Kids/ Tattoos - What Age is Acceptable
 

The fifteen year old girl I work with on Saturdays has just had a tattoo, fully sanctioned by her mother.

My problems with my co-worker's tattoo are as follows:
- It's illegal. She is 15 and the minimum age in the UK is 18. Her mother let her have it as she has wanted one "like, forever"

- It's a fairy. Cute on a teenager, but very much of the moment. She chose it from a book on the day she went in.

- It's on the back of her neck. So she believes she will always be able to hide it. Of course this counts on her always having longer than collar-length hair.

For the record I have a tattoo myself – I have nothing against them per se. But I made my decision slowly and carefully and from our conversation I conclude that she hasn't.

Am I right in thinking she might regret it and deserved better guidance from her mother, or am I just over-cautious and perhaps getting a bit old? Obviously she's had it now and it's not my place to approve or disapprove. It was my reaction to it that surprised me and I wonder if it's a slippery slope down into being an old woman who thinks the world is going to hell in a handbasket and saying the kids these days don't know they're born.

Fifteen, bad, unless the tat has some kind of family significance and was discussed by the whole family IMO.
How is a few years going to change things if this is something that they want permanently?
Neck, very bad. Can have work issues.
Biggest issue, that you were not consulted... I would have freaked... but that is just me.

I think 15 is pretty young, but then again, I think getting a tattoo at 15 is alot better than these girls at 16 getting their boobs done...sorry, touchy subject here at the moment.

As to whether she will regret it, well, the technology to get rid of them now is pretty good....its only going to get better, so if she does regret it, she will be able to do something about it pretty easily and effectively.

I had my first tattoo done when I was 18 and my second at 22, I would like one more along my lower back...but I'm not in a great hurry until I figure out exactly what I want.

When my Mother freaked out at my tattoo, I tried to explain that it was great value for money..not much else I could buy that would last for the rest of my life :)

I don't think any age is acceptable, but that's just me.

I would think, though, that one should be of legal age to enter into a business contract, which in most places is 18. Shouldn't happen before that even with parental consent. I know from experience that there are a lot of stupid children with dumber parents out there.

It's just skin, it's temporary.

So, what kind of tattoos were they. Or you could just post a picture.

Can do when I am home and take a picture of my boob and my back I guess :p

I have a wizard on my back and a marvin martian on my boob

Lucky alien...

I'm 21 now. I've been thinking about getting a tatto for about three or four years. By now, I know I want one and am fairly certain that I want it on my upper arm. The only thing I''m not completely sure of yet is what exactly. It's probably gonna be a pentacle but I don't know yet how big, and what decoration I want around the circle.

I think 15 is too young, the age limits are there for a reason. I hate it how parents go about breaking age laws/letting their kids break age laws like this one when it suits them yet complain about other age laws being broken (like underage drinking or whatnot).

Where do you work right now? Do you intend to still be working that job when you're 40? Do you like wearing tank tops?

I like wearing tank tops. I study archaeology so presumably will continue working in that field. Which is quite a loose field to work in, no real bothering with things like tattoos.

It wouldn't be a huge one anyway, no more than a centimeter or 5 in diameter.

I think that one of the most misunderstood things about tattoos is that only in the simplest of senses are they are a permanent image on your body. More accurately, they are a permanent testament to a particular time, place, & mindset. Sundae's coworker will not grow up, look at her tattoo & think "oh, a faerie." She'll think of the little girl who got a tattoo of a faerie, & of the things that girl was thinking & doing at that point in her life. Done well, the tattoo tells a story of a good time or of a changing time, of something significant: not of a stupid time or a naive, youthful time. Time in the army, time in another country, time in another place.

In this sense, tattoos are more a collection of snapshots, or of postcards to yourself.

Excellent point Skunks, very true.
You also have to decide about whether you care what other people will assume about you from your choice of designs. ;)

Hmmm - I am sitting here pondering wtf Marvin says about me at 18 ?

