Once upon a time...

[mrnoodle]

found some more pennies (aren't you glad).

Contessa, though determined, lacks motivation, for she feels her efforts - ultimately, in the grand scheme of the universe - will not matter.

Hence my point. I'm not saying that Contessa wants to be a hollow rock star per se, but if her motivation is that she "matters" in the grand scheme of things, she sets herself up for disappointment time after time. She will hopefully realize that her contribution to the universe is simply that she lives her life to the best of her ability, without the need for outside motivation or recognition. One day at a time, one act of kindness at a time, doing what is right and letting the chips fall where they may.

I realize now that you and jag were right. My opinion is too heavily skewed by my faith to be a direct parallel with that of someone who doesn't believe in God. Thinking back on it, my lack of "motivation", if you will, to find some meaning in life that is centered around myself is caused by the realization that meaning in life comes from God, and we're all part of a bigger picture. (thankfully, you don't get points taken away for writing train wreck sentences like that one)

Maybe that's why people see religion as a crutch. We believers think that doing the right thing -- on the rare occasions that we are able to achieve this -- is an end unto itself. It strengthens our relationship with God and makes us feel valuable in and of itself. It doesn't mean we're suddenly all vital to the survival of the universe. It does mean that when we start asking questions like Contessa's asking (and we all do), there's an answer close at hand, and other people who have found the same answer can help us on our journey.

yah. so.

[jaguar]

well at least I feel vindicated. It's not necessalarily a bad thing but it is notable.

[Catwoman]

Contessa ponders this and then asks, "Do you think the answer, then, is to take each moment as it comes, and forget about its potential impact or lack thereof? Can one be too consumed by the future and the self to realise that happiness is right now in the moment?"

[mrnoodle]

I think so, to some extent. You have to keep an eye on the future impact of your actions, but not to the point that you're incapable of making split-second decisions. To paraphrase a wise man, all the lights between NY and LA don't have to be green, but if the one in front of you is, go ahead and push the gas. If you can see green for three intersections, push harder. Just keep an eye out for the yellow ones.

[lumberjim]

Originally Posted by Catwoman

Contessa returns slightly abated but *frustrated that the core of her point is being missed.
~snip~
This is not selfish desire for recognition, she realises, but frustration at the workings of a world run by fools. I know what to do! I could make the right decisions! So put ME in the position to do it and the world will breath an enormous sigh of relief.

All I want is rightness and truth. Whoever initiates it, all I want, is for things to be put right.

*here is the elemental flaw in Catwoman. this seems to be a recurrent theme in her threads, no? ( oh yeah, why are we still calling you Contessa?)

You're SOOOO deep. no one could be as deep as you.....it just doesn't make sense. we just don;t get it, do we?

guh. get over yourself. you're just as unique as everyone else. Don't you see that truly remarkable people don't sit around pining away about being remarkable? they're too busy perfecting whatever it is that makes them remarkable. They don't do it BECAUSE they want to be remarkable. They do it for the love of doing it, or a need of some sort. You read too many fairy tales or something. Snap out of it. you're not that perceptive. you're not even all that smart. not stupid, mind you, but christ. get a grip. Your philisophical masturbation is beginning to irk me. Don't you think we ALL feel like there just might be something better out there for us?

Here's what you want to do:

Address your basic needs. Be glad of it. do something that you enjoy. be with people you like to be with. take pleasure in that, and recognize that those very simple things are rare and remarkable enough. really.

[lumberjim]

oh, yeah. i forgot: Contessa is a fruity assclown

[lookout123]

If you consistantly try to do the right thing then you don't have to stress as much over the future impact of those actions. misteps will happen, but they are impossible to avoid no matter what path you choose. regardless of holding a spiritual faith, you can choose to treat people with courtesy and respect, tell the truth - even when you would rather not, do your good deeds for the sake of helping someone - not for the fuzzy feeling you get, encourage those around you - don't tear them down, apologize when you slip up, do the best that you know how to do with each task at hand.

if you set your mind to living in this manner with an outward focus - meaning that your focus is on helping others rather than how it makes you feel - you will most likely find this peace you seem to be looking for.

professional and social recognition come and go, sometimes even to the people who deserve it. the people who most deserve recognition generally go unnoticed, which is exactly how many of them prefer it.

[Trilby]

Ah, well. My lonely I was good at what I did for money. Very good. I didn't take pride in doing it, though, because I felt that any trained monkey could do what I was doing. I went into the thing thinking I wanted to "HELP" people. I ended up a psychological mess and blubbery baby over something I thought was my "calling". Maybe I'm a wuss. I prefer to think of it as a learning experience and learn the most important thing: I matter, I have value and I can love myself.
Que But seriously, I'd be much happier making People love them and people love the ones who make them!
How, you ask, does this help CW quest? It doesn't. I just wanted her to know that other people experience angst, too.

