RANT WARNING

monster · 01-13-2013, 11:19 PM

The hardest thing sbout having a stroke is the other people needing reassurance.

Firstly, they want to know what you did wrong so they can be sure they're not doing it too.

Secondly, they want to know you're doing OK and getting better and expected to make a full recovery so they can get on with their lives and not feel guilty about it.

They don't want to hear it's the type of thing that can happen to anyone. I wonder why they're not reassured by "it's OK, rest easy, I've taken the bullet for my circle of friends, you're good...."

Sounds cynical? maybe. maybe not. what was your first thought when you learned I had a stroke? My first thought was "well the eonly bad thing I do is drink too much beer...must be the beer.... (doc said no). So then I thought, better me than my kid (once they compared me to the heathy young athletes who drop dead without warning)

People, I can't reassure you. This IS the random shit that happens to anyone. could have been one of my kids, I'm thankful it isn't although to be honest, it affects allof us equally. So I have to deal with not being able to drive and my vision being fuzzy and my limbs weak.... we all have to deal with me being taken out of control of the beestmonster calendar and excursions. Ican't even begin to describe the clusterfuck that happened to Hebe's ride this weekend.....but I'm sure I will soon......

and we all have to deal with my mourning of my loss and we all have to dealwith the depreddion snd snxiety and emotion and mood swings that come with most strokes.

So please, don't seek reassurance from me right now. Also, don't ask for or expect personal updates. I have snough difficulty updating myself. If somwthing bad happens, you will know. If something good happens, I'll be too busy enjoying it to update you. Please assume no news is good news and get the fuck out there and enjoy your life.

footfootfoot · 01-13-2013, 11:34 PM

Awesome. I'll get to it first thing in the morning. Thanks.

Aliantha · 01-14-2013, 12:29 AM

monster, maybe people actually just care about you and want you to be well again (or as well as you can possibly get), and they want you to know that you are valued and loved in order to bolster your spirit and give you strength.

It could be just me, but when I read the first post about what happened to you, my first thought was 'thank god she's still here and fighting'. Maybe if I try to analyse it I'll find some ulterior motive to my thoughts, but mostly I was just glad you weren't dead.

eta: or worse, a total vegetable.

limey · 01-14-2013, 04:47 AM

^WSS^
I look forward to no news from you

morethanpretty · 01-14-2013, 07:21 AM

You deserve to rant and feel the way you do. I'm sorry for your losses, but I'm glad you're still here to rant and fight and spit and be monster and be whatever else you want to be.

jimhelm · 01-14-2013, 08:25 AM

these three nuns are walking through the park, when out jumps a flasher in a London Fog Overcoat.

The flasher throws open his coat, revealing his naked male body to the nuns, and begins to wag his member back and forth.

The first Nun has a stroke.

The SECOND Nun also has a stroke.

wait for it.....

The Third Nun refused to touch it.

monster · 01-14-2013, 10:27 AM

I know, all and I'm sorry, i was jusr trying to find somewhere pseudoanon to be ungratful and hold my pity party. I'll tak e it somewhere else, I know you care snd you're all wonderful. I'm sorry

Nirvana · 01-14-2013, 10:29 AM

The things one learns in Catholic school...

Carry on Monster our hand is on your back...

monster · 01-14-2013, 10:31 AM

I didn't mean to hurt anyone's feeeling, but it all gets so "weighty".

I'm reminded of the scene in crocodile Dundee where he's wondering why they all have shrinks.

BigV · 01-14-2013, 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

I know, all and I'm sorry, i was jusr trying to find somewhere pseudoanon to be ungratful and hold my pity party. I'll tak e it somewhere else, I know you care snd you're all wonderful. I'm sorry

Pretend you're talking to me then.

glatt · 01-14-2013, 10:43 AM

You can rant here all you like. Share your life, even if it ain't pretty. We can't help with rides and stuff, but the least we can do is let you vent here.

xoxoxoBruce · 01-14-2013, 10:52 AM

By the time I heard, people were saying you were in the hospital and stable. My first thought was holy shit, the sun exploded how are the planets going to stay in orbit.

From years of posts about your hectic schedule, it was clear there was a lot of people, not just immediate family, who depended on you to make the Sun come up on a regular basis. Maybe now they'll appreciate how much you did... nah, they'll just blame you for letting them down.

I was cheered by the feistiness of your post, you'll handle it.

jimhelm · 01-14-2013, 11:33 AM

I have been not replying much to this topic, because I really don't want to just spew platitudes.... and get wells... this seems to me to be much more frightening and life alteringly serious than you're letting on. You go 100 mph all the time, and now you're gonna have to take it slow. At least in the near term... It must be making you nuts. I'm really sorry this shit happened to you, dude.

You can be not-your-best with us. yell at us preemptively, or in response to things... or cry or act like a loon, or type like you have 2 left hands... any of that's fine, and you know you don't need me to tell you so. Just do what you need to do to heal, and take care of your family. We'll get over it if you scorch the earth a bit in the process.

BigV · 01-14-2013, 11:38 AM

two left hands?! you insensitive bastard, don't you know monster's all right now?

limey · 01-14-2013, 11:44 AM

This is definitely the place to bring the rants and the pityparties. Do not fucking apologise to us about that because we all love you here. It is because we all love you you that you should bring your crap (pseudoanoymous or not) right here and let it all (ALL) hang out. Now. M'kay?
Oh, and whut Jim said, too (not about the nuns).

