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Parenting Bringing up the shorties so they aren't completely messed up

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Old 03-02-2018, 06:35 PM   #1
monster
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Only in our house....

The college kids are making milkshakes using an electric drill with one of the electric hand whisk blades as an attachment. I was too afraid to take a picture.
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Old 03-02-2018, 06:41 PM   #2
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They apparently like them stirred, not shaken. I don't think James would approve.
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Old 03-02-2018, 09:27 PM   #3
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H. P. James Beestmonster was the one with the drill..... and he was covered in JB weld which is apparently "the world's strongest Bond" so maybe he is revisiting that..... ?
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Old 03-03-2018, 06:53 AM   #4
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Pictures! Although my imagination is serving me well on this one.
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Old 03-03-2018, 07:27 AM   #5
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Old 03-03-2018, 10:19 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glatt View Post
Pictures! Although my imagination is serving me well on this one.
You're a brave man to imagine that
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Old 03-03-2018, 01:57 PM   #7
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Quote:
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I was too afraid to take a picture.
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Old 03-04-2018, 10:41 PM   #8
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Monster, hearing sound of kid wiping out on stairs: "you ok?"

Kid: "yeah, i just stepped on a skull"

only in our house....
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Old 03-05-2018, 12:13 AM   #9
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The best houses are the ones where a kid tumble-thumping is just business as usual.
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Old 03-05-2018, 03:03 PM   #10
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Reminds me:

Friend of mine's wife was tying the shoes of their 2 yr old, whilst he was sitting on the edge of the bar in their house.

She turned around for not even two seconds, and off the bar he went. Head first. I was across the room, too far away to do anything. My heart stopped. The kid landed smack on his head, his neck rolled sickeningly to the side, and he piled up on the living room floor. I knew he was dead. I knew I'd just watched a two yr old die.

She picked him up and set him right back up there. Then she saw my (horrified) face.

Then she said, very simply: "They bounce."

Kid didn't even cry. I very nearly did, but the kid was just fine.
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Old 03-05-2018, 03:53 PM   #11
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Quote:
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The best houses are the ones where a kid tumble-thumping is just business as usual.
My siblings and I used to slide down the stairs on a mattress.
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Old 03-05-2018, 07:43 PM   #12
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(when I say a kid, I guess I do mean a 19yo adult )
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Old 03-05-2018, 09:20 PM   #13
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You may be 19 but as long as you're living under my roof...
Mothers be like that.
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Old 03-05-2018, 10:37 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gravdigr View Post
Reminds me:

Friend of mine's wife was tying the shoes of their 2 yr old, whilst he was sitting on the edge of the bar in their house.

She turned around for not even two seconds, and off the bar he went. Head first. I was across the room, too far away to do anything. My heart stopped. The kid landed smack on his head, his neck rolled sickeningly to the side, and he piled up on the living room floor. I knew he was dead. I knew I'd just watched a two yr old die.

She picked him up and set him right back up there. Then she saw my (horrified) face.

Then she said, very simply: "They bounce."

Kid didn't even cry. I very nearly did, but the kid was just fine.
Some bounce, some smack.

When SonofV was very small, we visted Costco pretty regularly. As a family we'd divide and conquer the tasks at hand, namely waiting in those insane lines and getting some high-grub-factor-cheap-eats just beyond the checkout counters. This time I was on food detail and Tink was waiting in line to pay for our bulk goods. The floor in Costco was concrete, but polished to a high shine, including the area where the snack bar tables were. These were round fiberglass tables with four arms sprouting from the base topped with little round fiberglass discs big enough to rest your buttocks on while you gorged yourself on polish dogs or slices of pizza the size of a flag folded into a cocked hat.

And we did just that, chow down. The food moved faster than the checkout line so when I was done eating, I turned around on my "disc" and leaned back against the table. SonofV was right next to me and... monkey see, monkey do.

And by do, I mean try. As he turned on the seat and leaned back against the table, it was a clean whiff missing the table completely and doing almost a half rotation before the floor arrested his journey to the center of the earth.

His skull hit the concrete right at that place in the back where there's a little bump... I swear I heard a *click* when he went smack. Then one, two beats as he gets a really, really good breath to energize a scream heard throughout the store. I was moving fast, I might've caught him on the first bounce but not before the blood started. You've had a head wound, right? Not a lot of meat up there, but plenty of blood supply.

Costco ... accident response / cleanup on aisle three / whatever crew was *on it*, and strenuously urged us to let them call an ambulance. They could call, but I asserted myself, we were not going to take a ride in the ambulance that costs $1000 when I could leave now and beat the damn ambulance to the ER.

Which we did, that poor kid has a number of scars on his haid. He was ok and is ok, but I'll never forget the meaty smacksound of his noggin on the concrete. **shivers**
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Old 03-06-2018, 02:35 PM   #15
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Quote:
**shivers**
I bet.

I saw that kid tumble off that bar for two months. I saw it in m'sleep, I saw it while driving.
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