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-   -   April 29, 2010: Stiff (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=22621)

xoxoxoBruce 04-28-2010 11:08 PM

April 29, 2010: Stiff
 
There's David Morales Colón, sitting on the Honda his uncle gave him, down in Puerto Rico.

http://cellar.org/2010/funeral.jpg

Looks pretty life like, doesn't he? What??

Quote:

Well, suffice it to say that the funeral directors at Marin Funeral Home in San Juan's Hato Rey neighborhood have a flair for the unorthodox. For example, in 2008, they embalmed another young shooting victim and displayed his body standing up for the duration of a multi-day wake.

Back to the present: Yesterday and today, callers who stopped to pay their final respects to the late Mr. Colón got a bit of a surprise. Instead of the traditional presentation of the body in a casket, Mr. Colón's corpse, dressed in casual duds and sunglasses, was instead posed in a very lifelike position atop his Repsol-liveried Honda CBR600 F4.
I wonder who shot him and why?

link

floatingk 04-28-2010 11:17 PM

Thats white knuckle....

HungLikeJesus 04-28-2010 11:24 PM

What I find interesting is the position of his left ankle.

rditlkustoleit 04-29-2010 12:04 AM

So, I wonder what position Larry Craig will be posed in at his funeral?

SPUCK 04-29-2010 04:49 AM

What's flipping amazing is he was shot at 27 times with the very potent 40cal pistol. He was hit with 19 rounds.

He was talking to a 14 year old girl who caught two of the rounds with her legs.

The corpse looks good for that much trauma with that weapon.

spudcon 04-29-2010 06:46 AM

Maybe his muffler was too loud.

Trilby 04-29-2010 06:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spudcon (Post 652408)
Maybe his muffler was too loud.

then it was justifiable homicide.

Sheldonrs 04-29-2010 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HungLikeJesus (Post 652393)
What I find interesting is the position of his left ankle.

There's a dead guy on a motorcycle and it's his ANKLE you find interesting?!!!


:D

glatt 04-29-2010 08:57 AM

His baseball hat appears to be nailed to the back of his neck. And his shirt tail looks like it's nailed to the bike seat. Maybe that helps keep him from falling off?

birdclaw 04-29-2010 08:59 AM

It's creepy to me that his hat seems to be tucked into the collar of his shirt. Makes me wonder if that's to hold some "bits" in.:thepain:

Sheldonrs 04-29-2010 09:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt (Post 652421)
His baseball hat appears to be nailed to the back of his neck. And his shirt tail looks like it's nailed to the bike seat. Maybe that helps keep him from falling off?

See?! Even DEAD, bikers get nailed!

jinx 04-29-2010 11:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt (Post 652421)
His baseball hat appears to be nailed to the back of his neck. And his shirt tail looks like it's nailed to the bike seat. Maybe that helps keep him from falling off?

Yeah there's gotta be some kind of support going up his back to hold him up.

newtimer 04-29-2010 11:27 AM

Will they bury the motorcycle, too?

dmg1969 04-29-2010 11:48 AM

Ironically, I have to attend a viewing tonight and the funeral tomorrow (my wife's aunt). Somehow, I don't expect anything quite like this....

glatt 04-29-2010 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jinx (Post 652435)
Yeah there's gotta be some kind of support going up his back to hold him up.

It almost looks like there might be a rope tied to the back of his hat, hidden under his collar, and the hat is stapled to his forehead to keep his head pulled up and back.

Impressive work there, whatever it is.

Shawnee123 04-29-2010 11:59 AM

Maybe they drained all his fluids and filled him with cement?

Diaphone Jim 04-29-2010 12:14 PM

Open caskets are tough enough to handle sometimes, but this is seriously creepy.
If he had been a jockey, would they have shot his horse for the display?
And what if he had been a contortionist? Gahh!

Sundae 04-29-2010 12:24 PM

I thought this thread might have been about Jose Mourinho last night.

