08-12-2010, 11:55 AM | #1171 |
I know, right?
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,539
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That explains why my Blackberry caught a virus.
Har, har, har. Actually I don't know that it's a virus, it's just broken. AT&T is sending me a new one and I hope it gets here real soon. |
08-12-2010, 02:09 PM | #1172 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
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@ Juni
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The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
08-12-2010, 02:59 PM | #1173 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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Hey, sweet! According to that chart, I should own an iPhone. So who's gonna buy me one?
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08-12-2010, 03:14 PM | #1174 |
Touring the facilities
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: The plains of Colorado
Posts: 3,476
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I knew I picked the wrong phone. Dangit!
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09-24-2010, 03:22 PM | #1175 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Payback Is A Bitch!
So, if you'll recall, I was relating what we'll refer to as The Re-awakening of Gravdigr...
On the night in question (Oh What a Night), during the preliminaries, I was, shall we say, having an intense and deeply stimulating conversation with 'a little man in a boat'. This was not a short chat folks. I'd been wanting to have this particular conversation for like twelve-fifteen YEARS. Anyway, during the conversation, whenever she 'neared the top of the mountain', I would not let her actually reach the top of said mountain. I would stop 'talking', and go back to the slooooow circular rub. I lost count how many times this happened. When, finally, I let her get to the mountaintop (I call this "Mountaintop Removal Mining") she says "Oh, he's not gonna stop!!" I liked that. Now, I told you that, to tell you this: Last night, she stops in for a visit. After we sent mom-and-popdigr to their room, she climbs onto my lap and proceeds to give me the mother of all lapdances. People, I have never been this turned on when everyone involved had their clothes on. What was, at first, unconcealable stirrings, soon turned into a fully engorged, blue-veined throbber. I'm wearing thin cotton shorts, so there's no hiding anything. She reaches up the leg of my shorts, takes matters into hand and says "Looks like you're ready!" And then she left.
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09-24-2010, 03:59 PM | #1176 |
Are you knock-kneed?
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Middle Hoosierland
Posts: 3,549
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You write sexy very well Gravedigr..
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09-26-2010, 12:53 AM | #1177 |
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Why thank you.
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09-26-2010, 09:33 AM | #1178 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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Looks like she intends to make your mountain climb more of an expedition...
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
09-26-2010, 03:21 PM | #1179 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
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This is actually against the rules and regulations.
Womenfolk don't understand because their sexual response is different. But the law is, if you touch it, you have to finish it. What she doesn't realize, digr, is that five seconds after the door shut, you were in your bedroom beating your dick like it owed you money.* And twenty seconds after that, the entire encounter was over and you were thinking, not about her, but about whether there's any milk left in the fridge. That's what we are as guys and I'm not sure the females of our species fully understand this. *I believe this line was originally written by Paul Mooney, used on The Dave Chappelle Show and was subsequently stolen by Carlos Mencia. |
09-26-2010, 05:15 PM | #1180 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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It can't work that way 100% of the time, though, or else you wouldn't need us in the first place.
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09-26-2010, 05:59 PM | #1182 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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We don't need you in the first place, we need you in the special place.
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
09-26-2010, 06:22 PM | #1183 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
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She thinks she's created a situation where he wants her more because she left him hanging, because that's how it works for her. How it works for guys is, once a guy gets aroused, he is going to finish somewhere* - it's so biologically driven that for many guys it's practically painful not to. And then move on to the next thing. That's just what we do, that's our programming.
* He would want her more if it was on her stomach, but this time it was on a dirty sock next to the bed. |
09-26-2010, 07:53 PM | #1184 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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If you want to be wanted, this is the only time in your live when you get the opportunity, you should blow it.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
09-27-2010, 02:20 AM | #1185 | ||||
The Un-Tuckian
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: South Central...KY that is
Posts: 39,517
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Quote:
I think they may play by different rules. No, no. It's supposed to be "If I get to touch it, I get to finish it." Quote:
And I wouldn't loan money to my dick. Quote:
Quote:
I would hate to know what it feels like to want her more.
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