bloat. We could read "Fat boy exploded" in the paper and not know it was you. So now it's on you to put up or shut up. I look forward to seeing your 10lb loss post. I wish you well.

I have to agree with the previous two posts.

Here are some additional suggestions: Go up and down the stairs, costs nothing and it's great exercise. Do you have any dirt trails near you? Maybe a park? Go walk over there, look at the birds and try to identify the flowers you see, it keeps it more interesting.

As others have said, you didn't gain the weight over night you will not lose it overnight. Concentrate more on changing your habits, don't worry so much about a diet, as you increase your activity level you will reduce the food intake and burn more calories.

When I worked in a bike shop we special ordered an "industrial" bike for a customer. They are built to carry loads and might be a good solution for you. However, I'd start working out without equipment other than sturdy shoes. The pool idea sounds great and would get you your workout without injuries which could halt progress. Are you able to talk to a doctor about this?

I've "done" it only once before. I didn't follow the plan the way I should have. It was my fault that it didn't lead to ultimate success as I quit caring about my food intake--a purely emotional decision.

BTW, do you consider every time you tried to eat more healthfully and blew it a "yoyo diet"-?