Naming Your Child

Kitsune · 06-11-2004, 09:57 AM

Ever come across someone and wonder what their parents were thinking when they named them? Sometime ago, I was on a conference call for work when we heard someone call in late. The moderator paused and asked who had joined.

"Walter."
"Walter, what's your last name?"
"Melon."

...

There was a long pause from the group. Yep: Walter Melon. It was so distracting and I couldn't stop from cracking up, eventually having to mute the phone. How is it that someone like that gets through their childhood years? How do you grow up and not hate your parents for it? I can't imagine the daily torture that the poor guy must have gone through.

Ah, I suppose it could be worse, though.

Good morning, class! My name is...

I hope that is a mistake.

wolf · 06-11-2004, 10:22 AM

Once someone gets the courage to explain it to her, she'll be asking people to "just call me Susan."

I have a list of favorites. There are numerous "What were you thinkings" that we've collected over the years at work.

Oh crap. I think I can't tell you some of the best ones because of HIPPA. :P I'll have to go through the list and find the ones that weren't patients.

Oh, wait ... this guy's a probation officer, so I can tell yah ...

Shane Shady.

SteveDallas · 06-11-2004, 12:13 PM

See, we actually thought about all this crap... we wanted names that were common enough that people would know them, but not the big common names everybody was using. And we wanted names with only one spelling, and we made sure the initials didn't spell anything embarassing.

Clodfobble · 06-11-2004, 12:19 PM

You can't plan for everything. My parents thought they chose the perfect name, common, no obvious mocking nicknames arising from it, no strange spellings... end result? I hate my name because it's so boring.

To that end I plan on giving my kids more interesting (though not outright weird) names, and I'm sure they'll resent them for their own reasons just like me.

06-11-2004, 12:26 PM

I once had a neigbor who had the last name of "Rule." He named his two kids "Slide" and "Golden." I kid you not. I always liked my first name until Bill Clinton came along. At the time I was working a job that required us to wear name tags. The joke got old before I heard the first one.

ladysycamore · 06-11-2004, 01:33 PM

LOL, ok. When I worked in the fraud department of Fleet Bank, I had to make outbound calls to cardholders and verify their card activity. You had to make these calls through a dialer, which would bring up the customer automatically. You could manually work the dialer as well. If you could not get in touch with the customer, you had the option of sending a letter with a number that they could call Fleet to verify the activity.

Well, I would come across the strangest names, especially if they were not English names. Imagine my surprise when the name:

"Ding Ding"

came up on my screen. No way was I talking to that person (I was laughing too damned hard), so they got the letter.

Another name I came across (not at Fleet, but at another job):

Bhang Pow

Hope I'm not breaking any laws by revealing those names...heh!

dar512 · 06-11-2004, 02:40 PM

I worked with a guy named Warren Pete

A gal I met at a party has a teenage daughter. There is a set of twins in her daughter's class. Their first names are pronounced

o-ran-gel-o
and
le-mon-gel-o

emphasis on the second syllable

They are written like this:

Orangejello
Lemonjello

ladysycamore · 06-11-2004, 03:16 PM

Oh how could I ever forget THIS name:

Scenario: Radio station in Baltimore. DJ asks people to call up and give shout outs.

DJ: "Yeah hellooo who's this?"

Caller: "Yeah um hi. My name is Shayleilakweykwey!" (since there is no way I could spell this properly, I am spelling it the way it sounded.)

DJ: "Shayleila who-what??!!"

Caller: "Shayleilakweykwey!"

DJ: "Is that your whole name?"

Caller: "No that's my first name!"

I cried rivers of laughter on that one. That had to be THE most ghetto name in the history of names!!!

jaguar · 06-11-2004, 03:37 PM

Quote:

Orangejello
Lemonjello

Their mum should be inprisoned over that, talk about cruel and unusual.

Clodfobble · 06-11-2004, 04:02 PM

I've heard of the brothers Orangejello and Lemonjello many times over the last few years... I think it's an urban legend.

Lady Sidhe · 06-11-2004, 04:02 PM

We named our daughter Ashlynn Illyrica Winter. TS picked out the first name, I picked out the second (it's the name of an ancient greek city that I once read about, and I thought it was pretty), and Winter---well, it's a pretty name, and she was born when there was, unexpectedly in La., snow on the ground.

Ashlynn is just normal enough. Illyrica is pretty much unique, and Winter is just pretty.

I hate common, or overly popular names....I wanted her to have a name that no one else had.

xoxoxoBruce · 06-11-2004, 05:06 PM

Heywood Jablowme.

DanaC · 06-11-2004, 05:08 PM

If i recall correctly I think in Germany and also France you cant just pick a name out the air for your child. The name that goes on their birth certificate has to conform to certain standards.

06-11-2004, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DanaC
If i recall correctly I think in Germany and also France you cant just pick a name out the air for your child. The name that goes on their birth certificate has to conform to certain standards.

Mine conformed to standards at the time and a lot of good that ended up doing me.

Clodfobble · 06-11-2004, 05:20 PM

In Canada too, the government can reject your child's name and make you pick a new one.

