Need Some Help - Page 3

Griff · 12-17-2008, 07:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Sarge

Thanks ya'll for being nice. Some things are just to heavy on the soul. Bye

Dude, get out and do something positive for yourself or someone else.

Pooka · 12-17-2008, 09:07 AM

I think the hike is an excellent idea. When I was leaving my ex I highly considered going on a 6 month survival hike from California to Canada.

Everyone is right... you should lay off the booze... tempting as it may be and find a more constructive mode of coping. Don't beat yourself up about decisions you made in your past. Everything happens exactly as it should... if anything else was supposed to have happened it would have. You know the saying follow your bliss? Well... I think it stands to reason that you shouldn't have to give up your passion for someone else.

Out of curiosity... have you spoken to her about any of this before now? Is it possible that she wouldn't want you to leave the military... is it possible that the break up could have been avoided... or that the relationship could be repaired simply through greater communication?

Have you considered counseling?

Treasenuak · 12-18-2008, 10:30 AM

Sarge, if you go away, where am I going to get links for all my kinky sex needs? I need you!

On a more serious note, as a military ex-wife myself, I can say that YES, deployments suck. YES, it's hard on the family, especially when there's kids involved. But personally, it is not an abandonment. I'm sorry your ex-wife saw it that way, and it blows that she was unable to realize the sacrifices YOU were making by doing what you thought was right. Leaving the military is not easy. You're tossed out on your own with no assistance transitioning, no job, and no advice. You go from ON ON ON to off, and no help getting there. I wouldn't recommend giving up your career for your ex; it will honestly make things worse in SEVERAL directions. You'll end up resenting her eventually, when you realize that once again YOU are the one sacrificing. You'll STILL have a hard time transitioning, which will make tension between the two of you worse. Please, PLEASE, think before you do anything. And if you need a pair of comforting arms and a place to stay and someone to keep an eye on you for a while, there's an empty cabin here with your name on it. Let me know.

lumberjim · 12-18-2008, 10:52 AM

do you have a farm that you could ride your ATV around, and maybe some big tires you could flip over to prove your love for her?

go get your wang wet.

DanaC · 12-18-2008, 06:34 PM

Sarge, you ok?

I only just saw this thread. I've read it with mounting concern.

I've no advice to offer beyond what's been said, but I'd like to echo the offers of support *hugs* Let us know you're ok.

Shawnee123 · 12-19-2008, 07:45 AM

We'd like to hear that you are OK, Sarge. Please check in.

limey · 12-19-2008, 01:05 PM

Sarge sighting ... talk to us, we're here for you matey.

limey · 12-21-2008, 05:43 PM

bumpity
Hey Sarge ....

Trilby · 12-21-2008, 06:21 PM

yeah. We need him to check in.

Griff · 12-21-2008, 08:00 PM

C'mon big guy.

Treasenuak · 12-21-2008, 08:14 PM

Big Sarge, CHECK IN. We're very concerned about you and want to know you're okay. PLEASE check in.

Pie · 12-21-2008, 08:23 PM

Add me to the list of the concerned... I hope he just went "walkabout".
Please let us know how you are, Sarge.

Juniper · 12-21-2008, 08:49 PM

Me too.

Sundae · 12-22-2008, 06:01 AM

If Big Sarge posted while drunk he might be embarrassed by this thread.
But if you read this, please update us Sarge - people have shared far more intimate things and also have posted some real crap, especially while drinking. There is genuine concern here - if you don't want to rake up bad feelings by giving us details, just tell us you're still alive and we'll back off until you're ready.

xoxoxoBruce · 12-22-2008, 09:54 PM

Sarge is probably "tied up" as Treasenuak would put it.

12-18-2008, 10:52 AM	#34
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	do you have a farm that you could ride your ATV around, and maybe some big tires you could flip over to prove your love for her? go get your wang wet. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

12-19-2008, 07:45 AM	#36
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	We'd like to hear that you are OK, Sarge. Please check in. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

12-19-2008, 01:05 PM	#37
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Sarge sighting ... talk to us, we're here for you matey. Attached Images __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

12-21-2008, 05:43 PM	#38
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	bumpity Hey Sarge .... __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

12-21-2008, 06:21 PM	#39
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	yeah. We need him to check in. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

12-17-2008, 09:07 AM	#32
Pooka Your Invisible Rabbit Friend Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Betwixt and Between Posts: 528	I think the hike is an excellent idea. When I was leaving my ex I highly considered going on a 6 month survival hike from California to Canada. Everyone is right... you should lay off the booze... tempting as it may be and find a more constructive mode of coping. Don't beat yourself up about decisions you made in your past. Everything happens exactly as it should... if anything else was supposed to have happened it would have. You know the saying follow your bliss? Well... I think it stands to reason that you shouldn't have to give up your passion for someone else. Out of curiosity... have you spoken to her about any of this before now? Is it possible that she wouldn't want you to leave the military... is it possible that the break up could have been avoided... or that the relationship could be repaired simply through greater communication? Have you considered counseling?

12-18-2008, 10:30 AM	#33
Treasenuak Multiorgasmic and wrapped in plastic Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Central Tennessee Posts: 483	Sarge, if you go away, where am I going to get links for all my kinky sex needs? I need you! On a more serious note, as a military ex-wife myself, I can say that YES, deployments suck. YES, it's hard on the family, especially when there's kids involved. But personally, it is not an abandonment. I'm sorry your ex-wife saw it that way, and it blows that she was unable to realize the sacrifices YOU were making by doing what you thought was right. Leaving the military is not easy. You're tossed out on your own with no assistance transitioning, no job, and no advice. You go from ON ON ON to off, and no help getting there. I wouldn't recommend giving up your career for your ex; it will honestly make things worse in SEVERAL directions. You'll end up resenting her eventually, when you realize that once again YOU are the one sacrificing. You'll STILL have a hard time transitioning, which will make tension between the two of you worse. Please, PLEASE, think before you do anything. And if you need a pair of comforting arms and a place to stay and someone to keep an eye on you for a while, there's an empty cabin here with your name on it. Let me know.

12-18-2008, 06:34 PM	#35
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Sarge, you ok? I only just saw this thread. I've read it with mounting concern. I've no advice to offer beyond what's been said, but I'd like to echo the offers of support hugs Let us know you're ok.

12-21-2008, 08:00 PM	#40
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	C'mon big guy. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

12-21-2008, 08:14 PM	#41
Treasenuak Multiorgasmic and wrapped in plastic Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Central Tennessee Posts: 483	Big Sarge, CHECK IN. We're very concerned about you and want to know you're okay. PLEASE check in.

12-21-2008, 08:23 PM	#42
Pie Gone and done Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 4,808	Add me to the list of the concerned... I hope he just went "walkabout". Please let us know how you are, Sarge. __________________ per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.

12-21-2008, 08:49 PM	#43
Juniper I know, right? Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,539	Me too.

12-22-2008, 06:01 AM	#44
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	If Big Sarge posted while drunk he might be embarrassed by this thread. But if you read this, please update us Sarge - people have shared far more intimate things and also have posted some real crap, especially while drinking. There is genuine concern here - if you don't want to rake up bad feelings by giving us details, just tell us you're still alive and we'll back off until you're ready.

12-22-2008, 09:54 PM	#45
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Sarge is probably "tied up" as Treasenuak would put it. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

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