Your Personal Guinness Records

infinite monkey · 03-22-2013, 11:24 AM

I have the world's most giant Sea Monkey in my office. I can't get a good picture of him through the plastic aquarium. But he's huge, I tell you. HUGE.

:seamonkeysmilie:

footfootfoot · 03-22-2013, 12:34 PM

My personal Guinness record is 16 pints, but that was over the space of two hours.

Lamplighter · 03-22-2013, 12:36 PM

...so that's how you use that third foot.

footfootfoot · 03-22-2013, 12:47 PM

Gravdigr · 03-22-2013, 04:37 PM

Mama Sea Monkey makes me wish I had sixteen hands.

Gravdigr · 03-22-2013, 04:38 PM

So does Papa Sea Monkey...

Sundae · 03-23-2013, 07:14 AM

I had sea monkeys on my desk when I worked in London.
Trouble is, the "aquarium" looked like some kind of office toy, so I had to put a label on it asking people not to shake it or turn it upside down.
That took much of the fun out of things. I flushed them down the toilet one day, tired of explaining the label.

I did set a personal best on Arran though.
I walked to Kildoran in just over an hour.
Can you still claim a personal best if you have never walked the route before?

footfootfoot · 03-23-2013, 12:58 PM

Yes, you can. Guinness may not recognize it, but to hell with those bog trotters.

regular.joe · 03-24-2013, 09:05 AM

I too could drink 16 pints of the black stuff. This was 22 years ago. Oh, included shots of whiskey somewhere along the way. Done on multiple occasions.

Griff · 03-24-2013, 09:30 AM

Yeah, bitd I could put it away. My nasty beer record was 24 pounds plus shots plus smoke. Maybe I should have taken harder classes.

Undertoad · 03-24-2013, 09:47 AM

24 pounds!

footfootfoot · 03-24-2013, 01:41 PM

24 pounds? Christ, that must be at least $75 in rolling papers.

Griff · 03-24-2013, 04:13 PM

There was a fair amount of vomiting involved. Old Milwaukee, I believe, just screams class. Now 24 lbs of dope... that'd be a whole other toxicology report.

infinite monkey · 03-29-2013, 11:32 AM

Crush the Sea Monkey disappeared. Or died. I don't know.

He was there, then he wasn't. I looked in the muck and didn't see him. The last time I looked which was at least the evening before he was swimming around like a crazy man!

This was yesterday. I said "Hey! Someone stole my sea monkey!" and my cow orkers were like "you mean the whole aquarium?" and I'm like "no, just Crush."

"Why would someone steal a Sea Monkey" she said as she cocked her eyebrow at me.

"To be mean. To think it was funny because it's just a stoopid little brine shrimp so it would be funny to reach in there and pull him out and throw him away."

I was kidding. I think he's Jesus Sea Monkey and just got the day wrong. Come Monday, it'll be all right. He'll be back in his tank.

So...my cat visited again last night. God he's cute. Lets me carry him around under one arm, just as content as can be. But he can't stay. He's used to being outside a lot and I am not ready for that. But he is sweet to see from time to time. Just acts like we're old friends. Mi casa su casa.

Meow casa.

footfootfoot · 03-29-2013, 11:36 AM

'supcat? or Cat!'sup?

03-22-2013, 11:24 AM	#1
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Your Personal Guinness Records I have the world's most giant Sea Monkey in my office. I can't get a good picture of him through the plastic aquarium. But he's huge, I tell you. HUGE. :seamonkeysmilie: Attached Images Last edited by infinite monkey; 03-22-2013 at 11:49 AM.

03-22-2013, 12:34 PM	#2
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	My personal Guinness record is 16 pints, but that was over the space of two hours. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

03-22-2013, 12:47 PM	#4
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	__________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

03-22-2013, 04:37 PM	#5
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Mama Sea Monkey makes me wish I had sixteen hands. __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

03-22-2013, 04:38 PM	#6
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	So does Papa Sea Monkey... __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

03-22-2013, 12:36 PM	#3
Lamplighter Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Bottom lands of the Missoula floods Posts: 6,402	...so that's how you use that third foot.

03-23-2013, 07:14 AM	#7
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I had sea monkeys on my desk when I worked in London. Trouble is, the "aquarium" looked like some kind of office toy, so I had to put a label on it asking people not to shake it or turn it upside down. That took much of the fun out of things. I flushed them down the toilet one day, tired of explaining the label. I did set a personal best on Arran though. I walked to Kildoran in just over an hour. Can you still claim a personal best if you have never walked the route before? __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

03-23-2013, 12:58 PM	#8
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Yes, you can. Guinness may not recognize it, but to hell with those bog trotters. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

03-24-2013, 09:05 AM	#9
regular.joe Старый сержант Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: NC, dreaming of large Russian women. Posts: 1,464	I too could drink 16 pints of the black stuff. This was 22 years ago. Oh, included shots of whiskey somewhere along the way. Done on multiple occasions. __________________ Birth, wealth, and position are valueless during wartime. Man is only judged by his character --Soldier's Testament. Death, like birth, is a secret of Nature. - Marcus Aurelius.

03-24-2013, 09:30 AM	#10
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Yeah, bitd I could put it away. My nasty beer record was 24 pounds plus shots plus smoke. Maybe I should have taken harder classes. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

03-24-2013, 09:47 AM	#11
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	24 pounds!

03-24-2013, 01:41 PM	#12
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	24 pounds? Christ, that must be at least $75 in rolling papers. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

03-24-2013, 04:13 PM	#13
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	There was a fair amount of vomiting involved. Old Milwaukee, I believe, just screams class. Now 24 lbs of dope... that'd be a whole other toxicology report. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

03-29-2013, 11:32 AM	#14
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Crush the Sea Monkey disappeared. Or died. I don't know. He was there, then he wasn't. I looked in the muck and didn't see him. The last time I looked which was at least the evening before he was swimming around like a crazy man! This was yesterday. I said "Hey! Someone stole my sea monkey!" and my cow orkers were like "you mean the whole aquarium?" and I'm like "no, just Crush." "Why would someone steal a Sea Monkey" she said as she cocked her eyebrow at me. "To be mean. To think it was funny because it's just a stoopid little brine shrimp so it would be funny to reach in there and pull him out and throw him away." I was kidding. I think he's Jesus Sea Monkey and just got the day wrong. Come Monday, it'll be all right. He'll be back in his tank. So...my cat visited again last night. God he's cute. Lets me carry him around under one arm, just as content as can be. But he can't stay. He's used to being outside a lot and I am not ready for that. But he is sweet to see from time to time. Just acts like we're old friends. Mi casa su casa. Meow casa.

03-29-2013, 11:36 AM	#15
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	'supcat? or Cat!'sup? __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

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