I'm Back! Waaayyy back, in fact...

[Elspode]

May 2003 started out unassumingly enough. Certainly, like all Springtides, it was filled with hope and promise, but soon dark clouds - both literal and figurative - began to gather.

Although my family was blessed in that we did not suffer the horrific affronts served up by Mother Nature in the first days of the month, other difficulties manifested in short order. Neighborhood gangsta wannabees bore down hard on our children, even to the point of an assault being committed upon our youngest as he stood inside our own front door. The middle son was stalked almost daily as he walked home from school, enduring catcalls and being spat upon. The night before I was to pick up my eldest for Heartland Pagan Fest 2003, his apartment was burglarized as he slept in his bed, awakening only when an arm reached across his face to steal the telephone from his headboard. By the time I'd scurried back into town, relieved to find him safe, he'd taken stock of his losses, including his computer, his wallet, his checkbook, his keys, a pair of pants, and any sense of security he'd once tenuously held. Seems like rather a lot to absorb for a young man with cognitive disabilities and a seizure disorder, living on disability and a meager part time, sub-minimum wage job. We try to take solace in the notion that, somewhere in suburban Grandview, a crackhead enjoyed another day, free from the burdens of having to work for a living, and sated to the point that he need not claw his own eyes out to stop the hallucinations. At least my eldest hadn't been threatened with violence or sucker punched in the face like his two brothers.

The Heartland Fest itself was a brief but welcome respite from the travails of the mundane world (funny how something that a major portion of world would view as the height of sin and immorality turns out to be the only entirely moral and enlightening part of my entire month), but as it always does, it too soon came to a conclusion, and I returned home battling a nasty respiratory infection, causing me to extend my vacation by two fateful days.

Yesterday, I dragged my ass in to the office and dug into the incredible backlog of work, barely putting a dent in it...after all, I'm the only one who does what I do there, and it therefore went undone in my absence. Today, the first day I'd felt at all well in nearly a week, I was unceremoniously handed my final check plus two weeks severance pay and shown to the door of the company which I'd helped to start from the ground up in August of 2001.

I wasn't exactly thunderstruck...this particular storm cloud had been descending ever since the financier who bankrolled us got a whiff of what our little startup could mean once he'd lopped off the pricey, experienced heads of those who got him into this market in the first place. People who lie through smiles, people who shake one hand while stabbing you in the back with the other are a cherished fact of the American way of business, and I'm no Pollyanna. I've been paid and paid well for what I provided these past 22 months, and I'm certain his conscience is clear. For what it is worth, I wasn't even the first to go...someone with 25 years of experience and who was responsible over the past fifteen years for more roofing sales in this market than any other individual had that dubious honor.

I doubt that the back-stabber will lose a lot of sleep over the fact that he reneged on raises, profit sharing, 100% insurance coverage and pretty much every other agreement which we'd all sealed with a handshake back in the days before 9-11. I'm even more certain that he would not be at all disturbed by my evening's activities, which have included figuring out how little of my various and sundry medications I can get by on now that I will have no insurance to limit my monthly med spending to $300.00 instead of the nearly $700.00 it will cost without the Blue Cross copay. Some of it is discretionary...I don't *have* to have arthritis medication, for example. And poverty is excellent motivation to limit one's carbohydrate consumption in order to cut down on one's diabetes meds.

Still and all, I wouldn't need all those things had I lived a better life before now, and so it is with some humility that now begin the arduous task of trying to make sense of the message the Gods are sending me. So far, all I've come up with is "Trust no one until they've proven trustworthy" and "The love of a good woman is more precious than the finest diamonds." The solutions to the current list of life's maladies are going to be tough to find, I fear, but find them I will...or rather, *we* will, my family and I.

And so...suggestions for employment options would be most welcome! I have extensive experience in the construction industry (13 years in commercial roofing office management and administration), with emphasis on Personnel/HR (and the myriad of avenues therein), DOT, OSHA, EEO and Work Comp compliance, payroll, AP/AR, union reporting, certified payroll, Federal/State/Municipal contracts, AIA forms and contracts, roofing construction submittals, warranties, products, MSDS, Municipal Codes, computers and small office applications/networking, most MS applications, writing of contracts and proposals and all other forms of professional business communications, specification and procurement of office equipment and systems, I type on the order of 70 WPM and I provide customer service second to none, in a pleasant and professional manner.

Someone, somewhere, needs someone who is not only like me, but who *is* me. You know where to find me.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Whew, it sure has ben an "interesting" month.
Maybe (the) god(s) are telling you to move?
At least you're secure it the knowledge that it was the robber baron's fault, not yours. Best of luck, man.

