The absolutely illuminating Undertoad thread
 

Bound to be a bit geeky, but absolutely illuminating and guaranteed to be true.

I'll start off.

Undertoad codes by typing native binary into cat or copy (he's platform agnostic).

There is no database behind the Cellar. Undertoad just remembers everything you've ever written and types the pages on the fly when accessed.

UT has sixteen keyboard spread out in front of him, and types on them simultaneously. Sometimes he grows extra hands and fingers, which retract when he no longer needs them. He predicts posts, and has responses already saved on his mental hard drive, so he can just copy and paste them.

When he's had a heavy meal sometimes a little acidic bile rises and this surfaces in the Cellar as trolls. He will tolerate it to a point - being manly, but after a while he cancels it out with a Banned antacid.

The Cellar is not physically connected to the Internet. Undertoad telepaths its contents in real time to each individual user's computer screen, including each character, as you type it. He does this while playing World of Warcraft, listening to three CDs simultaneously, playing with his dog and flirting with Jacquelita.

Buddug was UT's poop.

Mr Shepps is too humble to allow this type of thing. you should all expect to be banned in a moment.

UT authored the entire Chuck Norris phenomenon, using anecdotes from his own life, in order to make fools of those who might try to expose his omnipotence.

The human being some of us have met at GTGs, etc. is a hireling of UT whom he sends out so that we won't discover The Truth as explained in posts above.

UT invented the Internet when he was but a lad of 12. He invented binary code at the age of 4.

The universe that we percieve is merely a bass solo, played by UT.

String Theory?
 

Undertoad causes all sorts of amazing things to occur in the universe and sends people out to take pictures of them to assure a well-stocked IOTD queue.

An IT job was posted at one of the premiere science institutes. Undertoad's left little finger was over-qualified for the job.

UT and The Beast had a show-down.

Later that same day, UT had a big plate of Roast Beast for supper.