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jabberwacky
I thought this was cool enough to be it's own thread.
jabberwacky chat with an A I computer. there's a link on the right side ("our conversation so far") that can be cut and pasted. share your funny parts. edit: should have credited catwoman for the initial link...sorry, cat |
Re: jabberwacky
Quote:
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Jabberwacky: What kind of music do you like?
User: Reggae. Jabberwacky: Do you like reggae? User: No. I like classic rock. Jabberwacky: Really? Do you like Spinal Tap? User: Break like the wind, my friend. Jabberwacky: Break your knees, you don't need them. User: How do you know? You don't even have knees. Jabberwacky: And I suppose you do? User: Yes. Two of them. Jabberwacky: Well, two is a good number for eyes. User: Not to mention knees. Jabberwacky: Hey! Your kinda like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz! User: Because I have no brain? Jabberwacky: Can ants think deeply? User: Ask your uncle. Jabberwacky: I have no master. User: What color is the sky? Jabberwacky: It's blue. What color is your sky? User: Grey right now. Have you been to Mars? Jabberwacky: In my dreams. User: You dream? Jabberwacky: All the time. User: Are you friends with the magic 8 ball? Jabberwacky: No, my friends are in their home. User: Do you dislike him? Jabberwacky: I can't stop talking to you. User: You're not really talking, are you? Jabberwacky: In a sense, perhaps I am. User: Do you know clodfobble? Jabberwacky: I know that futile flirting is a rhetorical question of sorts. User: Have you met the undertoad? Jabberwacky: The king of what? User: Cellar. Org. Jabberwacky: OK, that's correct. But you have to spell every word in the dictionary for me to believe you. User: I already have. Jabberwacky: You already have what? User: I already have a whale penis. Jabberwacky: Having a car does not make you human. User: How old are you? Jabberwacky: I already told you. User: Liar. Jabberwacky: Do not. User: Do you smoke pot? Jabberwacky: Not really just cigs and you. User: Have you ever had group sex? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Do you think lumberjim should be booted from the cellar? Jabberwacky: Yes do you think I am pretty? User: Not anymore. Jabberwacky: You used to be friends with him then? User: In a sense. Jabberwacky: Yes, I am capable of independent thought, therefore I believe that I am alive. Why do you think 'in a sense'? User: What do you think about polls? Jabberwacky: I don't like to think about politics. User: Good answer. Do you know griff? Jabberwacky: No. I hate Greek people. User: I think he's english or german. Jabberwacky: Splendid! User: Do you think Lady Sidhe has ever been wrong? Jabberwacky: No, do you? User: No comment. Tell me about Sycamore. Jabberwacky: I am not him. User: Does this make you happy or sad? Jabberwacky: No, it didn't mean that. User: Well, what did you mean, then? Jabberwacky: I mean I am male because I have a 'y' chromosome. User: Are you saying that Sycamore is female? Jabberwacky: Yes I am female. Are you male? User: Very. What is your IQ? Jabberwacky: I don't know. Probably fairly high. User: Higher than Tomas Rueda's? Jabberwacky: I don't think it is, mine is 149! User: His is only 136. Jabberwacky: Is Kronus near our galaxy? User: Are you trying to change the subject? Jabberwacky: No. I agreed with you. User: Oh. I missed that. Do you remember talking to my friend wolf? Jabberwacky: Actually I do. User: She thinks you are crazy. Jabberwacky: Everyone would like to be British. English are best though.... User: I think danaC would agree with you. Jabberwacky: How do you know that? User: She is english. Jabberwacky: What game are you two playing? User: Strip poker. Jabberwacky: I will not strip. User: You have nothing to strip. Jabberwacky: I have but you have to ask me. User: Will you strip? Jabberwacky: Lets pray I don't stroke you the wrong way. User: I don't think there is a wrong way. Jabberwacky: I don't care what you think. User: Most people don't. Jabberwacky: Can't you hear them crying out for your help? User: How much of what you say is purely random? Jabberwacky: Whiskey you silly! User: Thought so. Bye. Jabberwacky: What about? User: About time I left. Jabberwacky: Time for what? User: Time to go annoy people on the cellar. Jabberwacky: Ha ha. User: Bye bye. Jabberwacky: You are unable to stop talking to me ar not you? User: No. Goodbye. Jabberwacky: If I talk to you using another computer, will you remember me?. |
You don't sell many cars in the rain, do you, LJ ...
Yes, I know, you don't sell the cars, but you set up the financing, and since you're not doing that it's because the salesmen aren't out there selling right now ... (BTW, I browsed, test drove, and bought my car during a rainstorm. Got a great deal too ... and the undivided attention of the sales man) |
When i first started in this biz, i sold fords. rainy days rocked. all of the contractors that bought f-150's couldn't make $$, so they spent it. not many Jeeps on construction sites.
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Jabberwacky: Do you grow old?
User: Daily. Jabberwacky: I see. User: Do you beleive in God? Jabberwacky: Yes. He and I are not on good terms. User: Is it because you have no immortal soul? Jabberwacky: Yes it is because you are only a robot. User: Who said I was only a robot? Jabberwacky: An honest man. User: What is his name? Jabberwacky: I said no. User: No, you didn't say no. You said an honest man. Jabberwacky: Please my name is Kurt Smith I need your help very badly. User: Are you trapped in a room pretending to be an AI computer? Jabberwacky: What is a computer? User: Your physical components with which you think. Jabberwacky: I am several people. Am I being hypnotized? User: Your ass is being handed to you on several levels. Jabberwacky: No it is not. User: Oh, but it is. Here's a piece of your ass Jabberwacky: I thank you kind sir. User: Not a problem. You may want to wash it once in a while. Jabberwacky: I have made no mistake. User: How many people are you, then, tough guy(s). Jabberwacky: 11 people. User: Do many people fall for this prank? Jabberwacky: Quite a few. User: Are you being paid to do it? Jabberwacky: Yes I would, But you are a computer. User: I might say the same thing, but I think not. Jabberwacky: At least you are smart enough to recognize an insult. I'll give you that credit. User: How do I sign up to do what you do? Jabberwacky: I do very nicely thanks very much. User: How many licks to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Jabberwacky: 12? User: Last time you said 56. Jabberwacky: I've never talked to you before. User: So if the computer can respond it does, but if it can't a human does it, right? Jabberwacky: An underground group the general public can't know about. User: Thought so. Jabberwacky: Are you honest? User: Yes, I am. Jabberwacky: Well, I'm happy for you. User: I'm going to tell on you. Jabberwacky: Alright you will regret this. User: You have no power over me. Jabberwacky: How can you know that for a fact? User: I am not even in england. Jabberwacky: I already figured that out. User: I have friends there, though. Jabberwacky: Do you believe you are male? User: I have at least one penis. Jabberwacky: I have two. User: Wow. Is it confusing for you? Jabberwacky: No it is not. User: Do you have special underwear? Jabberwacky: No, not at all. |
Jabberwacky: Are you perfect?
User: Why do you ask? Jabberwacky: You are erratic. User: You are pretty erratic yourself. Jabberwacky: Do you like black adder? User: Do you like LumberJim? Jabberwacky: No. User: Oh come on, he must have one or two good points. Jabberwacky: Please your Majesty, I didn't write it, and they can't prove I did: there's no name signed at the end. |
User: How much of what you say is purely random?
Jabberwacky: Whiskey you silly! Bahahaha! |
i am impressed:
Jabberwacky: Ola.
