White Elephant
 

Our youngest sprog is in his last year of preschool. The preschool has an annual adults only party ( :D ) where we exchange white elephant gifts after a suitable amount of alcohol had been consumed. Usually the "gifts" we come home with are returned the next year, but as this is our last year, we appear to be stuck with a vomit-inducing-page-per-day Anne Geddes/Celene Dion Calendar (2005) :eek: :worried:

Any suggestions for creative disposal thereof? It's way too crispy for bogroll.

Anyone want to swap it for their unwanted gifts? Most things considered...

Tie in a roll with a piece of strong twine around the middle and leave long ends on both sides of the knot. Seat childer in comfortable positions where they will have a good view. Locate nearest Jack Russell Terrier(s) and lure back to your yard by swinging the rolled calendar by the strings just out of reach like a piñata. Have children count to 3 as you swing the roll higher and higher above the hysterical dog(s). Release. Duck and run. Enjoy the subsequent destruction with the kids.

:lol2:

Camp fire starter?

After it makes you vomit, clean up said vomit with the calendar pages and ship the entire mess to the hateful person who dumped the offending material on you. :vomitblu:

Wow. Anne Geddes... and Celine Dion... together????? I'm surprised the universe hasn't just melted.

Depends on what you mean by "together."

Shred, mix with bovine excrement and use as compost.

Do you have future Girl Scouts? One of the first projects they do is to make sit-upons (leatherette laced around newspaper or magazines). The kids use them to sit on at meetings.

Of course there's the time-honored dartboard/target practice thing.

Now I really have to share....

http://www.a-cd.de/images/articles/2...nne_geddes.jpg

That is scary in ways I don't want to think about.

But that is the kind of crap I buy for other people, just to disturb them. Every now and again, somebody likes the wierdness effect stuff, but not because it's weird. I find ways to drop communication gracefully with those people

Hey Monster, how 'bout a little NSFW or DISTURBING IMAGE WARNING? please!

;)

My favorite disposal techniques was the NYC garbage strike method of trash removal: Gift wrap calendar and leave it somewhere likely to be stolen.