I kinda thought he had it covered. Maybe I assume he has thicker skin than he has.

That was largely my first response.

[later, I wrote this to LJ on "real" friendships and the forums] [edits I would make since in bracket]

[are we friends?] Well I'm pretty fucked up, I'm a dedicated anti-social and have like three friends.

The Cellar folks are not [precisely] friends, but I don't [necessarily] expect the forums to produce genuine friendships [; it produced a marriage, so it surely can happen, but people don't necessarily convert "cellar friends" into "real" friends]. And yet the [forums] have a social function that is very friend-like. It produces genuine fulfillment, for many people, in many ways. There's great value to that. Sociologists haven't really defined it all yet, but what we are doing is creating new ways to be social and link to one another and care about one another. It may not be as deep as friendship. But not as deeply disappointing as friendship either...

I care about you man. I guess we're not friends in the traditional sense of the word. But you're a part of me that I value. A funny guy with an interesting life and beautiful family. I would do an awful lot for you. We're E-friends is what.

Hi! I've been gone for a week, and I come back to this? wow...but I definitely agree with UT's above post - E-Friends.

I've been telling the SO about the Cellar for a while - he finally decided to check it out, then got upset when he saw that it was more than "How 'bout them Lakers." Guess he didn't know you really can have such a thing as E-friends, and when you're happy or sad or need an opinion it's a nice place to turn and get usually unbiased opinions or input. I like the blatant honesty - I don't always agree, and I don't necessarily "like" everyone in here, but I take what I want and leave the rest.

Thanks for being here Cellar.

Great insights, UT.

I've analogized forums as talking to a person with three dozen split personalities. Sometimes they're witty, sometimes they're helpful, sometimes infuriating... It's like the magic eight ball. If you don't like the answer, walk away and "try again" later.

Thats where I think that some people thought differently. The things that I have seen happen on/through the cellar and the level of caring/concern/friendship seemed to have transcended from the simple online or e-friend. There have been many things done which caused me to think so, in my limited online experience anyway.

Just think of some of the ways that cellarites have banded together to help each other out. Some of the things that were done IRL for others who needed it.
Fer FOOKS SAKE - a car the donations to various people when down the collage ... Maybe all that happens on other forums, I dunno, but I doubt it.
That perception, real or imagined, led me to believe that the cellar was unique, different, special in some way. FWIW, I now realize I was wrong.

I think the friendships formed here are real friendships...they just exist in a different way and follow different 'rules'.

oh wow. well, umm, thanks for proving me wrong there S123.

oh, and FYI: I have met V. Didn't get the same impression as you. That is neither here nor there. Just my personal judgement (fairly well honed from years of working outreach in some scary areas, as well as having amassed a bunch of trust worthy friends, thus creating a sense of what we call "context") being different from yours.

That being said, I find it fascinating that I can not read a whole thread, comment on your post, which offends me, and get reamed for
a: being new (oh no! the horrors of being "new")
b: telling you what I think

and again, the irony of throwing a zillion insults at me for pointing out that you sidestep a point with namethrowing.

It's not making you look right. It's making you look mean.

That being said: I am somewhat new around here. You are right. But you know what this is a fucking BBS. Not a bar. Most people don't even know eachother, except through reading eachothers posts. So READING THREADS gives me familiarity I might not be able to gain in other social situations.

Also, I am new around here, so I am noticing trends in bulk. Trends like you thinking that you "tell it like it is" when in reality you just insult the fuck out of people to get a rise.

Also, oh did I mention this: I am new around here. And I am quickly choosing to not be old around here.
So you get your wish. Congrats you win.
Your prize,me on your level:

I will trot back to my fantasyland as it will, otherwise known as other internet communities that let me increase my overall knowledge and perspective by engaging in funny and informative conversations that keep the shit throwing and defensive posturing to a minimum.

Oh, and one more thing, a bonus just for you, especially for you S123:
FUCK YOU. You are a cunt. Clearly insecure. Clearly incapable of reading a post for content and not for the opportunity to pounce. You are, based on posts, clearly not smart enough to interact with people without making fun of them or understanding their actual motives. And for some reason you consider defending sad people a self serving ego fest instead of an instrument of empathy and kindness. Which makes you a very very stupid bitch.

Thank god you're not staying.

You are an instigator, just like your buddy Tiki and your buddy BigV. So guess what? You get what you give.

I'm a stupid cunt? Nice. I'm quite sure you shouldn't have said that.

Remember when this used to be a good place? Shall we go on another safari and bring more assholes back? They're like a fucking jungle disease. They do, however, give BigV someone to hang out with.

Go fuck yourself, daffy-dillweed. You're useless, stupid, and grossly misinformed.

Oh, and for the record. BigV and Tiki ARE psycho, which explains the draw for you.

I don't think that was wrong. I still maintain that the cellar is unique and different and special.


There are two things at play for me. One is actual friendship: there are people in this community I like ad care about and would name on my list of friends in this world. But there's also a wider sense of fraternal connection to dwellars more generally. That transcends my individual likes and dislikes and takes in friends and frenemies alike.

goddammit.


first: fuck you classic for making me read this thread.

2nd. You still don't get it, most of you. it's not about being thin skinned. at all.

3rd. daffodil....shawnee seems to be one of the few people that actually gets what is wrong here. And you don't know who youre talking to. your leaving will go unnoticed. please take mr V with you when you go.

4th. say it with me.....

E




A




bowl of D

um. gee. I can see why no one missed me.

15,000 again.....wiseass mods.

Yes, E A D, daffo.

Hey daff, have you read my 13000-some other posts?

I'm not stupid, I'm not a cunt, and I'm not a bitch. But I don't take crap off people like you, just walking down the street. Never have, never will.

Sorry Jim, thin or thick skinned, maybe wasnt the best way of putting it. Each time I logged in I saw you, or Jinx, or Clod (in the vaccine thread) pretty much slam dunk Tiki's bullshit. I figured you had it covered.