06-11-2004, 09:57 AM	#1
Kitsune still eats dirt Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Tampa, FL Posts: 3,031	Naming Your Child Ever come across someone and wonder what their parents were thinking when they named them? Sometime ago, I was on a conference call for work when we heard someone call in late. The moderator paused and asked who had joined. "Walter." "Walter, what's your last name?" "Melon." ... There was a long pause from the group. Yep: Walter Melon. It was so distracting and I couldn't stop from cracking up, eventually having to mute the phone. How is it that someone like that gets through their childhood years? How do you grow up and not hate your parents for it? I can't imagine the daily torture that the poor guy must have gone through. Ah, I suppose it could be worse, though. Good morning, class! My name is... I hope that is a mistake. Last edited by Kitsune; 06-11-2004 at 10:06 AM.

06-11-2004, 10:22 AM	#2
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Once someone gets the courage to explain it to her, she'll be asking people to "just call me Susan." I have a list of favorites. There are numerous "What were you thinkings" that we've collected over the years at work. Oh crap. I think I can't tell you some of the best ones because of HIPPA. :P I'll have to go through the list and find the ones that weren't patients. Oh, wait ... this guy's a probation officer, so I can tell yah ... Shane Shady. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

06-11-2004, 01:33 PM	#6
ladysycamore "I may not always be perfect, but I'm always me." Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: In Sycamore's boxers Posts: 1,341	LOL, ok. When I worked in the fraud department of Fleet Bank, I had to make outbound calls to cardholders and verify their card activity. You had to make these calls through a dialer, which would bring up the customer automatically. You could manually work the dialer as well. If you could not get in touch with the customer, you had the option of sending a letter with a number that they could call Fleet to verify the activity. Well, I would come across the strangest names, especially if they were not English names. Imagine my surprise when the name: "Ding Ding" came up on my screen. No way was I talking to that person (I was laughing too damned hard), so they got the letter. Another name I came across (not at Fleet, but at another job): Bhang Pow Hope I'm not breaking any laws by revealing those names...heh! __________________ "Freedom is not given. It is our right at birth. But there are some moments when it must be taken." ~Tagline from the movie "Amistad"~ "The Akan concept of Sankofa: In order to move forward we first have to take a step back. In other words, before we can be prepared for the future, we must comprehend the past." From "We Did It, They Hid It"

06-11-2004, 03:16 PM	#8
ladysycamore "I may not always be perfect, but I'm always me." Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: In Sycamore's boxers Posts: 1,341	Oh how could I ever forget THIS name: Scenario: Radio station in Baltimore. DJ asks people to call up and give shout outs. DJ: "Yeah hellooo who's this?" Caller: "Yeah um hi. My name is Shayleilakweykwey!" (since there is no way I could spell this properly, I am spelling it the way it sounded.) DJ: "Shayleila who-what??!!" Caller: "Shayleilakweykwey!" DJ: "Is that your whole name?" Caller: "No that's my first name!" I cried rivers of laughter on that one. That had to be THE most ghetto name in the history of names!!! __________________ "Freedom is not given. It is our right at birth. But there are some moments when it must be taken." ~Tagline from the movie "Amistad"~ "The Akan concept of Sankofa: In order to move forward we first have to take a step back. In other words, before we can be prepared for the future, we must comprehend the past." From "We Did It, They Hid It"

06-11-2004, 04:02 PM	#11
Lady Sidhe That's my story and I'm stickin' to it.... Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Hammond, La. Posts: 978	We named our daughter Ashlynn Illyrica Winter. TS picked out the first name, I picked out the second (it's the name of an ancient greek city that I once read about, and I thought it was pretty), and Winter---well, it's a pretty name, and she was born when there was, unexpectedly in La., snow on the ground. Ashlynn is just normal enough. Illyrica is pretty much unique, and Winter is just pretty. I hate common, or overly popular names....I wanted her to have a name that no one else had. __________________ My free will...I never leave home without it. --House Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. -Rita Rudner

06-11-2004, 12:13 PM	#3
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	See, we actually thought about all this crap... we wanted names that were common enough that people would know them, but not the big common names everybody was using. And we wanted names with only one spelling, and we made sure the initials didn't spell anything embarassing.

06-11-2004, 12:19 PM	#4
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	You can't plan for everything. My parents thought they chose the perfect name, common, no obvious mocking nicknames arising from it, no strange spellings... end result? I hate my name because it's so boring. To that end I plan on giving my kids more interesting (though not outright weird) names, and I'm sure they'll resent them for their own reasons just like me.

06-11-2004, 12:26 PM	#5
marichiko Guest Posts: n/a	I once had a neigbor who had the last name of "Rule." He named his two kids "Slide" and "Golden." I kid you not. I always liked my first name until Bill Clinton came along. At the time I was working a job that required us to wear name tags. The joke got old before I heard the first one.

06-11-2004, 02:40 PM	#7
dar512 dar512 is now Pete Zicato Join Date: May 2003 Location: Chicago suburb Posts: 4,968	I worked with a guy named Warren Pete A gal I met at a party has a teenage daughter. There is a set of twins in her daughter's class. Their first names are pronounced o-ran-gel-o and le-mon-gel-o emphasis on the second syllable They are written like this: Orangejello Lemonjello

06-11-2004, 05:06 PM	#12
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Heywood Jablowme. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

06-11-2004, 05:08 PM	#13
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	If i recall correctly I think in Germany and also France you cant just pick a name out the air for your child. The name that goes on their birth certificate has to conform to certain standards.

06-11-2004, 05:20 PM	#15
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	In Canada too, the government can reject your child's name and make you pick a new one.

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