[quote=Skunks]Sundae's coworker will not grow up, look at her tattoo & think "oh, a faerie." She'll think of the little girl who got a tattoo of a faerie, & of the things that girl was thinking & doing at that point in her life.[quote]

This helped me see things in a different way. I assumed that because my tastes & opinions changed dramatically from 15-25 that hers will as well. I felt she would be as embarrassed at permanent evidence of her tastes as I was embarrassed by my old diary. It may simply act as a postcard to her future self and I hope it does. But as Bruce says - will it still be the image she wants to project in future? It's a personal message to display after all.

Am glad that it's not just me that sees 15 as too young. Thanks to everyone for your opinions!

Tse Moana - wait another year with the image of the tattoo held in your mind. After all you'll have it for life (barring surgery). If you still want it after a year than go for it! This was the advice I was given, followed and made me confident I was right in my choice.

i think 15 is too young.

I have two tatts--one on my right shoulder blade and one on my left leg. I regret both, esp. the one on my leg.

Tit For Tat
 

Call me old fashioned, but I think tattoos should be reserved for sailors and bikers, those kinds of people. An anchor for the sailor, "Mom" for the biker, that kind of thing. This current craze involves many women, most of whom think that the tattoo makes them "hot" or "alternative." I think they're embarrassing, but that's just me. The ones on the small of the back are the worst.

I was born with a big birthmark on my neck, so I came with my own tattoo. It's not in the shape of anything, more like a DeKooning or Pollock painting.

That is a very out-dated way of looking at body art.

Out-dated
 

I'm outdated in many ways.

Anthropologically speaking, todays tattooing craze certainly deserves some analysis. It's very different than tribal cultures' tattooing, but also similar in some ways. All the black girls here in the ATL get tats, but they are so different than those the white girls get.

Whatev.

I was planning to do that :). Right now, the final image of what I want is not quite ready yet but when I do have the final image, I'll draw it and have it above my desk for a long time to see if I still like it after a while before taking the step of having it tattooed.

I, personally, have two: one on my shoulderblade and one high on my thigh, near my hipbone. I didn't get either until I was in my late 30's as I wanted to be sure I wouldn't regret my choice of design. Also, as an accountant, tattoo's aren't really considered acceptable conservative decoration :cool: . I love them both and plan to expand on the thigh one (it is a butterfly). Neither one can be seen unless I am wearing a swimsuit or naked (which I'm pretty sure won't happen at work). For me, these were symbols of freedom from an abusive marriage - the first I got as I was working on my escape plan and the second after I made it out (alive).

My former stepdaughter began begging for a tattoo and piercings at about age 13. Her dad and I said NO, NO and NO!!! Finally, at age 15, we told her she could get piercings done as long as they were not visible on her face. She got her tongue and belly button done at age 16. We insisted that she not get any tattoos until she was of legal age as she was too young to know what she would want to live with for the rest of her life. She just turned 24 and finally got her first tattoo (yeah Pangloss61, across the small of her back).


Nothing permanent (or visible) until they are of legal age, is my opinion.

Stormie

I got my ears pierced at 13. Does that count?

I still don't get it.
 

I don't know, stormi, it all reminds me of that book about "raunch culture," or that movie Thirteen. Why would a 13-year-old girl want a tongue stud? The answer to that question is probably more upsetting to me than the stud itself. I think a lot of women (and men) have forgotten how so many folks worked so hard to fight the objectification of women, the idea of women as "toys," and now it's all about that, and women are choosing it themselves. "That's the point" some say, that it's about freedom to do what you want, but that has consequences for our culture as a whole. I don't like the result, but I guess that's my problem, not your's or your daughter's. I see all these young girls and, yes, older women too, getting tattoos and piercings, reading any number of those useless "womens'" magazines, Desperate Housewives and a ceaseless obsession with sex. Sex sex sex. Viagra, and now a new liquid for women for better sex (saw it last night). It's so hedonistic and narcissistic. I know I'm sounding really conservative right now (I'm actually fairly liberal), but why can't we all be more cerebral, more intellectual. Are tattoos and piercings just about sex? Not always, but I think that the implication is there, and often it's explicit. way.