01-13-2013, 11:19 PM	#1
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	RANT WARNING The hardest thing sbout having a stroke is the other people needing reassurance. Firstly, they want to know what you did wrong so they can be sure they're not doing it too. Secondly, they want to know you're doing OK and getting better and expected to make a full recovery so they can get on with their lives and not feel guilty about it. They don't want to hear it's the type of thing that can happen to anyone. I wonder why they're not reassured by "it's OK, rest easy, I've taken the bullet for my circle of friends, you're good...." Sounds cynical? maybe. maybe not. what was your first thought when you learned I had a stroke? My first thought was "well the eonly bad thing I do is drink too much beer...must be the beer.... (doc said no). So then I thought, better me than my kid (once they compared me to the heathy young athletes who drop dead without warning) People, I can't reassure you. This IS the random shit that happens to anyone. could have been one of my kids, I'm thankful it isn't although to be honest, it affects allof us equally. So I have to deal with not being able to drive and my vision being fuzzy and my limbs weak.... we all have to deal with me being taken out of control of the beestmonster calendar and excursions. Ican't even begin to describe the clusterfuck that happened to Hebe's ride this weekend.....but I'm sure I will soon...... and we all have to deal with my mourning of my loss and we all have to dealwith the depreddion snd snxiety and emotion and mood swings that come with most strokes. So please, don't seek reassurance from me right now. Also, don't ask for or expect personal updates. I have snough difficulty updating myself. If somwthing bad happens, you will know. If something good happens, I'll be too busy enjoying it to update you. Please assume no news is good news and get the fuck out there and enjoy your life. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

01-13-2013, 11:34 PM	#2
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Awesome. I'll get to it first thing in the morning. Thanks. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

01-14-2013, 12:29 AM	#3
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	monster, maybe people actually just care about you and want you to be well again (or as well as you can possibly get), and they want you to know that you are valued and loved in order to bolster your spirit and give you strength. It could be just me, but when I read the first post about what happened to you, my first thought was 'thank god she's still here and fighting'. Maybe if I try to analyse it I'll find some ulterior motive to my thoughts, but mostly I was just glad you weren't dead. eta: or worse, a total vegetable. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

01-14-2013, 04:47 AM	#4
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	^WSS^ I look forward to no news from you __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

01-14-2013, 07:21 AM	#5
morethanpretty Thats "Miss Zipper Neck" to you. Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: little town (but not the littlest) in texas Posts: 2,957	You deserve to rant and feel the way you do. I'm sorry for your losses, but I'm glad you're still here to rant and fight and spit and be monster and be whatever else you want to be. __________________ Addicts may suck dick for coke, but love came up with the idea to put a dick in there to begin with. -Jack O'Brien

01-14-2013, 08:25 AM	#6
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	these three nuns are walking through the park, when out jumps a flasher in a London Fog Overcoat. The flasher throws open his coat, revealing his naked male body to the nuns, and begins to wag his member back and forth. The first Nun has a stroke. The SECOND Nun also has a stroke. wait for it..... The Third Nun refused to touch it. __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

01-14-2013, 10:27 AM	#7
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I know, all and I'm sorry, i was jusr trying to find somewhere pseudoanon to be ungratful and hold my pity party. I'll tak e it somewhere else, I know you care snd you're all wonderful. I'm sorry __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

01-14-2013, 10:29 AM	#8
Nirvana Back in 10 Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 3,684	The things one learns in Catholic school... Carry on Monster our hand is on your back... __________________ Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind.

01-14-2013, 10:31 AM	#9
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I didn't mean to hurt anyone's feeeling, but it all gets so "weighty". I'm reminded of the scene in crocodile Dundee where he's wondering why they all have shrinks. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

01-14-2013, 10:43 AM	#11
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	You can rant here all you like. Share your life, even if it ain't pretty. We can't help with rides and stuff, but the least we can do is let you vent here.

01-14-2013, 10:52 AM	#12
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	By the time I heard, people were saying you were in the hospital and stable. My first thought was holy shit, the sun exploded how are the planets going to stay in orbit. From years of posts about your hectic schedule, it was clear there was a lot of people, not just immediate family, who depended on you to make the Sun come up on a regular basis. Maybe now they'll appreciate how much you did... nah, they'll just blame you for letting them down. I was cheered by the feistiness of your post, you'll handle it. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

01-14-2013, 11:33 AM	#13
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	I have been not replying much to this topic, because I really don't want to just spew platitudes.... and get wells... this seems to me to be much more frightening and life alteringly serious than you're letting on. You go 100 mph all the time, and now you're gonna have to take it slow. At least in the near term... It must be making you nuts. I'm really sorry this shit happened to you, dude. You can be not-your-best with us. yell at us preemptively, or in response to things... or cry or act like a loon, or type like you have 2 left hands... any of that's fine, and you know you don't need me to tell you so. Just do what you need to do to heal, and take care of your family. We'll get over it if you scorch the earth a bit in the process. __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

01-14-2013, 11:38 AM	#14
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	two left hands?! you insensitive bastard, don't you know monster's all right now? __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

01-14-2013, 11:44 AM	#15
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	This is definitely the place to bring the rants and the pityparties. Do not fucking apologise to us about that because we all love you here. It is because we all love you you that you should bring your crap (pseudoanoymous or not) right here and let it all (ALL) hang out. Now. M'kay? Oh, and whut Jim said, too (not about the nuns). __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)