Shitting at Work
 

How (where) do you approach this controversial activity?

I must be weird, because I don't have this seemingly endless fascination with bathroom threads. But, to answer your question . . .

The men's restroom.

It was pretty much a daily routine, usually just before I started work at 8. No uncomfortable-ness.

I use the handi stalls whenever they're open. Tend to be cleaner. Also would sneak into the faculty restrooms in high school so I didn't have to sit on the cigarette-burned student toilet seats.

I dont have a problem crapping in the female toilets anywhere, anytime.

It seems thats not quite normal, my friends wait until they are at their own home toilet.

I'm also quite fond of blaming whoever used the toilet before me for my stench :)

Toilet, portapotty, tree, plastic bag, anywhere, any time, baby!

A helicopter flew over me about 70 ft off the deck as I was poppin a squat behind a bush while working a wildfire this summer.

Although I do actually make sure there is a toilet involved I do go anywhere, anytime.

No special preparations needed. We have three different kinds of freshener spray and a fan in the office bathroom (single user). Everybody knows that if the fan's still running, you enter at your own risk.

Three of my coworkers sneak upstairs to poop.

I'll only do that if it's time to retire and the CEO's desk is involved.

i work 14 hour days. you do the math

Any time any where ,

When I was sailing up the inland passage to Alaska about 30 years ago I was taking a dump off the side of our boat when we hit a squall. It was November and my pants filled with sleet/hail in seconds. As I was trying to scoop, bail and wipe with soggy TP, we rounded an island as a cruise ship passed us in the other direction, everyone got a nice look. My buddies were howling with laughter.

That was YOU??? My aunt and uncle were on that cruise and she hasn't been right since!! ;)

You insensitive sods, my aunt and uncle were pooping out of the window of the WTC on 9/11 when a plane full of tourists.....

If I do the 2 at work its usually early. Unless something wasn't right last night in which case, abandon hope all ye who enter the room of men.

I always use the handicap stall. I don't care. As with handicap parking spaces, there are 10x more stalls/spaces than actual handicappers so I don't consider myself a squatter.

I like the wide open vistas one gets in the handicap stalls. The big door, the private sink, etc. I like being able to spread out and not be cramped while attending to the task at hand.

Having said that, however, there is one thing that I have no tolerance for in modern, commercial bathrooms. This belongs in the "Whatever happened to..." thread but I'll post it here also. What the hell happened to toilets that you actually flush yourself? What is up with this newfangled, electronic, infrared, heat-seeking, big-brother, automatic "I'll Flush For You" bullshit?

Excuse me but if I can do everything leading up to that point, I think I can pretty much finish the freakin' job without some doofus electro-toilet sending 12 ounces of water to do 72 ounces of water's job.

So, I am left with the job of pushing some unresponsive rubber button countless times to compensate for the fact that the water is gone long before the job is done. Then, in a final act of passive-aggressive defiance, the toilet flushes itslef one last time as I exit the stall as if to say in its finest Pee Wee Herman voice: "I can do that."

Uhh, I have news for you, toilet. No, you can't.

I don't like magic toilet either. Magic sink is pretty lame, because the water never gets to the right temperature, no matter how long you try to prime it before actually washing. Magic soap dispenser only gives out 1/4 the amount of soap you need.

Magic paper towel machine rules, just so long as it has enough towels and battery power. But sometimes it tries to give paper to the ghost that walks through the bathroom. Very disconcerting, especially when you are well out of the sensor's range.