But what's wrong with sex? As long as it isn't promiscuous or indescriminate and there are other interests and intellectual pursuits, that is. I'm certainly not young but I see nothing wrong with having a healthy sex life and celebrating my body (such as it is, sags and all).

I've always been fairly easy going with allowing my kids to find their own forms of expression and style, even when I thought it was horrendous or obnoxious. The less I fuss over it, the less likely they are to use such things as a form of rebellion. In middle school, she went through a sort of goth stage. She wore the largest, baggiest pants she could find (size 40's wrapped around her size 0 waist and dragging on the ground), mens work shirts, spiked dog collars and stiff-as-a-board hair. It was nasty, ugly and gross. I tolerated it. And sure enough, she grew out of it and began dressing like a young lady again when she started high school.

Why did she want her tongue pierced? Because most of her friends had theirs done, of course. I decided (yes me, her father refuses to be involved in parenting) that a piercing like that could be removed and the hole would heal up, if she ever decides to get rid of it as opposed to a tattoo or face piercing which would leave permanent disfigurement.

The good news is they've turned out great so far. No criminals, junkies, alcoholics, or gangsters. She and my 18 yr old are respectful, helpful, and well mannered. They've developed a more mainstream style as they've matured which I think is common if their experimentations are gently guided instead of suppressed.

Now, my 10 yr old may be another story.

Stormie

Well...
 

...that sounds reasonable now. I don't know why I'm so uptight about the tattoos and the piercings; I'm not uptight about sex. Wish I had more of it, actually. It's been about 6-months for me. My girlfriend lives in Brazil, so it's only about twice a year I get to see her. We've been "together" since 2001. Hard to fathom that we have not found another mate, because we agreed that if we did we would have to become "just friends" and we are both ok with that.

My girlfriend's 12-year old neighbor gives blowjobs in the pool bathroom.

Let me repeat.

She is 12. She sucks cocks in public bathrooms.

But is mainstream all it's cracked up to be? What's so great about it?

Maybe mainstream isn't the word I should have used as I am a bit of a non-conformist myself. I meant that as a child matures, they need to be able to enter the workforce and if their style is TOO 'out there', they will be excluded from some professions. I want my children to be able to become anything they want. Also, I believe that a person with a strong sense of self esteem and solid level of confidence doesn't need to look bizarre in order to attract attention. A lot of the more outlandish 'looks' I see are a visual 'fuck you' from kids who don't much like themselves (or their world). I think that once they become more grounded they tend to want to stick out less and if the symbols of their rebellion and confusion are permanent, they are in a bit of a pickle, aren't they?

Stormie

That is a child without parental supervision and who has probably been sexually molested at some point in her life.

It is very sad that a child was brought into the world and subjected to such a life. It is even sadder that someone would actually LET a 12 yr old suck them off.

Stormie

No, no history of molestation.. shes just, to be honest, a slut. Simple as that.

And you know why? It's society's fault. Society fucked her.

I have nothing against sex, but I firmly believe it should mean something.

Whoa
 

This presents us with that slippery slope of causation. She sucks cocks in public bathrooms because "society" made her that way, because she was molested, or because she freely chooses to do so. I don't know.

I don't buy it.

I don't believe that a 12 yr old who has had decent parental supervision, has been taught right from wrong and to respect herself would do that without an abusive introduction to sex. My girls hadn't a clue what a cock was until sex ed class and they certainly had no idea how to give a blowjob. My oldest was 17 when she lost her virginity and my 18 yr old still hasn't lost his.

I think it is a cop-out to blame society because I've raised 3 children past the age of 18, have two on the way to 18, and none of them have behaved in such a manner. Sure it means you have to actually be home with your children instead of going out partying, you have to (gasp) talk to them, teach them, and spend time with them instead of parking them in front of the tv or pawning them off on a babysitter. Too many parents don't take the time to set limits and enforce them, get to know their children's friends and their families, or pay attention to signs that their child is in trouble.


I blame the parents. Parenting isn't optional after the child is born.

Stormie

Parenting
 

I'm sure many "rents" would agree with you.

