I can't do this anymore
 

I can't I can't I can't.

No matter what I keep getting hit with more, while listening in staff meeting to how caught up everyone is so they read through our procedures and found some things that need fixed. OH GOOD GOLLY THANKS FOR DOING THAT.

I can't even see straight right now...there's so much in front of me and EVERYONE is calling about these emails and I'm getting it from all sides.

Why don't they just fucking kill me? I can't fucking do it all. But everytime I think I'm getting somewhere there's more.

While, again, I listen in staff meeting about how someone with one fucking thing to do is so caught up and wow do they work hard.

I'm not going to make it. I am not going to fucking get through this. I. Am. Not.

Leave. Either sick for the day, or permanently. No job is worth the distress you are going through.

Sent by thought transference

Yes. You will.

Do it for spite.

Also, try not to take on their expectations. If your day isn;t long enough to do the work they think you shold do, just do the work the day is long enough for. Let them shout and hollah and send shitty stressy emails. You have a day and you have a certain amount of work you can fit into it. End of story.

did you get the song I emailed you a few weeks ago? You should give it a listen

Shaw, I gotta think Limey is right. NOT worth that kind of stress.

Thanks guys. I'm trying so hard. I don't see why no one gets it. Besides my friends. ;)

Jebus I'm sick of my stomach roiling. But I can't just quit. I will lose so much money...not just wages but my 200 hours of vacation they have to pay me when I leave (unless I walk out) and any chance to get unemployment.

I would end up cashing in my pubic (sic....on purpose) employees retirement but it has to be 3 months since termination.

I am seriously losing it. I thought I could do this. But it keeps getting worse and worse. And I am trying, I am trying so fucking hard. Have I mentioned how hard I am trying.

I'm fucked.

go home sick.go to the doc, get another note. do what you have to to get out of there today.

tmorrow's another POS you can deal with after you get a break today



then take the owed vacation every tuesday and thursday til it's used up. it's no good to you banked. tell them you're taking it or they better pay you for it, then you can leave.

You're not fucked.

You just need to do the work you can do in the next few hours, and then go home for the day. You don't have to do it all right now.

Everyone is calling you? Just answer the phone and talk to them one at a time. They are giving you more work? Fine. Just add it to the pile. You'll get to it when you get to it. And you won't be rushing. Just focus on the work you need to do for the next several hours until quitting time.

Do you speak up in these meetings?

I like Monster's plan.

Sent by thought transference

I do speak up. I've been speaking up, over and over, to every tom, dick, and consultant they've brought in since the Reign of Terror ended. I try to explain calmly that they have me spread too thin. The attitude I get back is that I'm not trying hard enough. And if you're really dumb (smart) you can do one or two things and spread them out through the day and get praised for being so on the ball.

Right now I can't concentrate. Someone wants this report (and there are a million problems) and these emails need to go out (thousands of them according to our pre-audit) and they're all fucked up and not working and every single person on earth is asking me about them. I have to once again fix my time sheets from my Cuckoo's Nest time because she keeps saying they're wrong so I have to try to find all my electronic leave requests and figure out if any really ARE missing (and the online form isn't letting me edit so I keep creating NEW forms) and L wants the COPC report that is also going wonky. I can't keep my head on one thing. And I have to go through the 200 pre-audit files to prove that NO they didn't get the fucked up cancellation letters (just another stupid "dear student just in case we haven't told you five hundred times you have the right to cancel this loan if you decide you don't want a big screen TV" which don't work right either and as it's all programmed behind the scenes in some bunker called IT where they look at you like you're stupid like all tech support people do. And also prove that they DID get the goddam notification letters because they get sent out daily...if not daily FOR every day for students who have accepted a loan...it's all right there but I've had to explain three different times that we are talking about two entirely different emails.

And I've got PTSD about asking for help anyway due to the Reign of Terror, and I figured something out: when I started NO ONE was doing this job, and my ex boss threw everything at me that never worked right, that we've never been compliant on.

BUT NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR THESE THINGS. If Polly Wolly can plan an event for 60 people and also talk a lot about stuff she doesn't know...well she's a real go-getter. Monkey is a lazy complainer who is fucking up EVERYTHING. So I ask for help. "God you look stupid. Are you stupid? Why can't you answer my question? Do you know anything at all?"

Put in writing. Timeline it all. First off so you can feel clear about chronology in your own mind, but secondly, because the next time you're having to explain all this shit you can say here, and hand them a couple of pages of printed notes.

Work out roughly how much time each task/set of tasks takes, note down how long you spend on each phone call and each email (reading and responding). Do that for a week, like doing a food diary, but for work.

What you need is evidence. You need to be able to put that estimate of how long your regular tasks take, how many other tasks land on youand how long they take, how long you spend answering email queries and phonecalls, how long to research and write each report.

Let's see how many hours of work they're expecting you to do in the hours they pay you to do them, how much work you actually do and how much work is left undone to cause a bag load of unnecessary stress because it should never have landed on your in the first place.

Document everything. Seriously, it's little black book time. Get everything down on paper in a measurable and dateable form.

Oh and take a fucking holiday! (see Monster's Infi vacation thread).

They owe you the time, you need the time, spend it recuperating and looking for another job.

Just do your best. You know what your best is and at what pace and duration you can deliver it. YOU are the expert on what your best is. If you're doing your best, then you're doing what needs to be done, and the rest is not your problem.