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-   -   Its pouring.... (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=16661)

DucksNuts 02-18-2008 04:39 AM

Its pouring....
 
Not with rain...although I am wishing.

Doncha hate when it seems another crossroad comes along, just after you settled on the direction to take for the last one?

Im moving house in three weeks and I just know I am going to have to make some decisions in the not too distant future.

To be with the man I want to be with, I am going to need to move.

Move away from my parents.... my Father who is quite ill with liver cancer, my Mother who I adore and cant comprehend seeing several times a week.

Move away from my job.....its a love/hate relationship. Its a good job and great people.

Away from friends, new house, new school (5 yr old).

Move away from the stability and comfort that is my life.

The other party cant move, his kids Mother lives where he is.

The *old* me would just go ...."fuck it, lives too short".

This me is chicken shit.

regular.joe 02-18-2008 04:47 AM

Damn Duck...so what's the problem?

xoxoxoBruce 02-18-2008 04:56 AM

How far away?

richlevy 02-18-2008 09:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DucksNuts (Post 432977)

Away from friends, new house, new school (5 yr old).

Does this mean you have a 5-year-old child or that you've been there 5 years? If the latter, are you a student or staff at the school?

shina 02-18-2008 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce (Post 432982)
How far away?

Is it a huge distance. I moved across the country for work. Left family, friends and boyfriend behind. He was going to move to the NW but then changed his mind and stayed in FL.

I must say that although the move was hard, it ended up being the right decision for me. I have constant contact with my family, they have visited me here and I have gone home.

You and your child will be good wherever you end up. Go with your gut instinct. It's usually right.

DucksNuts 02-19-2008 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce
How far away?

5 hours drive.


Quote:

Originally Posted by richlevy (Post 432994)
Does this mean you have a 5-year-old child or that you've been there 5 years? If the latter, are you a student or staff at the school?

5 year old just started school.

Im just being a wuss and looking for reasons not to uproot my life.

Aliantha 02-19-2008 04:39 PM

So who is this fella??? Details?

xoxoxoBruce 02-19-2008 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DucksNuts (Post 433423)
5 hours drive.

So it would be possible to to weekends for a while... rough but doable.


Quote:

Im just being a wuss and looking for reasons not to uproot my life.
You have some good ones, at least good enough to be cautious.

monster 02-19-2008 11:48 PM

Nuts, It sounds like you're thinking forwards -which is great- but the whole point of that exercise is to make it easier further down the line when it's a real question, not to stress you out more now.... :rolleyes:

Shawnee123 02-20-2008 07:58 AM

Tough thing, Ducks. I am glad to hear it's *only* a five hour drive. Though I know it will be much harder to see your family, I was worried you were talking about airplane ride distance, which would really suck. I would have a hard time leaving my 'rents, too. I see them almost every week, as well as seeing my brothers and nieces and nephews.

You can make it work if it's what you really want. You always have a support system here.

Elspode 02-21-2008 03:12 PM

I think that, since this is basically about being with a mate, I'd have to consider whether or not the potential partner is worth the risks of uprooting my entire life. I'd have to be entirely certain that he was was very low risk and very high reward.

You love your family, you love your job (or so it seems for the most part)...is your love for the guy equal to or greater than the sum of these other known quantities?

Best of luck in this, Ducks. At least there's love all around.

DucksNuts 02-21-2008 07:45 PM

I get what youre saying 'spode...but how will I know if he is worth it, if I dont take the chance?

We all know the long distance thing wont work for long, the natural progression of the relationship would mean that one of us would have to make the move...whether it be soon...or in 12 months time.

At the moment, one of us does the commute every 2nd or 3rd weekend.

Yeah Shawnee, its mainly my parents that are holding me.

If I only had to give up my job, and could keep the other stuff....no biggie.

It would even be fine if I only had to give up seeing my parents whenever I wanted too....I would do it....but its *all* the stuff combined make it tough.

Meh, I am just gonna pretend the issue doesnt exist :)

Elspode 02-21-2008 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DucksNuts (Post 433981)
I get what youre saying 'spode...but how will I know if he is worth it, if I dont take the chance?

Just make sure you've made a thorough evaluation of the big picture before jumping in with both feet. Hey, my oldest kid just announced tonight that he and his g/f are now engaged to marry in March of 2009. This on the heels of my youngest telling us last night that he had impregnated a girl who is not his g/f who is living with him (in our house), and that said expectant girl wants him to take the child after it is born.

All this to say that life is full of risks and rewards. I'm sure you'll make a good decision.

classicman 02-27-2008 12:20 PM

Wow - Granpa Spode - inda has a nice ring to it... Congrats, I think!


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