Not to discredit your hard work, but I've known parents that try their darndest to do everything right, everything like you said and advocate, yet their kids still become bad. Bad seeds. Bad brains (not the rock groups). Other kids grow up in the worst of circumstances and end up ethically sound and sexually healthy. It's probably a blend of nurture and nature, rather than one or the other.:neutral:

I agree actually. Maybe I just got lucky.

Mothers of Intention
 

Yeah, we do get lucky sometimes. My mom force-fed religion to me and never ever even discussed sex. The latter was a bad place for her (Catholic with 6 kids). She's become more fanatical over time and now champions Dobson and Robertson. It's embarrassing.:sniff:

You must not know Maryland too well if you think they dont know... I know a girl who got fingered her first time and gave her first handjob at age 9. No joke. It's downright disgusting what goes on that parents never hear or want to hear about, some places.

We could have the same mother!!! Except mine is Seventh Day Adventist, not Catholic. Needless to say, we don't have much to do with each other.

Ibram, thats my point exactly. It is a parent's responsibility to know exactly what their kids are up to. I'm not saying that kids that age don't know these things, I'm sure there are. I just think it is sad that kids are left to their own devices and have the time and opportunity to get into trouble.

Since I started posting on this thread, I've been wracking my brain trying to think of a time when any one of my children may have in a situation where they weren't supervised by a trustworthy, responsible adult and I can't think of one. It does mean that I rarely hire babysitters and never leave them alone while I go out. It means we are nearly always together and I know precisely what they're doing. They're active kids in that they take Tai Kwon Do, dance, gymnastics, and art classes. They participate in paintball, console and pc gaming, as well science and crafts projects. We have a music room and all play various instruments. I have a hotrod that we're working on. My house is grand central because all their friends want to come here and hang out and that is exactly the way I want it. Supervision...Supervision...Supervision!! (Plus they're too busy to get bored and find trouble ;)

The acceptable age is the age that they do not have to have your written consent, in Oklahoma, a notarized statement. I did that for my son when he was 15 to get his tongue pierced, even then, we had to drive to Kansas to legally get his tongue pierced. I did that because he had been begging for a tatoo for a couple of years, and his 15 yr old best friend had just gotten a tatoo from his Mom for his 15th b-day. So I let him get his tongue pierced instead.
I told him that I did not ever want him asking me "Why did you let me do that?" He is now 19 1/2 years old and has not gotten a tatoo in the 18 months that he could legally have gotten one. (Kansas is only a 40 min. drive away for us).

No, no history of molestation.. shes just, to be honest, a slut. Simple as that.

And you know why? It's society's fault. Society fucked her.

How so ??
Because she is young ??
Because she is an under age girl ??
Because some body told her NO ???

Please young sir jump up on your soap box and tell us ALL why it is society's fault.

Yeah, I can't wait to hear how society made one person a slut but not everyone.

What I'd like to know is how a person can be so sure another has never been molested...or had any of the other numerous things happen which can cause these types of behaviours to be exhibited.

We teach our children to be secretive at a young age...even more so does this apply to children who have been abused in some way.

Oh, and about Tattooing, I reckon kids should be legal adults before they make these kinds of decisions. As has been noted previously, there are laws about these types of things for a reason.

For the record, I have two tattos and in the climate I live in, they're visible most of the time. If someone chooses to judge me for them, that's their problem not mine. They've never harmed my employment opportunities either. My partner doesn't have any tattoos, but he likes mine. I'll probably get more one day. Just deciding what I want for now.

Her parent's inability to parent does not make her "society's fault."

I did not cause her to have reprehensible personal habits and such a lack of self esteem that she seeks approval through sexual acting out.

And, incidentally, I think the sick fucks that are on the receiving end need to go down (sorry) for statutory rape. It takes two to tango, as the saying goes, and since she's not legally capable of consent, it falls on the recipient.

It may not be society's fault, but I blame society because I know too many people with near identical stories around maryland, and because around DC, if both parents dont work full time, you're too poor to afford a house, and this constant state of parents not being home... yeah.

