Tabloid headlines of the near future
 

"Jessica Lynch's bondsman claims he sprung her, not the Army!"

"Keith Richards becomes world's oldest man at the age of 65!"

"Anton Shepps exposed as al-Quida operative. Claims he was 'just a patsy'."

This is fun. Add your own.

mass murder/ suicide in local high school:
schoolmates say,

" i don't know, she was kind of a loner. kept to herself. spent most of her time posting to message boards"

George Bush Sr says " The little shit wouldn't listen to me when I told him it's about the economy".

"prince william revealed as antichrist....high tea in hell!"

"Man known only as 'Nothing But Net' tops Wilt Chamberlain's long standing scoring record"

Local man visited Internet message boards for intelligent conversation, thoughtful commentary
Shocked & disgusted neighbors ask for police protection
"Why can't Daddy look for naked women like everybody else?" asks distraught daughter

Texas man arrested for remarkable acts of lewdness
"Definitely looked eighteen to me," camera-holding perp calling himself "Enn Bee Enn" claims

Virginia Man Killed by Calif. Biologist
Members of internet message board say "he had it coming"

DC-area military firm says it has developed phenomenal new weapon
Flamage test, delivered over Internet, accidentally causes massive fires around San Diego area

step aside, sybill

we have a new multi schizzophrenic member

!!!

"Virgin Mary found in street map of downtown Los Angelos! Millions flock to site for worship!"