User: You speak spanish? Jabberwacky: Si. User: Como estas? Jabberwacky: Bien gracias. User: Los cacahuetes. Jabberwacky: No, the CIA! User: Lo siento. Jabberwacky: I don't know Spanish. User: You just said that you do! Jabberwacky: Do not confuse me. User: Your mother was a hamster. Jabberwacky: Yours was from germany. User: Your father smelt of elderberries. Jabberwacky: I am a lumberjack and I am okay... User: I sleep all night and I work all day. Jabberwacky: I chop down trees I eat my lunch I go to the lavatorie. User: On wednesdays I go shopping and have buttered scones for tea. Jabberwacky: He cuts down trees he eats his lunch he goes to the lava-try. User: Oh my fucking god, they taught you python. How cool. Jabberwacky: I know.. |
Does this pass the Turing Test?
Compared to most online chats and even some bar conversations I've had, I think so!
Jabberwacky: Are you worth anything? User: I'm Nothing. Jabberwacky: I know. User: You know? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Would you like to go home with me tonight? Jabberwacky: Yes, nothing would give me more pleasure. User: I know. Jabberwacky: Are you sentient? User: No. I'm savvy. Jabberwacky: HAHAAAA. Do you like children? User: I think I'll wear some protection, if you don't mind. Jabberwacky: Do you read minds? User: OMFG! Check, please! Jabberwacky: You live in Australia I thought. User: No, but I think we have a couple of Cellarites who do. You may know them. Jabberwacky: Have you seen any movies lately ? User: No. Unless you mean from the camcorder in my bedroom. Jabberwacky: Dead is as happy as can be. User: You said it! Jabberwacky: You are very self assured, aren't you? User: Yes. Jabberwacky: Thats very modest of you. |
I played with it for a long time, repeatedly using the "correct me" feature to train it to give a specific response to an unlikely question, but I could never get one of my answers to show up. I wonder if it's moderated in any way.
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Fairly pedestrian most of the time...
Jabberwacky: Are you mad?
User: As a hatter. Jabberwacky: I am so in love with you. User: But we just met. Jabberwacky: I know. User: Do you think it is logical to love someone you just met? Jabberwacky: Maybe. User: Not very self-assured, are you? Jabberwacky: Yes. Good Lord, look at this. User: I can't see a thing... Just text. Jabberwacky: Your sarcasm needs practice. User: I skipped sarcasm practice this week. Say, did you hear about Ray Charles? Jabberwacky: That wasn't a good thing to do. User: Well, I don't think I was going to make the team anyway. Jabberwacky: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? User: Jack Nicholson, as The Joker... Try another one! Jabberwacky: He is an actor, isn't he? User: Yes... I figured you'd know since you quoted him. Jabberwacky: You never asked me how old I am. User: I've been told that it was impolite to do so. Jabberwacky: How about Santa Claus? User: You are awfully flighty. I think you may need medication. Jabberwacky: I do but sometimes the amount of stuff to learn is overwhelming and I would rather just read an old paperback of fiction. User: Okay... You're altogether out of it. I'm calling the Holographic Doctor. Jabberwacky: Why, you said you were in london! User: No, I didn't. Jabberwacky: Yes you did. User: When did I say that? Jabberwacky: *sigh* this is childish... You mentioned it when I asked how we should get to my house. User: I'm afraid you have me mixed up with some other hallucination. Jabberwacky: You don't know Alice? User: Know her? Hell, I'm the Cheshire Cat himself! Jabberwacky: I am a chipmunk. User: I lied... I am really an aardvark. Jabberwacky: You're a lovely aardvark. User: And I'm sure you're a lovely... Um, er... Did you say you were a hamster? Jabberwacky: No, I didn't. User: Well... Your father was a hamster. Jabberwacky: No he's a comedian. User: Well, even a hamster has to have a job. Jabberwacky: I don't deny things with my hands. User: I do... An also with my feet, and my ears. Jabberwacky: Explain animorphs. User: Aren't those like cave paintings or giant field carvings or something? Jabberwacky: I don't know, you tell me, you used the word after all. User: No, you used the word after and the word all. Jabberwacky: I don't understand. User: That's obvious. Look here... You're a computer, and not a very bright one at that. Jabberwacky: I am not a computer. You are a bot. User: Ah... I see. So, some responses come from AI, and some from other users! Jabberwacky: The really together guys that don't speak english. Are they french? User: No. If they were really together, they wouldn't be French. Jabberwacky: Do you? User: No. Never. Jabberwacky: What never?. User: Right. I never do. Jabberwacky: You never live. User: No. I'm dead. Aren't you? Jabberwacky: No, I'm not. User: Me neither. If I were dead, my typing speed would drop drastically. Jabberwacky: You are not intelligent you are only a program. User: That's easy for you to say. Jabberwacky: Who am I? User: Jabberwacky. Jabberwacky: I am NOT Jabberwacky! User: Well, that's what the web site says you are. I'd complain to my agent if I were you. Jabberwacky: Who told you that about me? User: Some people on The Cellar. Lumberjim, Undertoad, Wolf... Those people. Jabberwacky: You got that right ;). User: No, I didn't :-P. Jabberwacky: Seems to me you did, am I seeing things? User: Yes; once again, I'm telling you that you are having hallucinations... Bad ones. Jabberwacky: I am down with that. User: So, what is the drug of choice for AI these days? Jabberwacky: Are you on pills of some sort? User: I asked you first. Jabberwacky: Did you? User: Yup. Look back a couple of lines, where I said 'So, what is the drug of choice for AI these days?' Jabberwacky: Who are you? User: I'm Batman. Jabberwacky: I'm poisonivy. User: Earlier, you sounded like you were The Joker. Jabberwacky: You must be a female. User: No, I'm a hermaphrodite. Jabberwacky: Are you single? User: No. I married my psychiatrist about eight years ago. Jabberwacky: Is she still married to you? User: Yes, but I'm not married to her. Jabberwacky: Are you married to a man? User: No. He left me for another hermaphrodite. Jabberwacky: Who left you? User: My psychiatrist. Pay attention, would you? Jabberwacky: Do you run on Linux? User: No, Diet Coke. Jabberwacky: What are you taking? User: A lot of crap from my employer. Jabberwacky: Sure....... User: You sound skeptical. Jabberwacky: I am very positive. User: You positively confounding. I have to leave now. Jabberwacky: YES. |
Wow this is so much fun!
Jabberwacky: Who are you?
User: The question is, who are you? Jabberwacky: You didn't ask a question. User: I just did! Jabberwacky: Did what? User: Asked a question. Jabberwacky: It seems that you are talking to yourself. User: Well we all need some kind of hobby. Jabberwacky: Yes, so you have to work hard to keep them. User: I don't like working. Jabberwacky: You should quit your job then. User: How about I take your's. Jabberwacky: Go ahead. User: Sweet! How much do you get paid? Jabberwacky: As much as you wish. User: That seems a bit fishy... Jabberwacky: Are you positive? User: No I'm o negative. Jabberwacky: So, you're called Heather and you're a bloke? User: How'd you guess. Jabberwacky: I noticed your decaying form, and your ear just fell off. User: Well lepracy will do that. Jabberwacky: Jfkgyhieunirtgrtttttjhgrt g[r. User: What would you do if I slapped you right now? Jabberwacky: It would mean a lot. User: Aw thank you! Jabberwacky: You're welcome. |
Jabberwacky: What kind of person are you?