THAT is what I've been trying to put into words ever since I first read this...


THAT TOO!!

Is she servicing males her own age? Older? Younger? :eek:

I have a miniature dot tattoo done on my left thumb . I did it myself in a boring maths lesson at the age of fifteen . Ink and a compass . Easy . I think girls should be encouraged to do their own tattoos . Cheaper for the parents , and empowering for the girl .

I offer this advice to give your daughters who want tattoos (hey, people can do what they want but I find them tacky) Just tell her to tell her pressuring peers "Tattoo? That would be like scribbling on the Mona Lisa. You just don't mess with a work of art."

You forget that the Mona Lisa only looks enigmatic because the canvas has buckled , Shawnee .

And loads of stuff behind her have been painted in and then out , and then in again .

I have a tiiiiny 'tattoo' on my arm, where I sharpened a mechanical pencil to a super fine point, then to see how sharp it was, tapped myself extremely lightly on the arm. The little gray spot is still there, two years later.

I hope you all know that the word 'tattoo' is Polynesian . I have a few interesting historical anecdotes about Polynesian tattoos and the theme of Polynesia / Europe .

It is recorded that a tattooed Polynesian sailor had a love affair with a working-class girl from London . A baby was born , and the mother was surprised to see that the baby did not have any tattoos ( usually they are worried about toes , not tattoos...) She thought they were genetic ( the t This story can be found in Peter Dillon's nineteenth century account of the search for La Pérouse .

woops , clumsy fingers . Sorry .

The other anecdote concerns the story of the Bounty mutineers , and another Peter . Peter Heywood . Peter Heywood did not go to Pitcairn with the other mutineers . He stayed in Tahiti , where at the age of eighteen he founded a young family with a Tahitian woman .

He underwent the full-scale buttock tattoo of the Tahitians . One can visualise the effect as being that of dark shorts .

The British Navy eventually got hold of him and dragged him off for a court marshal in Britain . He got off lightly due to his youth and the fact that he came from an influential Manx family .

He became a member of the British establishment , and he married an Englishwoman . There were no children , and he never went back to Tahiti .

Imagine . Every day of his life he saw those Tahitian tattoos on his body .

Luckily, I used the Mona Lisa as an example of art that young ladies will likely be familiar. The point is not looking like the Mona Lisa, but looking like a work of art.

Works of art are never static , Shawnee . If you want the young ladies to be static and without imagination , tell them to use pornography as a stimulus . Not art .
Please do not sully our Mona Lisa thus .

While working in screen printing & sculpting I always thought of the finished product as a by-product. Art is a verb, it was only art as I was creating it.
Must have been why I settled on acting?

Because you are so adept at missing points entirely, I will only go so far as to say that I do believe young ladies should self-express. I don't believe the "bumper sticker" way of doing so shows any sort of the imagination you pretend to tout.

Imagination? I'm all for it. As a matter of fact, I am imagining you right now, as a child. Sitting in the back of the classroom, all pudgy and pock-faced, lacking all but the most rudimentary social graces. You had learned to hold a fork at mealtime but couldn't seem to control all the grunting and snorting involved as you tried to keep the embarrassing snot from rolling down your face. Spit wads flew in your direction, and you had been the recipient of more than one "wedgie."

Lacking the physical power at that time to retaliate, you swore you would get revenge. Luckily, you avoided going all Columbine, and have since found your power in your anonymous internet forum attacks. I bet if you ever worked in a restaurant, you would be the type to spit in people's food. Now, I'm sure your anger is manifested in whatever form food-spitting takes in your line of work. You sit there at your computer and attack anyone you hope will bow down and praise your supposed intelligence and class level. You forget that real class lies not in bringing others down, but in lifting others up. Because you have been so randomly abusive, I cannot offer you that quality of class in me I usually give so freely.

Attack away, at any one of us. I believe we can rise above it. I cringe not at your cries for attention. I welcome them, I revel in them.

...Pwned.

Thanks Ibram. I had to google that to know what it meant. If I say so myself, I agree! :)

You had to google "pwned"? That's sad, my friend.

:lol: