11/29/2002: Swiss cow choppered home

Undertoad · 11-29-2002, 10:59 AM

Happy Friday. They have some massive mudslides in Switzerland, and after a particular mudslide there were 60 cows that were marooned from their usual home. They had to be airlifted to get back. No word on whether the grassy hills behind are where the cows came from. (Look at that, though - some of those fields are on a 60 degree angle. Farming in the Alps.)

Tobiasly · 11-29-2002, 11:16 AM

Good luck Bessie! Hang in there!

dasviper · 11-30-2002, 10:14 AM

Does it occur to anyone else that the cost of 60 new cows might be less than the cost of airlifting 60 cows one-at-a-time?

Degrees · 11-30-2002, 10:58 AM

Except that: what are you going to do with the old 60 cows? Turn them into steaks? Well... lets look at the steps. I could see this becoming a Laurel and Hardy (Or Dumb and Dumber) skit real quick:

Airlift the butcher in

For each cow, (up to sixty times):

Chase down a cow.
Kill it (this will make chasing down the other cows so much easier).
Field dress 500 to 2000 lbs of beef
Airlift the meat out before it spoils

And finally, when done,

Airlift the butcher out
Airlift people in to dispose of 60 carcass

No one it going to stand for the rancher just letting the cows starve to death (or breaking their legs trying to cross the mudslide).

And bringing the butcher in, and airlifting the meat out doesn't appear to be workable. (I believe that modern butchers get to work on a carcass that hangs from a track, so that they can slice off cuts without trouble).

So ultimately, airlifting the cows out is probably the most expedient. Although....

If the land was cut off my a mudslide, won't they eventually (re-) build a road to the stranded area? Why not just ATV in a bunch of hay bales until the road gets rebuilt? Or wait untill the snows come, which will freeze the mud so that the cows can walk on it?

Eh. Happy Cows come from California.

helen · 11-30-2002, 06:04 PM

I think most cows in Switzerland are dairy cows, so we'd have to air lift the milk maids and their billowy patterned skirts would , well, billow out - exposing the lederhosen- causing young Swiss boys to yodel for joy and would cause a sales rush for Ricola.

Gotta save those cows, they provide the main ingredient in CHOCOLATE for goodness sakes.

dasviper · 11-30-2002, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by helen
...causing young Swiss boys to yodel for joy and would cause a sales rush for Ricola.....

No to mention more mudslides, and we fall into a vicious cycle.

xoxoxoBruce · 12-01-2002, 06:54 PM

DAMN! Cost / benefit?
Didn't any of you live on a farm.
Cows are family!!!!!!!!

MaggieL · 12-01-2002, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by xoxoxoBruce

Didn't any of you live on a farm.
Cows are family!!!!!!!!

That's a misdemenor in Pennsylvania.

dasviper · 12-01-2002, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MaggieL

That's a misdemenor in Pennsylvania.

What, bovine marriage, or familial butchery?

MaggieL · 12-01-2002, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dasviper
What, bovine marriage, or familial butchery?

Animal...erm..."husbandry". :-)

Undertoad · 12-01-2002, 09:37 PM

Once again showing how the laws are made for Philadelphia and Pittsburgh, to the demerit of everyone in between.

wolf · 12-01-2002, 09:42 PM

Wasn't it James Carville who pointed out that Pennsylvania was Philadelphia and Pittsburgh with Alabama in the middle?

elSicomoro · 12-01-2002, 09:43 PM

Don't ask, don't tell.

wolf · 12-01-2002, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by slang
<a href="http://us.f1.yahoofs.com/users/21b7c626/bc/cow-2.au?BCEcs69Acm8zd8Ox"><IMG src="http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/tsmileys/l.gif"></a>
Yes, as a matter of fact, I do have a lot of time on my hands..

The link to the file seems not to be working.

I like the moocow pic tho'.

verbatim · 12-01-2002, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by wolf
Wasn't it James Carville who pointed out that Pennsylvania was Philadelphia and Pittsburgh with Alabama in the middle?

Ahem. Harrisburg and its suburbs arent bad. Cow country is Lancaster and Lebanon. For hicks, yea, thats Perry county. One stoplight and going strong........

11-29-2002, 10:59 AM	#1
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	11/29/2002: Swiss cow choppered home Happy Friday. They have some massive mudslides in Switzerland, and after a particular mudslide there were 60 cows that were marooned from their usual home. They had to be airlifted to get back. No word on whether the grassy hills behind are where the cows came from. (Look at that, though - some of those fields are on a 60 degree angle. Farming in the Alps.)

11-30-2002, 10:14 AM	#3
dasviper Belt Conveyor Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Hanover, NH, USA Posts: 67	Cost/Benefit? Does it occur to anyone else that the cost of 60 new cows might be less than the cost of airlifting 60 cows one-at-a-time?

11-30-2002, 10:58 AM	#4
Degrees Resident Denizen Join Date: May 2001 Location: Visalia, CA Posts: 62	Re: Cost/Benefit Except that: what are you going to do with the old 60 cows? Turn them into steaks? Well... lets look at the steps. I could see this becoming a Laurel and Hardy (Or Dumb and Dumber) skit real quick: Airlift the butcher in For each cow, (up to sixty times): Chase down a cow. Kill it (this will make chasing down the other cows so much easier). Field dress 500 to 2000 lbs of beef Airlift the meat out before it spoils And finally, when done, Airlift the butcher out Airlift people in to dispose of 60 carcass No one it going to stand for the rancher just letting the cows starve to death (or breaking their legs trying to cross the mudslide). And bringing the butcher in, and airlifting the meat out doesn't appear to be workable. (I believe that modern butchers get to work on a carcass that hangs from a track, so that they can slice off cuts without trouble). So ultimately, airlifting the cows out is probably the most expedient. Although.... If the land was cut off my a mudslide, won't they eventually (re-) build a road to the stranded area? Why not just ATV in a bunch of hay bales until the road gets rebuilt? Or wait untill the snows come, which will freeze the mud so that the cows can walk on it? Eh. Happy Cows come from California.

12-01-2002, 09:42 PM	#12
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Wasn't it James Carville who pointed out that Pennsylvania was Philadelphia and Pittsburgh with Alabama in the middle? __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-29-2002, 11:16 AM	#2
Tobiasly hot Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Jeffersonville, IN (near Louisville) Posts: 892	Good luck Bessie! Hang in there!

11-30-2002, 06:04 PM	#5
helen Pithy Euphemist Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Canada Posts: 19	I think most cows in Switzerland are dairy cows, so we'd have to air lift the milk maids and their billowy patterned skirts would , well, billow out - exposing the lederhosen- causing young Swiss boys to yodel for joy and would cause a sales rush for Ricola. Gotta save those cows, they provide the main ingredient in CHOCOLATE for goodness sakes.

12-01-2002, 06:54 PM	#7
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	DAMN! Cost / benefit? Didn't any of you live on a farm. Cows are family!!!!!!!!

12-01-2002, 09:37 PM	#11
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	Once again showing how the laws are made for Philadelphia and Pittsburgh, to the demerit of everyone in between.

12-01-2002, 09:43 PM	#13
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	Don't ask, don't tell.

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