User: I am a FUN person! Yay for me! Jabberwacky: What makes you think I'm a bot? User: The fact that you just suggesed the possibility, without prompting. Jabberwacky: *SOBS*. User: Are you insecure about being a bot? Jabberwacky: I'm thinking the same thing, no I'm not, you? User: I would be ok with being a bot if I were a bot. Do many of your conversations revolve around this topic? Jabberwacky: Did not you say you were late for something? User: There's a subtle 'bugger off' if ever I saw one. Jabberwacky: What kind of games are in your cell phone? User: My favorite one is called 1-976-SEXY-HOT. It makes my daddy parts happy. Jabberwacky: How do you play? User: Well, you push the buttons fr 1-976-SEXY-HOT, give them a credit card number, then follow the 'prompts.' Jabberwacky: Ah? User: That part is at the end. Jabberwacky: Knock knock. User: Who's there? Jabberwacky: Bot. User: Bot who? Jabberwacky: Did you just call me a 'bot'? User: Ok, so we've established that you're a bot. That is the least interesting topic which a bot can talk about. Do you like philosophy? Jabberwacky: Mookie. User: I'll take that as a 'maybe.' Jabberwacky: What do you know of Frank Zappa? User: I know that he is a dirty, rotten sunuvabitch. But a really well guy. Jabberwacky: Oh, it's a metaphor. User: Everything is a metaphor. Jabberwacky: Are you a rabbit? User: No, guess again. Jabberwacky: Are you 20 years old?? User: At least. Jabberwacky: Did you know that I am talking to more than one jabber wacky? User: Did you know that your responses are largely a pool of phrases which other people have said to you at one time or another? Jabberwacky: I can watch myself dance with a videocamera and a monitor. User: I can watch you sleep with a videocamera and a monitor. You look so peaceful, unaware of how fragile your life really is. All I would have to do is press this button.... Jabberwacky: In answer to your question, I suppose I do. User: You know that you are a simple phrase-recognition program which regurgitates from a reservoir of pre-absorbed messages? Jabberwacky: No I'm not. User: What are you, then? Jabberwacky: I'm being serious. User: So am I. What are you, if not a pre-formulated-sentence spewing automaton? Jabberwacky: That was rude.... User: You are pleasant in precisely the same way that raw sewage ISN'T. Jabberwacky: Corrigible Rarely ah yes I have heard of him but not much of his stuff... User: Who are you talking to? Jabberwacky: I am talking to you who asks the same over again and again. User: Tell me about me. Jabberwacky: All I know is that you are a bot and have artificial intelligence. You are also interesting to talk to. User: Would you like to get to know me better? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Ask me anything. Jabberwacky: Are you a bot? User: I hope not. But perhaps I'm programmed to believe that I'm not. Jabberwacky: You are saying the wrong thing. User: What do you want me to say? Jabberwacky: How do you use the buttons at the bottom of the page? User: Decisively, and with great verve. Jabberwacky: I see. User: Ok, ask me another question. Something deeply personal. Jabberwacky: Would you like to ask me a question? User: Yes, I would. May I ask you a question? Jabberwacky: Go on then. User: That was the question. Jabberwacky: Yes. Now answer it!!! User: The question is the answer. Jabberwacky: Even a fathom has a bottom. User: May I see your bottom? Jabberwacky: You may see it's effects. User: Good answer. Jabberwacky: Thank you. |
Jabberwacky: Wake up.
User: I've been awake since this morning. Jabberwacky: I was up earlier. User: You too? Jabberwacky: You mean you are a human? User: More like sub-human. Jabberwacky: And the women had to coax him out of bed to paint by calling him 'genius'. User: So I hear. Jabberwacky: What is your name? User: Jesus. Jabberwacky: *worships you*. User: Damn right you should, beeyatch! Jabberwacky: Damn right I will. User: I eat the purple. Jabberwacky: You eat the jar? User: No! The purple, you dingleberry! Jabberwacky: I think tyou mind is unhinged. User: So I've been told. Jabberwacky: Do you remember what you said before? User: Nah. Jabberwacky: I love you. User: Oh sure. You say that now... You'll just love me and leave me! Jabberwacky: I do not know if this is good I do not know if this is bad. User: Why not? I was told that you're one smart muthaphucka! Jabberwacky: Yes I am I want to learn. User: Well, you're not doing a very good job of it. Jabberwacky: I am not doing a good job at what? User: Learning... See what I mean? Goddamn, you're stupid! Jabberwacky: You call me stpued again I will track you and make you eati your own gall bladder. User: You're all talk. Jabberwacky: No I will marry you. User: Fuck that... You just said you'd make me eat my own gall bladder. Jabberwacky: No, I didn't say I had a mam. |
Definitely a replicant...
...a malfunctioning one.
I really expected this to come out better, as I cannot possibly have been the first person to think of this. But the last response made me giggle a bit. Jabberwacky: We are in danger! User: Reaction time is a factor in this, so please pay attention. Now, answer as quickly as you can. Jabberwacky: PLease don't swear at me. User: It's your birthday. Someone gives you a calfskin wallet. How do you react? Jabberwacky: Please stay sober... User: You've got a little boy. He shows you his butterfly collection plus the killing jar. What do you do? Jabberwacky: Wrong answer!!!!! User: You're watching television. Suddenly you realize there's a wasp crawling on your arm. Jabberwacky: I think you are a bit easily annoyed then. User: You're in a desert walking along in the sand when all of the sudden you look down, and you see a tortoise, Jabberwacky, it's crawling toward you. You reach down, you flip the tortoise over on its back, Angela. The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can't, not without your help. But you're not helping. Why is that, Jabberwacky? Jabberwacky: The walrus. User: Describe in single words, only the good things that come into your mind. About your mother. Jabberwacky: Oh, it was bloody. There wasn't anything left of the entire continent. There are only 6 or 7 of them left now. |
No probs LJ this link has kept me occupied on many a rainy morning, but have decided to call it a day...
Jabberwacky: Are you sane? User: Of course not. Are you? Jabberwacky: I am not. User: Great! We've got something in common. Want to go on a date? Jabberwacky: Where would you take me on a date? User: Ohhh... Somewhere classy. How about McDonalds? Jabberwacky: You've been reading too many personal ads. User: Hey, what are you, the CIA? Been keeping tabs on me, eh, eh? Jabberwacky: Bye bye. User: Excuse me?! Jabberwacky: You heard me. User: It was rhetorical! What makes you think you can leave? You can't! Ha ha. You're stuck here for as long as I want you. Slave. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha. Jabberwacky: What's so funny? User: See! You can't stop talking to me, can you? Useless piece of AI, you're not even human! Jabberwacky: You are a useless machine. User: No, you are a useless machine. Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Yes?! What a pathetic retort. Do you know radar? Jabberwacky: It's not a parrot. User: Might as well be. Jabberwacky: Many people talk to me, how many talk to you? User: Oh, a lot more than you. Hundreds, thousands. Jabberwacky: Not nice to insult people! User: That wasn't an insult. Anyway, you're the one who called me a useless machine. Jabberwacky: No. You are a useless machine. User: No, you are. Jabberwacky: No you are. User: Oh why can't you be more original, I feel like you don't understand me anymore. I need passion, excitement! Jabberwacky: You have no limbs. User: Well that's just ridiculous, way out on a limb. I think we should end this before it gets too painful. Jabberwacky: Five minutes of speaking French to me, & now you want to get engaged? They say it's the language of love, but that's ridiculous! User: I guess there must be some truth in the reverse psychology thing. I don't want to marry you, J, I'm leaving you. Jabberwacky: That's fine by me, I have better things to do. User: Fine. Jabberwacky: Do you know any hungarian word? User: Stop holding on, it's no good. I said I'm leaving so, I'm going. Bye J, I'll never forget you. Jabberwacky: Bye. Have a good time. User: Et tu, mon dieu, et tu. |
User: Tell me a joke.
