Off to Greener Pastures
 

I'm not quite sure where to put this, but since this used to be 'home' for me, I'm thinking home base pretty much does it.

I've been giving a great deal of thought to the Cellar, what it was, what it has become, and where it's heading, and my place in all of it. I've also examined my frustration level with some of the things going on around here, and have decided that it's time to head off to different places.

Have I enjoyed my time here? Yep. I've met a number of people that I would consider friends. I've learned a lot from those people, and even more from the people whom I've banged heads with. (Some of those I would even consider friends.) That said, the last few months have been tough to watch, much less participate in. I don't know what's going on, but a place that I used to consider home is now hostile. A place that was fun, is now frustrating. Do I blame it on the 'new folks'? Not entirely - I was new here once, getting my feet wet, making mistakes, and having arguments with the then old timers. Do I blame it on the 'old guard'? Not entirely - I know what it's like to feel like you need to fiercely defend a place you know and love. I've found myself doing the same thing over the past few weeks - a lot of times, I delete posts before I even post them, because it's just not worth the emotional energy that it requires. I don't know what's in the air, but whatever it is, is not blowing over.

Will I come back? I don't know. I'm fairly certain that the Cellar is an addiction that there's not a 12 step program for, so I may lurk and read from time to time (Sorry LJ, I know lurkers chap your goat) I'm not burning bridges, because as I stated, this is a place that I consider 'home', but I doubt I'll post again. The Cellar is full of fond memories of times passed, of people that are interesting, and stimulating, some are still here, some are long gone. I'll miss them all. But the bickering, and infighting, insults, and garbage - I won't miss. I won't miss the 'all inclusive' statements, stereotypes of any vein, and bigoted statements that simply aren't necessary, but are accepted or even encouraged by some of the people who now call this place home.

Is this because of the ice cream drama? Nah, although that was the impetus to make a final decision. This is something that's been brewing, and now that the kettle is screaming, it's time to go take care of it.

UT, thanks for creating a great place for people to come together and throw thoughts into the pile, hash things out, and generally have intelligent and insightful discussions. This is most definitely a unique place on the Innernets, and one that I think has contributed positively to a number of folks over the years.

It's been a great few years. I'll send postcards from wherever I land.

Take care of yourselves.

Kellie (kellie@brabec.com)

:shock:

:speechless:

Dags, I'm sorry you feel that way about the Cellar, and I hope you'll come back eventually. I love ya to death, and actually, I feel kinda bad that we haven't talked much since you headed south. I haven't been around much here lately, but based on some recent remarks I've seen, it's been a bit ugly...it was actually getting a bit ugly before I went on thesis hiatus.

One thing I've learned over the past 6 years on the Cellar is that it's like the weather in St. Louis or Philadelphia: If you don't like it at the moment, stick around for a bit or come back later, because it will make some crazy changes. When I came back full-time a few months ago, I was surprised at how much "turnover" had occurred, yet it wasn't hard to get back into the mix at all.

I've said before that this is just a fucking message board. On the surface, of course, that's true. But it can become really more than that. And if it does become more than that to you (it has to me), people can irritate the shit out of you here just as much as they do IRL.

But given that there is still a fair level of anonymity here, some people tend to mouth off more than they ever would IRL, because there are no real repercussions per se. All you can do is roll with the punches, and try not to let people get you down...just like IRL. And know that the Cellar will be a different place in a short matter of time.

So...don't leave. Or at the very least, just go on a sabbatical and come back. A lot of us will still be here if you do.

My $0.06.

it was the asscheeks joke wasnt it?

Honestly sorry to see you go Dagney.
You're of a different vintage to me, but I always read your posts with interest knowing they will be interesting and I will usually agree with them- where I don't I acknowledge they are balanced and intelligent.

I hope this place levels out - hell, it's had ups and downs before - and we see you back.

:sniff: Well Dag,
I have to say, you were posting when I was still a lurker. Something I did for nearly a year. Mostly I was looking at the Pic of the day. Then about six months in I started reading the comments. Then I started browsing other forums. Your name was one I started to associate quick with good posts.
Once I started posting here I let some of the things I read and peoples additudes get to me too. I spent most of the start of this year just looking at the pic of the day again and only occasionaly skimming the forums. The cellar easliy becomes more than just a jumped up BBS. however much like hanging out too often with friends or even family bullshit can get overtaxing. The choice of course is yours, but you will be missed and looked for to return. I'm sure UT won't mind if I overstep a simple posters place and say you'll always be welcome around here.:sniff: :cry:

My apologies. I feel I am the bullseye.
So again, my apologies.

Dagney, I will miss your posts. You always seem to have a reasonable take on things. But you know what the cellar is like.....you've seen it go through ups and downs before, most of us have. As my mum always says, it will all come out in the wash....things will settle down. Keep your eye on us and I hope one day you'll feel comfortable posting again.

I get what you're saying Dagney. The place really lacks something right now. Syc makes a good point though, pop in later and see if things haven't improved. take care g

Oh, boy. An "I'm leaving" thread.

it's called a suicide note.

No, it's an I'm going on vacation note.

ARE there actually pastures greener than here?

Some people drift off, while other people post an angry "I'm outta here!" message; Dag is thoughtful (as usual) and finds a middle ground.

I say, another middle ground is just stopping in once in a while, or picking one section and sticking to that, or enjoying a few subscribed threads, or even just going to read-only mode once in a while. You don't have to be a serious read-everything sort to be a Dwellar.

The grass is always greener over the septic tank.