As you were.

XAgent 04-29-2010 01:05 PM

Wow, that is pretty creepy.. and interesting of course.

It's like he's stuck in time.. speeding along the golden highway.

spudcon 04-29-2010 01:52 PM

Yup, looks like a board bolted to the bike, runs up his back and nailed to the back of his head. Elbows nailed to his knees, and hands glued to the handlebars. Hope he doesn't get a cramp.

classicman 04-29-2010 03:42 PM

1 Attachment(s)
How bout this from the link in the article....
Quote:

Drug Dealer Lamborghini Wake Pic
This “hip hop executive” (word on the street: drug dealer) had his wake in his new yellow Lamborghini. Bury him in the car? No, it was sold. And sold again, and again, and again. Last I heard this creepy exotic was still for sale, with a recent owner changing the original interior colors (McDonalds Red and Yellow) in an attempt to hide its history.

Gravdigr 04-29-2010 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Google Translator
Pantojas Medina, who was hit 11 times, had asked to be that way to ensure your favorite clothes.

At least I have my favorite clothes.:lol2:

Gravdigr 04-29-2010 05:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diaphone Jim (Post 652461)
And what if he had been a contortionist? Gahh!

Save money on the casket? Put him in one of those baskets snake charmers use?

monster 04-29-2010 08:33 PM

Viewings. Ugh. So not British. But I might be tempted if they were all done like that.

xoxoxoBruce 04-29-2010 10:04 PM

What? They don't do wakes?

Shawnee123 04-30-2010 07:33 AM

A year or so ago they took my youngest niece (almost 4 at the time) to a visitation. After, someone asked her about it (you know, bringing it up so if she had any questions, etc.)

She shrugged and said "We got there and the guy was already dead!"

monster 04-30-2010 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce (Post 652584)
What? They don't do wakes?

I think the Irish are a little more into it, but generally, the undertaker comes and gets the corpse. Close relatives may go and see the body at the funeral home if they desire (private appt) but it's not an expectation and there are no "visiting hours" where mourners receive guests and an open casket is on display (which is what I understand happens here but haven't actually been to one).

Then they hold the funeral -closed casket- dispose of the body (usually cremation) and then all round to the deceased's house or Auntie Mary's for sandwiches and booze and family arguments.

xoxoxoBruce 04-30-2010 09:02 AM

OK, thanks. I didn't realize they don't do the happy hour before the Bon Voyage.

Sundae 04-30-2010 01:52 PM

Anyone else think about Against a Dark Background here?
Occurred to me after I logged off last night.

Second what Mons said.
I've never been to an open casket funeral, although they are sometimes shown on tv/ films as tear-jerking opportunities.
Also cremation is really popular here. I understand that the body is not prepared in the same way for a cremation. I might be wrong there, as Nanny was cremated and we went to see her in the Chapel of Rest on the same morning. No blue spots that I could see.

And and as a further point, British Irish (in my experience) hold the wake AFTER the funeral and without the body in the house these days. It's still a mighty old piss-up, but everyone is sober for the funeral. Given the length of a funeral Mass that's pretty useful.

I was the only person drunk at Nanny's funeral. I was out partying with the nurse's the night before :rolleyes:
I slipped over on the dancefloor and bust my knee - couldn't kneel at all. I had to pretend, hovering on my good knee. I'd have brought shame on the family otherwise. I also had to run and puke while cutting fat off the "good" ham for funeral sandwiches.

Still, I was pissed as a fart the night she died too. Mum got me up out of bed to kiss her goodbye... I only cried because I was booze-sodden and tired. Wicked grandchild that I was.

Elspode 05-02-2010 09:51 PM

They're gonna have to bury this cat in a square coffin. That body position does not lend itself to your standard model.

xoxoxoBruce 05-02-2010 11:32 PM

Oh I dunno... with 19, 40cal holes in him, he may be pretty flexible.


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