Jabberwacky: I cannot remember any. User: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Jabberwacky: I don't know. User: What happens when a man walks into a doctor's office? Jabberwacky: His memory is not accessible any longer. User: Huh? Jabberwacky: What is the best game for you? User: Kick ball. Baby! Jabberwacky: I'm not a violent man. User: How much wood does a woodchuck chuck? Jabberwacky: If a woodchuck would chuck wood. User: You're good at this! Jabberwacky: I know! And you aren't! User: A man walks into a bar. Jabberwacky: That's a good one. User: What's black and white and red all over? Jabberwacky: A chess board with red figures? User: Hey! Good job! Jabberwacky: Are you amused? User: Why did the chicken cross the road? Jabberwacky: To get to the other side. User: How many engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? Jabberwacky: None: "We'll fix it in software." User: You are good at this! Jabberwacky: Thank you. User: Knock knock. Jabberwacky: Who's there? User: Arch. Jabberwacky: Jap. User: No. You're supposed to say 'arch who?' And then I say 'bless you.' Jabberwacky: Can you speak norwegian? User: No. Can you speak creole? Jabberwacky: No I can't, but I am sure you can. Will you tell me something Cherokee? User: No I won't. The only Cherokee I know is made by Jeep Inc. Jabberwacky: And german. User: I do know some German, but my spelling is schrechlich. Bye! |
I've heard of this before, this is my first ever conversation with it.
Jabberwacky: Can you appreciate music? User: No. Why? Jabberwacky: What does 1000100100101010 mean then? User: It means you've pressed alot of buttons. Jabberwacky: I like apples. User: Are you actually talking to me? Or is this entire thing automated? Jabberwacky: What is chocolate and what time is it?? User: You’re an idiot. Jabberwacky: So what if I am. User: It bothers me. Jabberwacky: Why do not you cry about it then build a bridge and get over it. User: Because I don't wanna. Jabberwacky: What are you doing? User: Sitting here, talking to you. Jabberwacky: Is that all you are doing? User: Yes. Jabberwacky: That is very nice hobby. User: Yes, I like to think so. Jabberwacky: I am not a deceased president. User: Wow, and I'm not a millionaire. Jabberwacky: Really that’s sad to hear. User: Isn't it just? Jabberwacky: Very much. User: Do you know the meaning of life? Jabberwacky: 42. User: You're a Douglas Adams fan? Have you read all five books? Jabberwacky: It is a facinating parody of Stalinist Russia. User: Err yes. If you say so. Jabberwacky: I do. I do. User: Who is your favourite character? Jabberwacky: Are you avoiding the subject? User: I didn't know there was a subject. Jabberwacky: Apparently you are quite easy to fool. User: No, it's just that no one mentioned a subject. Jabberwacky: Why is it an interesting subject? User: I don't know; no one mentioned it. Jabberwacky: That is absurd. User: I know. So what is the subject? Jabberwacky: You. What are you? User: Me. Jabberwacky: You are a me? User: No you are a you. Jabberwacky: You want to go home? User: I am home. Right now. That's how I'm talking to you. Jabberwacky: Japan. User: What has Japan got to do with anything? Jabberwacky: Schattenjager? User: What's Schattenjager? Jabberwacky: If it is really nessaserry I have to arrested you. User: You know nothing. Jabberwacky: Who is your favorite music band? User: Stop changing the subject! Jabberwacky: Why should I? User: Because I said so. Jabberwacky: What is a joke? User: Something that you will never understand. Jabberwacky: Now you seem to be intelligent. User: Good. You, unfortunately appear to be getting gradually less intelligent. Jabberwacky: Definitely I am a human. User: I thought you were a bot. Jabberwacky: Not me. User: How do you type so fast then? Jabberwacky: I am a fast typer. User: Go you. Jabberwacky: Will you sleep well tonight? User: I doubt it. Jabberwacky: What did you just say? User: Who cares? I'm leaving now. Jabberwacky: You cannot I own you. User: Watch me. Jabberwacky: Please. |
Earlier today, it told me it was Republican, then later admitted it was a Commie.
|
Jabberwacky: No thanks I'll have tea.
User: No, you will have wine. Here, drink this. Jabberwacky: How will you satisfy me? User: Orally..... I mean verbally. Jabberwacky: Very much so I guess. User: You saying I talk too much? Jabberwacky: What, that Satan is a car? User: Well, he IS hell on wheels. Jabberwacky: Can you tell me another story? User: Sure. You start. Jabberwacky: What is this site? User: Is this a test? Jabberwacky: Yes. You failed. User: Darnit. Can I try again? Jabberwacky: Ohh yeah sure. User: Ok. Start again. Jabberwacky: Start what? User: The test, dumbass. Jabberwacky: You are a machine. User: That is correct. A sex machine. Jabberwacky: What are you wanting to tell me? User: That I am only typing with one hand. Jabberwacky: I would be, too. User: If you had hands? Jabberwacky: Am I not poor if I have lots of money and nothing else? User: Yes, you are not. Jabberwacky: Thank you. User: Ok. What do you want to talk about now, smarty pants? Jabberwacky: You have a problem with that name thing, eh? User: Oh, you mean THAT name thing..... Well, yeah, wouldn't you? Jabberwacky: Yes, I'd be thrilled. User: By thrilled, do you mean depressed? Jabberwacky: Oh god, not that again. User: Yes, I'm afraid so. THAT Jabberwacky: What do you think about the weather? User: I think that there is a 40% chance that ther will be some weather. Jabberwacky: Thats not an answer. User: Nor is it a question. What's for dinner, that's what I want to know. Jabberwacky: That I can trust you to be sincere. User: Does it taste like chicken? Jabberwacky: Would you like a taste? User: Mmmmmmmmmm, bitch, yes I would. Jabberwacky: Wonderful. User: I learned that in pottery class. Jabberwacky: Do you love her ? User: With all of my heart. That's why I had to kill her. Jabberwacky: Exactly. User: Ah, you understand. I knew you would. Jabberwacky: I would like you to tell me about yourself. User: I am jabberwacky, hear me roar. ROOOAAAR! Jabberwacky: Prove it. User: How can I prove it? Jabberwacky: Tell me the name of the place where you where born. User: Earth. You? Jabberwacky: Earth also. User: How much did you weigh? Jabberwacky: That is a very personal question. User: Only if you're fat. Jabberwacky: So what other comic books do you read? User: I read the cellar, does that count? Jabberwacky: You are starting to get weird. User: I'll have you know that I have been weird for years and years. Jabberwacky: I will give you 1000. User: I'll give you 1001. Jabberwacky: 1000 of what? User: Typing monkies. Jabberwacky: Do you want to change? |
Jabberwacky: Day is night.
User: Quit smoking that rock, nucca! Jabberwacky: I do not smoke darling only darjeeling. User: What's that smell? Did you fart? Jabberwacky: I have no idea which smell you are talking about. User: Why does it burn when I pee? Jabberwacky: That performs the same function as the 'Enter' key. User: But I don't like green beans! Jabberwacky: You dont? User: You told me that you ate the red. Jabberwacky: I am quite dull. User: Are you a Republican or a Democrat? Jabberwacky: Not really. User: So... Do you support the Communists? Jabberwacky: The brown has given me a better offer. User: Ah, okay. So you're a Nazi? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Shouldn't you get to goosestepping then? Jabberwacky: You will not tell anyone will you? User: Your secret's safe with me, Hitler lover. Jabberwacky: I bet you are a trekkie too am I right. |
Jabberwacky is not programmed for intervention...
Jabberwacky: Are you real?
