what do you reach for?
 

One dark and stormy night, on which the moon peaked through the clouds overhead, suddenly a knocking came at the door to your house, rap. rap. rap. Looking quickly trough the bedroom window, you see standing on the front porch a shadowy figure, skulking beneath the overhang. Before rushing downstairs you have time to take but a single object, what do you reach for?

My mobile phone. I'll speak through the door to see who it is. If I don't know them they ain't comin in and I'll call the police.

I reach for the light switch.

Oh, hi Mom. What are you doing out on a night like tonight?

I roll over and go back to sleep, as I am obviously unable to physically see what I think I see? ;)

The vodka bottle tipped over next to my bed.

My husband's ass, to push him out of bed. He can deal with it.

lol@ binky

Well I guess it would depend on if it were say...Halloween or not...or early in the evening. I could have left my lights on.*shrug*


...gotta be scarier...like taking a glass cutter to the window I might get a knife out then call the coppers.

At both of my houses (mom's and dad's, yes they're divorced) it is physically impossible to see the front porch and the driveway, so this scenario is one that I deal with whenever someone comes over (day or night) if I'm home alone, and someone knocks, I always have to decide whether or not I feel it's safe enough to try and answer it. I'm little, and female, and in the middle of the woods where nobody could possibly hear me scream, so it's a very nerve wracking thing. A lot of times I just plain don't answer, other times I'll get something hard and pointy up my sleeve in my hand...just in case and I always crack the door open juuust a little to make sure it's safe first.

A hammer. This has happened before. My husband is always fast asleep and I don't want to have to wake him up to take out a crackhead.:)

We both love the hammer, I noticed this as soon as we started dating, any problems and we both seemed to gravitate towards the hammer. We had a utility hammer left in a drawer and one in the bedroom for bad neighborhood control. It's kind of an unspoken preference in our household.

This also happened at my last job, it was night in an unsavory neighborhood, a side door was left open, and someone whistled to see if anyone was there. After they asked repeatedly if I was alone they left. I had no hammer but they could tell by the look in my eyes that I was not afraid and might just take their head off. I am a tiny female, but I can scare the hell out of a lot of people when they are trying to create a problem. In which case, I grabbed an attitude and resourceful thinking. I didn't even bother with the phone...Just scared the asshole away.

Sidenote: None of that applies if what you are looking at is not human looking, or the coyote you were expecting to see.....I call it "not a coyote" in which case you just lock your door and hope that it leaves and try to get a photo of it. There, you grab a camera and take a photo of it as best as you can.

urk! @ the "not a coyote"

Obvoiusly it's a candygram, rush down and open the door!

d-----n

That doesn't spell tazer. Someone figure out that riddle up there.

Oh, and let me know what the answer is.

Doberman?

2 minutes.


LJ's nightmare ( lay off the cheese last thing dude)

Taser.:shock: Shit, dont have one. Baseball bat. Big one.

dolphin!....

land dolphin.....that candy gram is clearly a land dolphin. you can tell because its flukes are horizontal.

*Wonders if it's possible to swim with a land dolphin*

I grab the Drastic Plastic ( Glock ) and hand the phone to my wife

Darnit, people, you're making my flashlight look pathetic. I suppose I can blame that on my seriously naive view of the world. I live in a place where I literally leave my doors unlocked ALL THE TIME, and I would never dream that anyone would steal my car or break in.

(Move your children to New Hampshire. It's safe and snuggly here.)

euphoriatheory, I live in the sticks as well ,
but I grew up in the city ,
old habits are HARD to break .

Well that's..... terrifying. ;)

I can't imagine having to live in the city... I mean, I live in Concord, it's the third biggest city in the state, and I STILL never lock my car. I walk down the street by myself at 11 o'clock at night and don't think twice about it. Throw me into Boston and I'd be dead in a week. I just don't believe that people want to hurt me and steal my things, which the rational side of me realizes is freaking ridiculous.

I live waaaay out in the boonies too, the likelihood of a crazed penis-dolphin-shark-skulking-shadowy figure (or other person) with the intent to harm me is very, very silm...but being alone also means that IF something did happen...there's nobody to help me but me.