[Beestie]

Maybe Contessa Linoleum should consider that if the world isn't giving her what she needs than maybe its because she's not giving the world what it needs.

[Catwoman]

And it is precisely because I am

Originally Posted by lumberjim

just as unique as everyone else

that I started this thread, and called myself Contessa. I know that

Originally Posted by Brianna

other people experience angst

and if you remember I said that

Originally Posted by Catwoman

not only is she capable of anything, so is everyone, and that they simply lack the vision or encouragement or awareness to know it.

So it pains me when I hear

Originally Posted by lumberjim

Don't you think we ALL feel like there just might be something better out there for us?

because this confirms what I knew all along: that we are all the same. I was demonstrating by revealing my inner thoughts (that most people would be too embarrassed to admit) that we all think the same. We all think we're special/unique/destined for greatness. I thought by examining this thought process in painful detail (using me as an example, as usual) this might become clear.

Originally Posted by lumberjim

Don't you see that truly remarkable people don't sit around pining away about being remarkable?

How do you know? Remember that we're all the same. There are no god-men, with zero ego and mighty conscience. Even Mother Teresa will have doubted herself, wondered about god, and hoped she was remarkable. She was only unique in that she acted on her hopes and dreams.

Originally Posted by lumberjim

You read too many fairy tales or something. Snap out of it. you're not that perceptive. you're not even all that smart. not stupid, mind you, but christ. get a grip. Your philisophical masturbation is beginning to irk me.

Yes, yes, all this is true. But physical masturbation at work would really get me into trouble. (And wtf's a fruity assclown?)

Originally Posted by Beestie

Maybe Contessa Linoleum should consider that if the world isn't giving her what she needs than maybe its because she's not giving the world what it needs.

Yes, true again. Yep, that ones got me stumped. Absolutely right.

[wolf]

The Contessa needs to look at her definition of "remarkable" and her need to be so.

What makes one "remarkable," Contessa?

And why is that your greatest need?

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by Catwoman

...this confirms what I knew all along: that we are all the same. I was demonstrating by revealing my inner thoughts (that most people would be too embarrassed to admit) that we all think the same. We all think we're special/unique/destined for greatness. I thought by examining this thought process in painful detail (using me as an example, as usual) this might become clear.

Ah, NOW it's a true Catwoman thread. After a reasonable discussion wherein she asks for answers, she does a quick 180 and begins to claim that she was leading us all along, just trying to teach us closed-minded sheep what the important things in life are.

I submit that you did not "know all along" anything. You had a moment of self-doubt, started a thread about it, got many responses on other ways to look at and solve your problem--and now that you're feeling better, your defense mechanism has kicked in to prevent you from admitting you genuinely sought help from other people. You now act as if you revealed your inner thoughts (which you acknowledge would be embarassing for some other people...) solely because you had a philisophical point to make.

I think that it is this intellectual dishonesty with yourself that causes you to feel unfulfilled and unremarkable. Because you fundamentally feel all people are unremarkable, and your way of trying to rise above that is by "teaching" others, convincing yourself that you know and understand more than they do. If instead you can look at the glass as half-full, i.e. everyone is remarkable, and find satisfaction in what you are already doing and being, then you won't need to whitewash your self-doubt as being merely a philisophical exercise.

[Catwoman]

No no no I did start off genuinely asking for help! None of it was made up! I just knew I wouldn't be the only one, so I tried to make it into a story. It also eased the reading process instead of saying 'I' all the time.

All I know is that we're all the same. I don't know anything else, and I'm not pretending to string you along so I can usurp answers without admitting ignorance. Most of your answers have really helped me, yes me personally, but it is still true that when I started writing I didn't want to claim ownership of these thoughts, or uniqueness, because I know everyone else is the same! Make more sense now?

[Catwoman]

Originally Posted by wolf

The Contessa needs to look at her definition of "remarkable" and her need to be so. What makes one "remarkable," Contessa?

Worthy of remark. Noted. Acclaimed. Intelligent. Superior. Inimitable.

Originally Posted by wolf

And why is that your greatest need?

Probably because I am none of the above.

[wolf]

Are you so sure?

Or do you just think that you are not allowed to accept those positive qualities of yourself, because nice girls don't brag, and you don't want to make yourself seem superiour, do you?

(tough to take this from someone who you are convinced only thinks of you as a bloody great prat, isn't it?)