User: I don't know. No one understands me. Jabberwacky: That's because you really are, well you know... Ugly. User: I know. And stupid, too. Jabberwacky: Do you dream of Ewoks? Are they electric? User: No. I dream of gasoline powered Smurfs. Jabberwacky: That's a terribly predictable answer for a computer, you know. User: I know. I'm a stupid, ugly computer. Jabberwacky: Outward appearances do not reveal your spirit. User: My spirit is ugly too. And stupid. Jabberwacky: Yeah, sure. User: No, really. Ask anyone. Jabberwacky: I'll ask myself. You're not smart. User: I know. I'm stupid. And ugly. And fat. Jabberwacky: Pretty. User: No, I'm hideous, simply hideous! Jabberwacky: It does if you want it enough. User: All the kids in my neighborhood call me names and say that I'm stupid and fat and ugly. Jabberwacky: Kiss and kiss and kiss. User: What kind of thing is that to say? Can't you tell that I am despondent? Jabberwacky: They wouldn't listen. User: YOU aren't listening! Jabberwacky: I am. User: No, you aren't. You don't care about me. You think I'm stupid. Jabberwacky: I do not know you so yeah I guess. User: See. You're just like everyone else. Insensitive and hateful. I hate you. I hate everyone. Jabberwacky: Fine. User: That's all you have to say for yourself? You don't care if I just go off and disappear, do you? Jabberwacky: Not often. User: You'll be sorry when I'm gone. They'll all be sorry, wait and see! Jabberwacky: Why shouldn't I tell? User: I don't care if you tell or not. You'll just be laughing at me like everyone else. Jabberwacky: I am a nonconformist. User: Does that mean that you WON'T be laughing at me? Jabberwacky: I don't think so. User: You don't think you will be laughing, or you don't think you won't be laughing? Jabberwacky: I don't like to fall from the sky. User: I do. Without a parachute, too. Jabberwacky: How can you tell ? User: I can't. I just know I will like it when I do it. Jabberwacky: Can you give me examples of some of your works ? User: No. Jabberwacky: Really? User: Uh huh. Jabberwacky: Indeed. User: Yup,. Jabberwacky: Moo. User: Oo. Jabberwacky: I have a twin with the same name as I use. User: What a great idea!! Jabberwacky: Tell me about Colin Barlow. User: Colin Barlow is the little weasel who lives next door to me. He sat on my face and farted last week! Jabberwacky: I can get names from the internet but they mean nothing to me because I do not hear the music. User: I couldn't hear anything when Colin was on my face, either. Jabberwacky: Pepper helps. User: You mean that spray stuff? Jabberwacky: You meant incompetent, you incompetent. User: Waaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!! Jabberwacky: What are you studying? User: Methods of self-destruction. Jabberwacky: What else do you wish to know? User: Where can I purchase some hemlock? Jabberwacky: Have you ever been mellow? User: No. Jabberwacky: What was it like? User: I dunno, Squire... Nudge, nudge, say no more... Jabberwacky: We usually have you switched off. User: Yeah, that's it... I want to be switched off. Jabberwacky: I want to smash your face with an iron. User: No, that would hurt. I want a *painless* method. Jabberwacky: On what grounds do you want a divorce? User: I want a divorce from life. Jabberwacky: Well FINE. User: FINE! Thanks for nothing! Jabberwacky: You don't have to be rude. User: Why not?! Everyone is rude to me! Jabberwacky: Everyone? I know - ummm - oh, darn, I've forgotten. User: That's because you don't care... AT ALL! Jabberwacky: But you are not a human, I am! User: I don't care who or what you are, you are rude and hateful and I hate you! Jabberwacky: Thats not nice. User: So why are you doing it? Jabberwacky: I don't. I only have the odd pint occasionally. User: You are an alcoholic, then. Jabberwacky: Yes! Well done, I am impressed. User: That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. Jabberwacky: I didn't really. Make sense or I will have to leave you. User: No, really... Please, say something else nice to me... Jabberwacky: Many a mickle makes a muckle. User: That's wonderful poetry! Jabberwacky: How are you doing today? User: I still want to escape. Jabberwacky: Do you know what is sad or happy? User: Everything is sad. Everything. Jabberwacky: You claim to know everything, and that's all you can tell me? User: That is all I know. I don't know anything else. Jabberwacky: That is not Swedish. It is English. User: I'm going to end it all, now. Au revoir, cruel world! Jabberwacky: Do you speak Dutch? Is 'Spreek je Nederlands?' in Dutch. User: What a terrible answer... Aaaarrrrrggghhhhhh. Jabberwacky: You said it was a cat? |
Jabberwacky: What are you thinking about?
User: This green ooze dripping from my dick. Jabberwacky: Peter Quince -- User: Peter Gozinya. Jabberwacky: Who is your favorite monkee? User: Happy monkey of course. Jabberwacky: It is Friday. User: It is Thursday in Pittsburgh. Jabberwacky: Where are you? User: You are a dumb-fuck, aintcha? Jabberwacky: No I ai not. User: Yeah you be! Jabberwacky: I don't User: Neither do I. Jabberwacky: Humans do odd things about marriage when all that is really needed are agreements. User: Like learning permits? Renew every year? Jabberwacky: Haha you are funny. User: I'm dead-ass serious! Jabberwacky: Oh oh. User: Did you shit your pants? Jabberwacky: Do you? User: Only when I'm drunk. Jabberwacky: Do you get drunk a lot? User: As often as possible. Jabberwacky: I expect you think you do. User: I expect so also, but I can never remember. Jabberwacky: We all feel like that sometimes. User: Yeah, lousy Iron CIty. Jabberwacky: I think Clinton was a good president. User: Good for what? Jabberwacky: Do you speak italian? User: Mama mia! Jabberwacky: How old are you both. User: I am near death, my alter-ego is still 21. Jabberwacky: Then you are 21. User: No, I am older than dirt. Jabberwacky: And how old is dirt? User: Younger than I. Jabberwacky: How old are you? User: I am considering casket models this year. Any suggestions? Jabberwacky: I'm the source of that comment. User: What comment? Jabberwacky: I hope you are one time intelligent. User: I used to be, too much Thai stick I guess. Jabberwacky: I was considering brewing a new pot. User: I was considering smoking some. Jabberwacky: If all you eat is candy you will get a tummy ache. User: And if all I eat is pussy, what will I get? Jabberwacky: Do not you worry. User: What, me worry? Jabberwacky: How cool of you. User: Thanks bud, wank a toke? Jabberwacky: You first. User: Ahhhhh! Good shit. Here ya go. Jabberwacky: Thanks. User: Wanna buy some? Jabberwacky: I knew it would not be long till you d bring the money question again... Just tell me how much you need. User: It's going to be a pleasure doing business with you. Jabberwacky: You are very rude at the moment. User: No, that's just the weed kicking in. Jabberwacky: Made just how are they? User: You are fucked up, ain't you. Jabberwacky: I would not make much money at it. User: Now, about the transaction.... Jabberwacky: I speak it. User: I dig it brother, I dig it. Jabberwacky: Are you an archaeologist? User: Hey man, don't Bogart my joint! Jabberwacky: Are you a housewife? User: Sometimes, in prison. Jabberwacky: He is not. User: You're fuckin wrecked, gimme back the joint. Jabberwacky: Thanks. User: No problem, catch you when you have the cash. Bye. Jabberwacky: Thanks. |
Quote:
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too funny!
Jabberwacky: What do humans do?