First time I have locked my doors or locked my car since I moved out of home (parents).

I wouldnt hesitate to walk down the street alone at nite though.

I live in a little semi-rural village on the edge of a small northern industrial town, one which has undergone a certain amount of gentrification in recent years....I do leave my door unlocked from time to time if just nipping to the shop, but I shoudn't...one of the houses in this mews was burgled a couple of years ago. Car crime is rife even here, nobody leaves their car unlocked.

Doesn't anybody have a dobie-o-matic?

I have a bass-o-matic. . . . But in this case I'd reach for my aluminum softball bat...or my telescopic baton.

I live in the styx amongst rampant crime and it's worse in Fanta Se....People break in out here in the country all the time, and at work in the city. People leave their car doors locked but sometimes they just bash the window in anyway. So you just don't leave anything in the car of value and keep your doors locked. They've even started to poison dogs out here in the styx to get in to your house while you are away. My landlord stays around the property most of the time and everyone knows that, so this place isn't messed with.

There are lots of gangs down here. After the rest. was robbed, I talked to a detective here that said most of the crime happening around can be attributed to some multi-generational crime families; that of course adopt the border jumpers...But living here is still like living in the old west and old Mexico, so I am not surprised. There is random crime and violence here everywhere. I thought I would move to NM and get some peace and quiet out in the boonies. heh. Right. Even the feds I spoke with don't like gringos...fuckin' great.

I'm thinking about New Hampshire, thanks Euphoria!!

The sweatshirt I usually have hanging on the end of the bed. I hate getting cold.

First? The shorts at the end of the bed. I'll be damned if I'll get caught by some intruder looking like I'm cold.

then I'll grab the golf club.

This thread is the #1 Google hit for "what do you search for?" ... imagine the influence we'll wield.

it will be of whale penis proportions if we try.

Wouldn't that be, "what do you reach for"?

We have Meth heads ( Niebor just down the road Cooks the shit , Not unusual to hear WHHHOOOOOOMMMMMBBBBB !!!!!!! as a fire ball rolls in to the sky at 2am as he and buddies are Whoopn' , shootn' , and rideing 4 wheelers ) .
Thats why I get out and Boom with my .44mag lever gun in the side yard every now and then , speaking of witch its been a while , think I'll pick up a box of rounds on the way home :sniper: :rattat: :magnum: :magnum:

HECK YEAH, CICERO!

The N.H. boondocks is the place to be, I swear to God... my sister keeps telling me to lock my car doors, and I tell her the day I get robbed is the day I'll agree. ;) I literally NEVER lock my car doors, and only lock my apartment door when I'm home alone overnight. This will likely change as my husband and I are about to buy our first house, and he'll be gone to Iraq for a year, but I've also been trained in the military and know how to fire a weapon.... so I just don't quite feel scared yet. I'm armed. Most of my neighbors are honest. I feel pretty secure that anyone skulking around my door at 2 a.m. are friends who need someone to talk to.

Why they haven't called my phone is another mystery though. At that point, it probably IS flashlight and handgun.

I search for my camera, because it's probably that gang of 25 year old nymphomaniacs again, wanting some action.:D

And they're at your house because . . . . :confused:

They need to borrow his camera. :rolleyes:

Nope, they just know they're safe here.:D

Yup, for me it would be my nightshirt (seen in a recent RFN photo)
But if it were late at night and HM wasn't home I'd put the chain on the door before answering.

Chances are it's HM - he hasn't forgotten his key yet but who else would knock late at night except our batty neighbour.

That's if I hear it in the first place - I sleep with earplugs in.

oh....phone.
The first time I leave my house for like 3 days and I have to call the cops...(yesterday)
I was looking forward to friday aaah! This time about 4 city blocks from that place on Cerrillos we were talking about a couple days ago.

http://www.cellar.org/showthread.php?t=16946

I was at a different gas station, in the same neighborhood.
:eek:

We had a bear or something crashing around outside a while back. Pete thought it was funny that coming out of a deep sleep I grabbed a sword and ran outside. I should maybe get a serious blade...

Can't happen to me. He would be to affraid to come by my street.

Good idea, it could be Kung Fu Bear.

That's them! The nymphomaniacs! With the camera!