Worst Movie EVER...and I saw St. Peppers

Trilby · 11-05-2006, 03:24 PM

Do NOT blow your hard-earned money on Sophie Coppola's Marie Antoinette--it was, by far, the suckiest movie I have ever, ever seen--and I've seen some pretty sucky ones.

Movies that were better than Marie A.:

St. Peppers-Yes, the one with the Bee Gees.

Any movie Tom Green has been in--Freddy Got Fingered comes to mind.

Blair Witch Project and BWP II

Xanadu

Gigli

All were better than this indulgent piece of cream cake. Coppola spends actual movie minutes (a long, long time) recording KiKi Dunsts' ennui--which is pretty ennui-inducing in itself--and spends approximately 119 minutes of the movies 120 minutes letting us know how pampered these people were and how much fun they had via scenes of gambling, toasting, eating, dressing, partying, gossiping, eating some more, partying some more, etc. etc.--most movie-goers would get this idea in about three minutes...AND she ends the movie as MA, kids and King are fleeing Versailles with a fast, Mtv-ish blackout. No beheadings, no come-uppance!

Tres awful!

wolf · 11-05-2006, 03:37 PM

Luckily, I wasn't planning on spending any of my precious movie-going time on this massive costume drama.

If I pay $8 for a movie and $10 for popcorn and soda, somebody's head better explode on screen.

Trilby · 11-05-2006, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

If I pay $8 for a movie and $10 for popcorn and soda, somebody's head better explode on screen.

Agreed.

Do you think I watch too many movies with my teenagers?

Spexxvet · 11-06-2006, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

...If I pay $8 for a movie and $10 for popcorn and soda, somebody's head better explode on screen.

Or nudity. Then again, nobody's head exploded in A Clockwork Orange.

Elspode · 11-06-2006, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

Or nudity. Then again, nobody's head exploded in A Clockwork Orange.

Well, no...but there was lots of really horrorshow tolchocks in the yarbles, and molestation of dreamy devotchkas and tons of ultraviolence, o' my brother.

wolf · 11-07-2006, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

Or nudity. Then again, nobody's head exploded in A Clockwork Orange.

Other than in the audience, you mean, right?

footfootfoot · 11-05-2006, 05:00 PM

I could have told you that. Here's my rule of thumb, not that you asked:
Avoid any movie made by the child of a wealthy and famous filmmaker.

I'm told by a reliable source that all of Coppola's wines are quite good. But I bet if his kids take over the vinyard, the wines will start to suck.

Trilby · 11-05-2006, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

Avoid any movie made by the child of a wealthy and famous filmmaker.

Mm. That is why you are $6.75 richer than I am right now. Plus, like, $12.00 for a medium pop. I coulda bought three cases for that.

SteveDallas · 11-06-2006, 08:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

Avoid any movie made by the child of a wealthy and famous filmmaker.

I actually liked The Virgin Suicides.

I have no particular interest in seeing people's heads explode, but if Kirsten Dunst were getting naked, I suppose I'd have to at least rent the DVD.

DanaC · 11-05-2006, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Avoid any movie made by the child of a wealthy and famous filmmaker.

Unless the filmmaker in question happens to be called Dario Argento, and the child in question is his daughter, Asia.

footfootfoot · 11-06-2006, 07:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanaC

Unless the filmmaker in question happens to be called Dario Argento, and the child in question is his daughter, Asia.

If my first question is WHO? then he can't be all that famous. I shall google him.

OK he seems well connected, but he also seems less a commercial success than an artistic success. But I don't know.

Sheldonrs · 11-06-2006, 08:11 AM

I have no plans on seeing this film. But I hve a hard time thinking ANY film could be worse than Cronenberg's movie "Crash". It made me sick to my stomache and I left after the 1st hour.

King · 12-10-2006, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sheldonrs

I have no plans on seeing this film. But I hve a hard time thinking ANY film could be worse than Cronenberg's movie "Crash".

Same here. The only film that comes close is Timecode. There are four screens at once, and yet nothing happens on any of them. Most of the film involves people just sitting there, pointless conversations, and random earthquakes, which were apparently only put there as cues to the actors (the film was shot in one take).

HungLikeJesus · 06-07-2007, 04:19 PM

I'll add two:
The Worm Eaters
Surf Nazi's Must Die

But they were both better than Safe or Monster's Ball.

Planet Terror (the first half of Grindhouse) had a good exploding head scene.

Flint · 11-05-2006, 07:54 PM

Space is the Place, by free-jazz innovator Sun Ra: worst movie I've ever seen.

11-05-2006, 03:24 PM	#1
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Worst Movie EVER...and I saw St. Peppers Do NOT blow your hard-earned money on Sophie Coppola's Marie Antoinette--it was, by far, the suckiest movie I have ever, ever seen--and I've seen some pretty sucky ones. Movies that were better than Marie A.: St. Peppers-Yes, the one with the Bee Gees. Any movie Tom Green has been in--Freddy Got Fingered comes to mind. Blair Witch Project and BWP II Xanadu Gigli All were better than this indulgent piece of cream cake. Coppola spends actual movie minutes (a long, long time) recording KiKi Dunsts' ennui--which is pretty ennui-inducing in itself--and spends approximately 119 minutes of the movies 120 minutes letting us know how pampered these people were and how much fun they had via scenes of gambling, toasting, eating, dressing, partying, gossiping, eating some more, partying some more, etc. etc.--most movie-goers would get this idea in about three minutes...AND she ends the movie as MA, kids and King are fleeing Versailles with a fast, Mtv-ish blackout. No beheadings, no come-uppance! Tres awful! __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum Last edited by Trilby; 11-05-2006 at 03:28 PM.

11-05-2006, 03:37 PM	#2
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Luckily, I wasn't planning on spending any of my precious movie-going time on this massive costume drama. If I pay $8 for a movie and $10 for popcorn and soda, somebody's head better explode on screen. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-05-2006, 05:00 PM	#7
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	I could have told you that. Here's my rule of thumb, not that you asked: Avoid any movie made by the child of a wealthy and famous filmmaker. I'm told by a reliable source that all of Coppola's wines are quite good. But I bet if his kids take over the vinyard, the wines will start to suck. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

11-06-2006, 08:11 AM	#12
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	I have no plans on seeing this film. But I hve a hard time thinking ANY film could be worse than Cronenberg's movie "Crash". It made me sick to my stomache and I left after the 1st hour. __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.

06-07-2007, 04:19 PM	#14
HungLikeJesus Only looks like a disaster tourist Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: above 7,000 feet Posts: 7,208	I'll add two: The Worm Eaters Surf Nazi's Must Die But they were both better than Safe or Monster's Ball. Planet Terror (the first half of Grindhouse) had a good exploding head scene. __________________ Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.

11-05-2006, 07:54 PM	#15
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Space is the Place, by free-jazz innovator Sun Ra: worst movie I've ever seen. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

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