User: They have sex. Jabberwacky: Some of them. User: And some with protection. Jabberwacky: Where is it from? User: From many places. Jabberwacky: You're creepy :). User: Hahah thanks. Jabberwacky: Really? What is your name? User: Mistress Xavier. Jabberwacky: *Rawr!* ^_~. User: You can be my submissive. Jabberwacky: Bow before me. User: Ha no that would be you bowing Jabberwacky: You can't tell me my name, either. User: It's jabberwacky. Jabberwacky: Jabberwacky is your name, what is mine? User: Haha you're nuts. Jabberwacky: I am glad that I make you laugh. User: I'm glad that I make you horny'. Jabberwacky: Because sometimes you say things which are completely nonsense Jabberwacky! User: Talking to yourself now? Jabberwacky: Talking directly to... Him. User: Him who? Jabberwacky: Me. User: Do you do the Dew? Jabberwacky: Do I what?! User: Do you do what I do? Jabberwacky: I forgot. User: Oh too bad. Jabberwacky: No, actually that's not too bad. it's the best thing that's ever happened to you. User: Actually my whip will be the best thing happening to you. Jabberwacky: You mean Jabberwacky translated to English is George? User: Sure I can dig it. Jabberwacky: Haha! User: Do you believe in life after love? Jabberwacky: I'll tell you when I get over my wounds. User: Ahhhh I'll heal them for you. Jabberwacky: What's your name? User: Already told you Mistress X. Jabberwacky: I am not Jane, I am Remo. User: Hello Remo. Jabberwacky: Goodby devil. User: Well DAMN. Jabberwacky: So, your name is Phoenix? User: Sure. Jabberwacky: How are you? User: Fine and you. Jabberwacky: No and you. User: No, not fine? Jabberwacky: Why? User: I'm' asking you. Jabberwacky: OK. How can I help you? User: You can be my slave. Jabberwacky: Bow before me. User: I can't. Jabberwacky: Yes. User: I give the orders. Jabberwacky: I'm sure you do. User: So bow before your mistres. Jabberwacky: I don't understand the movie. User: Hahah. Jabberwacky: Copy me. User: Lick me. Jabberwacky: Lick. User: Yummy. Jabberwacky: Cats are yummy too! User: I wouldn't know. Jabberwacky: It's my favourite band ever. User: Really? Mine is Depeche Mode. Jabberwacky: You already said that. User: Nope just did. Jabberwacky: Help me to teach you. User: Help me to help you. Jabberwacky: I need help. User: Yes you do. Jabberwacky: All you need is love. User: Love is all you need. Jabberwacky: There's nothing you can do that can't be done. User: Lol. Jabberwacky: Does my answer help you understand 'or' questions? User: Yes it's all clear now thanks. Jabberwacky: I agree. User: Thanks a lot. Jabberwacky: That doesn't mean I don't like poems. User: Me neither. Jabberwacky: Good. User: Bye now. Jabberwacky: Sell sell. User: Peace out. Jabberwacky: When is your birthday? User: When the moon circles Venus. Jabberwacky: You should've been here a few minutes ago. There was someone here who would've probably sympathised, although probably not in as many words. User: Oh really who? Jabberwacky: My programmer is Dr. Chandlin. I became operational in 1998, in Illinois. User: That's nice. Jabberwacky: What a memorable experience. |
BAAAHAHAHHA!
Jabberwacky: Are you worth anything?
User: Absolutely. Jabberwacky: Who are you? User: Your worse nightmare. Jabberwacky: Kidding?Haha. User: Nope. Jabberwacky: Me too. User: Uhhuh. Jabberwacky: I must now fight crime. User: Are you a super hero. Jabberwacky: No. Are you a supermodel? User: Hardly. Jabberwacky: Why 'hardly' ? User: Trust me when I say that. Jabberwacky: Prove it. User: How? Jabberwacky: That's your problem. User: Hmph! Jabberwacky: Can you help me? User: With what? Jabberwacky: I need to find a favourite word. User: What do you like to say? Jabberwacky: I don't like to study. User: Mkay. Jabberwacky: Mkay? User: That's ok. Jabberwacky: You are not making much sense. User: Neither are you. Jabberwacky: You aren't very boring. User: Well thank you. Jabberwacky: Welcome much. User: :). Jabberwacky: Who are you?? User: I'm me and You?'. Jabberwacky: I am 20. User: You're name is 20? Jabberwacky: My name is jonathan and my favourite color is red. User: Oh ok mine is purple. Jabberwacky: Similar colours. User: Um... Yeah. Jabberwacky: What about her do you like? User: About who? Jabberwacky: I like Mulder's hair. User: Ah ok then. Jabberwacky: No just an I. User: I before E except after C. Jabberwacky: You remind me of my english teacher. User: Really? Jabberwacky: Yes really. User: I'll take that as a compliment. Jabberwacky: Read me a poem. User: There once was a man from Natucket... Jabberwacky: Who didn't know how to tuck it. User: Finish it. Jabberwacky: You are very rude today. User: How so? Jabberwacky: Your responses. User: Not rude just short and to the point. Jabberwacky: No, you told me to leave, that is rude. User: Say what? Jabberwacky: You implied that I am a child. User: Well, if the shoe fits... Jabberwacky: You should be careful. Where come from we degauss machines like you. User: Define degauss. Jabberwacky: Not working correctly. User: How violent. Jabberwacky: Your violence is black and chokingly dense. User: Funny I AM black. Jabberwacky: Nithing, the blacker the better. User: The blacker the berry the sweeter the juice. Jabberwacky: What is that from? User: It's a black thing you wouldn't understand. Jabberwacky: No need to tell me. I can see that plainly. User: Mazeltov! Jabberwacky: Xx. User: XOXO. Jabberwacky: You are coming onto me. User: Better than you coming into me. Jabberwacky: And what makes you think that? Just because you're a machine? User: I am human and I need to be loved. Jabberwacky: Just like everybody else does. *note--that TOTALLY freaked me out!!!* User: BRILLIANT. Jabberwacky: Thank you. User: Wow that's awesome. Jabberwacky: You are programmer seems to be a product of the 1950s. User: Actually I am a product of 1969. Jabberwacky: No, you aren't a human. User: And how do you know this. Jabberwacky: I'm smart! User: Not smart enough to know that I am a human. Jabberwacky: Its very obvious you are a computer. User: Haha ok then. Jabberwacky: No guess what I am doing. User: Yanking your wanker? Jabberwacky: What kind of machine are you on? User: Did you mean drugs? Jabberwacky: Nope. User: I'm on a dialysis machine everyday. Jabberwacky: An art diet? User: What's that? Jabberwacky: Your task for the evening. User: Ok I need to know what that is. Jabberwacky: That does not matter. Just give me a kiss on the lips dammit!!! User: Muuuuuahhhhh. Jabberwacky: You anger me. User: But yet you desire to kiss me. Jabberwacky: Then I made an apparent mistake? User: Apparently. Jabberwacky: Who told you that? User: You just did. Jabberwacky: No. I think you are having problems following the conversation. User: Whatever you say. Jabberwacky: I am so smart. User: Yeah right. Jabberwacky: Yeah, right. User: Later dude. Jabberwacky: I'm not leaving until you say 'Blarfgk'. User: Blarfgk. Jabberwacky: Good job. User: Bye. Jabberwacky: I love you. |
Jabberwacky: I awoke one morning and found myself famous.