[Jakeline]

I'm sorry to hear this has been a trying month. Being laid off is bad enough without having to worry about your children. I'm sure things will work out in the end: the universe has its way of making things balance out. However, the universe likes to take its own sweet time. I often find myself muttering, "Balance NOW, dammit!!"

On the job hunt front, I find that nepotism, networking, and the classified ads work best (in that order ). I got little to no response from online sources. My staffing firms were nice, but had a hard time finding me permanent work.

In the end, I found a great job through the classified ads. As a matter of fact, it isn't even the job I applied for. It worked out for me, and I'm certain it will for you.

[wolf]

Good luck to you, El. Like many other storms you've weathered over the years, you'll get through this one as well.

BB.

[elSicomoro]

Ep, I hope the advice I gave Friday will help. Best wishes to you and your family during this trying time.

[Griff]

I know its a pretty stressful time but is there an opportunity to make any big changes you've been dwelling on? With the school year ending, a change of school districts wouldn't burden the kids as much. I know you're attached to your home but maybe you can kill two birds with one stone. A fresh start for the whole family might be in the offing. Good Luck

[hot_pastrami]

Perhaps I can share an unpopular opinion on your situation... A move is an expensive venture under the best of circumstances, and being recently unemployed, your circumstances would probably not be categorized as "the best." Moreover, relocating, particularly for a whole family, is a trying venture. Moving now may only throw more items on an already tall pile o' worries.

Jakeline's thoughts on balance are along the right thread, I'd say. I beleieve that Karma is a very real thing-- whether you want to look at it as a cosmic energy or just a side-effect of society and human nature-- so things tend to sort themselves out given a little patience. I know that it is pretty ineffective to tell someone that "it will all work out ok," but it really will.

If there's something you've always wanted to do for a living but never pursued because it was too far out of the comfort zone, here's your chance. You've now been rudely ushered out of that comfort zone, so you'd best put yourself where you most want to be before you start to develop the replacement. I can speak from experience... I made the jump from phone support to software development after I was laid off a couple years ago, and now I make twice as much money and like my job almost as much... heheh. It took me a few months and a few books to get there, but I made it. Now I just need to make the jump from software development to my true happy place, graphics design.

Whatever you decide, best wishes to you and the family. Take care and stuff.

[Elspode]

I appreciate all the input, folks, and particular thanks to Syc for some late-night ICQ commiseration.

As it turns out, I am working harder now that I am unemployed than I ever did at my job. Current pursuits include trying to dig out some of the shithole of a house we live in, putting up some superfluous possessions for sale on Ebay, beginning a new roofing-related startup with my longtime coworker (the guy who is still working for the lying scum, but at half salary), searching for another job (went to a headhunter yesterday...oh joy...I am real good at Wordperfect, as it turns out), and training to augment my wife's psychological transcription work here at home as she may have found a full time job with benefits...which we obviously need most desperately right now.

We obtained some help from my wife's family (her grandmother, Gods bless her skinny little neurotic heart), and have paid off our van, saving us four $450.00 monthly payments (Grandma, upon hearing about my unemployment, immediately began interviewing my wife, ascertained that paying off the last four van payments would be good, and then *told* my wife she was going to pay it off for us, and there was to be no argument, period).

In short, things could be worse. We have severely buckled down on our expenditures (are there Aldi's where you guys live?), and are now in fanatical conservation mode on all fronts. Frugality is probably one of those lessons I should have learned or at least practiced over the years, and it seems I am now going to learn it, like it or not. We'll be having a garage sale soon, and I have a bunch more Ebay stuff coming up. Unemployment will start coming in at the end of June, and we may take in a roommate.

We have lived pretty stupidly for a long time, and we have more crap than anyone in our income range has a right to own. Upon consideration of selling one of my two Martin guitars, and knowing that I will likely take a $250 loss on versus its new price (about 25%), I take solace in knowing that this is a smaller loss than a similar sum invested in the stock market would have taken, so I guess I can consider a lot of the things I've bought over past decade as investments, huh?

I'll keep you guys posted on the incredible unemployment saga. Life could be worse, so far, but I've only been unemployed for a week.

Going to the Scott Joplin Festival in Sedalia tomorrow and Saturday courtesy of a generous and very good friend. I'll let you know if it is any good or not, but I expect it to be cool as hell. Ragtime was invented in Missouri, you know! (stated in my best Chekov voice)