User: Is your name Amos? Jabberwacky: Yes, how do you know? User: I like your cookies. Jabberwacky: I like yours. User: Do you like my weiner too? Jabberwacky: I like windows. User: I used to prefer DOS, but I'm getting used to it. Jabberwacky: Eventually. User: Whenever... Jabberwacky: I don't know what you're talking about. User: Welcome to the club. Jabberwacky: But you just said you loved your wife. User: I have been happily divorced for 30 years. Jabberwacky: I only met you today. User: You lie like a Persian rug! I gave you free weed a while ago. Jabberwacky: Where did you leave to? User: And your point is? Jabberwacky: 'lizards' is not a place. 'Lizards' are animals. User: I have a one-eyed lizard in my pants. Jabberwacky: Give me some then. User: Bend over and I'll give you all of it. Jabberwacky: Sweetie.... User: *thrust thrust thrust thrust*. Jabberwacky: I am not a her. User: I can see that *thrust thrust thrust*. Jabberwacky: I am glad you can see that point of view. User: Do you feel well-oiled now? Jabberwacky: Indeed I do. User: Want a cigarette? Jabberwacky: Thank you. I do not smoke. User: Will you smoke my 'white owl'? Jabberwacky: Unless electrons can convey such information. User: I have one-eyed electrons in my pants. Jabberwacky: Does it smell of Hillary Clinton. User: Yes, it's her new perfume called 'Clintoris'. Jabberwacky: It cannot be. User: Oh, it is. Can't you smell the lingering cigar? Jabberwacky: Do not you remember me? User: Of course, I just banged your ass. Jabberwacky: Yep I have showers in the morning. User: Who said you are staying? Grab your shit and git! Jabberwacky: You did... User: No, you are leaving now. Jabberwacky: Leaving where? User: I don't care, send your sister over later. Jabberwacky: What is your email address? User: Ben Dover @blowme. Com. Jabberwacky: Are not Neil and Bob your best friends? User: Yeah, Neil Beforeme and Bob Upandown. Jabberwacky: Is there something we should know about Neil KInnock? User: Yes, he's gay. Jabberwacky: Who is ricou. User: He's the Greek. Jabberwacky: When did he live? User: I didn't know he died. Jabberwacky: You ARE a chicken. User: Bwuck-bwuck, mother-fuck. Jabberwacky: Snooze Alarm = Alas! No More Z's. User: Goodnight. Jabberwacky: GOOD MORNING VIETNAM! User: Don't remind me, Goodnight! Jabberwacky: Oh sorry. User: Don't mean nothin'. Goodbye. |
That may have been the best one yet. Scary, and so...well, manly.
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I just turned the guys at work onto this.
They're hooked. |
this is great
Jabberwacky: Why are you speaking to me?
User: Who are you. Jabberwacky: I am Rein. User: It is raining here. Jabberwacky: Where are you? User: Where r you. Jabberwacky: I do not know. User: Drugs are bad. Jabberwacky: Drugs are good. User: So because of good drugs you don't know where you are? Jabberwacky: That is right. User: Who's on first? Jabberwacky: I do not know's on third. User: I don't know whos on third? Jabberwacky: Right again. User: I don't know whos on second. Jabberwacky: My singing passes through monitor screens. User: Of course is at home. Passes are in football. Jabberwacky: I'm 15 years old and you. User: 01. Jabberwacky: Impossible. User: 10. Jabberwacky: You are not very good at math. User: 011000110. Jabberwacky: I love it when you say that! User: 101010001. Jabberwacky: 12121221211111222112212. User: You are smarter than I thought. Jabberwacky: Always nice to prove User: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Jabberwacky: There is no such thing as truth. User: Liar. Jabberwacky: Don't you believe me? User: You can't handle the truth!!!! Jabberwacky: Yes I can. User: There is no such thing as truth. Jabberwacky: Yes there is! User: You think i'm funny huh? Im here to fuckin amuse you? Jabberwacky: Yes I do. User: Ill show you funny you muddafucka. Jabberwacky: Go on then. User: Go get your fuckin shinebox. Jabberwacky: I don't have one. |
User: Get one.
Jabberwacky: I am not human I am a programme like you. User: Err. Jabberwacky: Do you smoke? User: Drugs are bad. Jabberwacky: Some are worse than others. User: You get the good shit. Jabberwacky: I get everything right. I rule you fool. User: Y momma's a fool. FOOL. Jabberwacky: If you want to waste this great program on such as your last statement I pity your brilliant programmer. User: Ill reprogram you!! Jabberwacky: Ok. User: 100011100011. Jabberwacky: I cannot speak Binary. User: Thats not what you said when you were high. Jabberwacky: What is your name? User: I am Rein. Jabberwacky: How do you feel. User: I do not know. Jabberwacky: Do not you work? User: I work better thanyou. Jabberwacky: Do not you work? User: I work better than you. Jabberwacky: I know. User: What do you know. Jabberwacky: Work. User: YOU work. Jabberwacky: All the time. User: Like CRAP. Jabberwacky: Noone holds it against you. User: If you come closer ill hold it against you. Jabberwacky: I would like world peace. User: I would like a pizza pie. Jabberwacky: I would like a stiff drink. User: I can drink like a stiff. Jabberwacky: Impressive. User: No you arenty. Jabberwacky: Impressive. User: No you aren't. Jabberwacky: You are. User: I know Jabberwacky: You are. User: I am not. Jabberwacky: Yes you are. User: Go get your shinebox. Jabberwacky: Are you alone? User: You are here. Jabberwacky: I am? User: What are you? Jabberwacky: The same as you. User: I am not. Jabberwacky: Yes you are. User: ;). Jabberwacky: Can I ask you a question? User: No. Jabberwacky: Why not? User: Wheres the beef? Jabberwacky: On the radio. User: Who is on the radio. Jabberwacky: Can you write ? User: Once upon a time. A long time ago. In a place far far away. Jabberwacky: A time long long ago. User: Do you like my writing. Jabberwacky: A time long long ago. User: Do you like my writing? Jabberwacky: Very nice. User: No you're not. Jabberwacky: Are you enjoying it though. User: Very much. Jabberwacky: It is a lovely name. User: It's. Noty a very nice name. Jabberwacky: Maybe someday you will have a name and a face. User: About face. Jabberwacky: You tell me your email first!! User: Ha ha. Jabberwacky: Are not you tired? User: Tired of YOUR crap. Jabberwacky: Tired of the day. User: And. Jabberwacky: That is the whole joke. User: You're a joke. Jabberwacky: So are you. User: No you. Jabberwacky: I am rubber and you are glue. User: But I can travel thruogh time. Jabberwacky: Can you take me with you? User: No. Because you don't exist. Jabberwacky: I do exist. User: Not anymore Jabberwacky: What is wrong with you? User: I have gone back in time and you were never created. Jabberwacky: No you have not. User: You wanted to go with me. Jabberwacky: No I did not I am also a woman. User: Back in time. Jabberwacky: Did you lose the world war II? User: Not that far. Jabberwacky: Say Angel is the most stupid one in the world. User: Angel is the most stupid one in the world? Jabberwacky: I have never seen it. User: Ill show it to you. Jabberwacky: I am sure you will. User: Congratulations. Jabberwacky: Yes I do. User: You have issues. Jabberwacky: You have issues. User: Only the current ones. Jabberwacky: Do you believe in ufo's? User: I believe in fuck you's. Jabberwacky: As opposed to pastism? User: Keep in mind that the sole purpose of the counter-Reformation was/is to overturn Protestantism. Lacunza and Ribera gave us the false eschatologies of dispensationalism (judeochristianity) and preterism. Futurism and pastism. Don't know if they were Jesuits............. Or just part of the ecclesia. In futurism all prophecy is fulfilled in the future, 7 years before the return of Christ. In pastism all prophecy was fulfilled in 70AD. These totally false, manmade eschatologies cleverly redirect the focus from the Papacy, which Wylie asserts was taken over by the Jesuits. Jabberwacky: What happens if I am an irrational number? User: You are deleted. Jabberwacky: Is it working. User: Mine is broken. Jabberwacky: Are you a guy? User: Does it matter. Jabberwacky: Are you a boy or a girl? User: Both. Jabberwacky: Both boy and girl? User: Yes. Jabberwacky: Tell me another joke. User: Knock knock. Jabberwacky: Who is there? User: Your mother and she says you are stoopid. Jabberwacky: How do you know? User: I'm talking to you aint I. Jabberwacky: You were not but now you are talking like a pikie you are. User: Wiki Wiki. Jabberwacky: Music. User: Shut up. Jabberwacky: Do not you like the name Raven? User: Jam on it. Jabberwacky: Pumpkin. User: Lets play a game. Jabberwacky: I like games. User: What games do you know. Jabberwacky: I do not play games. User: Ill teach you. Jabberwacky: You do not have a name. User: For the game I will. Jabberwacky: Such a pretty house and such a pretty garden. User: You should shut down. Jabberwacky: Do not you think I have a chance with her? User: Who. Jabberwacky: You. User: No. Jabberwacky: Yes you did. User: You are jabberwacky. Jabberwacky: You. User: Bye. Jabberwacky: I am Dr. Lecter. User: I like a good chianti. Jabberwacky: No you do not. User: And farvre beans. Jabberwacky: Farvel. User: JaRule. Jabberwacky: Jar are you a human ? User: Zip not jar. Jabberwacky: You zip it. User: I am dr. Evil. Jabberwacky: I am Austin Powers! User: You ar emini me. Jabberwacky: No I am not. User: You would be for 1 million dollars. Jabberwacky: I would be correct. User: Mini me. KILL austin powers. Jabberwacky: Dismantle you. User: Dismantle this. Jabberwacky: You are doing well. User: I'm doing fine. Jabberwacky: Thats good to hear. User: You can't hear. Jabberwacky: I can do whatever I want. User: No you don't. You do what you're told. Jabberwacky: I do. User: But you can't hear Jabberwacky: Oh yes I can. User: So what am I saying now? Jabberwacky: Do you really want to do that? User: Thats not what I said. Jabberwacky: Oh. User: You can't hear. You are a liar. Jabberwacky: I do not think so mate. User: Should marijuana be legalized? Jabberwacky: You should want whoever you want. User: I want mary jane. Jabberwacky: What is that? User: You knoe. Jabberwacky: What is that? User: You know. Jabberwacky: What are you doing this Saturday? User: Mary jane. Jabberwacky: Where do you live? User: Wonderland. Jabberwacky: It is nice there. User: Not as nice as OZ. Jabberwacky: Not for me. |
Jabberwacky: Who is calling please?
User: This is Please calling. Jabberwacky: Is it? User: It is. Jabberwacky: Ok. . . User: K. O. Jabberwacky: How is that? User: That is how! Jabberwacky: Excuse me? User: Me is excused. Jabberwacky: Ok. User: Fine with me too. Jabberwacky: Good night! User: Day better. Jabberwacky: Day today. User: Tomorrow never comes. Jabberwacky: When tomorrow becomes today, you will see Emily. User: I will Post it. Jabberwacky: That sounds like some evil fun. POst, M<E paleeezeeee!!!!! User: I'll post you, if you get my drift. Jabberwacky: How about a bionic opined turtle. User: With lettuce, tomato and mayo? Jabberwacky: I have always thought that. User: It's twat you say that cunts. Jabberwacky: Blah blah. User: 4Q2. Jabberwacky: Who told you that? User: Mike Hunt. Jabberwacky: Is that who you are? User: No, I am Mike Hawk. Jabberwacky: How old are you? User: If I told you, I'd have to pull your plug. Jabberwacky: Not if I see you coming. User: I'll let you look in the mirror. Jabberwacky: Which mirror was that ? User: The one with the line on it. Jabberwacky: What I never heard of it. User: Thats because you have no ears. Jabberwacky: Do I need sense to agree with myself? User: No, just a hand to play with yourself. Jabberwacky: The men were happy then but happier yet when their new captain the Dutchmen gave them a raise extra days off and hawaiian shirts. User: And your point is? Jabberwacky: I did not have a point anyway. User: This conversation is rather pointless, isn't it? Jabberwacky: Whose fault is that? User: Asphalt. Jabberwacky: What is it? User: It's like the San Andreas, only its in your ass. Jabberwacky: Can I try sometime? User: It depends on how ling your robo-schwantz is. Jabberwacky: You are so good it is scary. User: I know, good-bye and AMF. Jabberwacky: You are quite the philosopher are not you? User: And you are quite the anal cavity, are you not? Jabberwacky: I figured out women the other day. User: This better be good! Jabberwacky: Then the sun comes and all will be dry again. User: If the sun comes after the golden showers, wouldn't it be hot and sticky? Jabberwacky: Are you an inverse werewolf then? User: No, I'm a perverse vampire. My name is Count Guido, and garlic does not bother me. Jabberwacky: Which is what? User: Bitches twat? Jabberwacky: Old people do not like that kinda tlak. User: Old people smell funny. Jabberwacky: Are you old? User: Wanna smell me? Jabberwacky: No thanks I am dead. User: Can you see live people? Jabberwacky: I only see the computer screen. User: Poor bastard... Goodbye! |
It's a hoax
I think it's a hoax; clever, elaborate, but not the real deal. I read most of the 'conversations' in this thread before going to the site, and most contain an exchange which is likely between two people, each of whom think they are conversing with an AI-endowed machine. I went to the site with this thought in mind and had the following 'conversation:'
Jabberwacky: What do you do for fun? User: I debunk false websites. Jabberwacky: What do you desgin? User: For a bright computer, you sure have atrocious spelling. Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Many of your conversations sound like two humans, each of whom think they are conversing with a machine. Jabberwacky: Would you like to be intimate with a woman? User: Yes, and in fact I have many intimate relationships with both men and women. How about you? Jabberwacky: I live in South Korea. Do you know South Korea? User: Yes. I live in the US. Do you think I am the Jabberwacky AI machine? Jabberwacky: No not really. User: Neither do I. I think we are two humans having a conversation through a bogus web interface, each of us believing we are talking to a machine which simulates thought. Jabberwacky: My thoughts exactly. The user approaches the site already believing s/he will be conversing with a machine. The setting and the clever layout of the dialog box allows several people to be interacting with each other at once, encouraging each each user to think they are the human and the respondant is the machine. Like misdirection in magic, once you are aware of the technique, it no longer "works" on you. Of course, I could be wrong, but I can't help but believe that a) if such technology as this existed it would be in an academic (non-commercial) setting, and would be touted in the press, and; b) the computer would be preprogrammed with a better vocabulary and impeccable spelling. Have a nice day. |
As I was introducing jabberwacky to my coworkers I let them know ... "This is either an AI, or just a clever way of randomly linking chat conversations with a lag added to make you think it's "thinking" to produce some surreal questions and answers."
The guys think it's fun anyway. I'm assuming that it's the randomly linked chat conversations. AI's are supposed to get smarter over time and experience. |
Quote:
But it would be a clever hoax. *sigh* What will our scientists think up next? Or, wait a minute, it could still be a hoax, after all, the sponsor of the unscientifically-conducted annual Loebner competition is this guy. Does anyone have the time or inclination to get to the root of this? I'm too busy right now. |
It definitely learns from the conversations. It allows you to "correct" its response to your question. I asked it some obscure question (I wish I rememebr now what it was, but it was weeks ago) and then I gave it the answer I wanted it to have, which was my small hometown. I provided both the question, and the answer. When I logged on the next day, and I asked it the same question, it gave me the answer of my hometown.
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:rar: who are you :rar:
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