SO... FRUSTRATED... - Page 4

Troubleshooter · 05-01-2005, 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by perth

He won't eat mac and cheese either, which is just wierd.

And communist to boot.

SmurfAbuser · 05-02-2005, 08:30 AM

My kid was super picky and hated everything I made. Eventually it got to the point where I stopped catering to his pickiness and he got over it. If you don't like what everyone else is eating for dinner, you can sit it out. Eventually they WILL get hungry and will have to eat what is there. It's kinda cool, because he tried stuff (ie vegetables) that he would never touch before, and actually likes some of them now.

wolf · 05-02-2005, 09:46 AM

My friend's pediatrician told her, "no child has ever starved to death because they refused to eat. Don't cater to him."

Somehow, the child made it to adolescence, so the doctor must have been correct.

Clodfobble · 05-02-2005, 10:02 AM

Well, he'll be with us for six weeks this summer, so we'll see how it goes. No more holding out just till he makes it back to his mom's house.

Perth--same here, no mac and cheese, as well as no pizza, no spaghetti, no chicken soup, no hamburgers, no ketchup, no bananas... completely communist.

footfootfoot · 05-02-2005, 12:56 PM

Clodfobble,
We have been reading Penelope Leach's books on babies, toddlers, and those sort of people.

Quote:

Many consider child development specialist Penelope Leach to be Dr. T. Berry Brazelton's British counterpart. Her book, Your Baby and Child: From Birth to Age Five, is a now a childrearing classic; she has also received acclaim for her recent volume, Children First. Readers admire Leach for her elegant writing style and her remarkable ability to make accessible the feelings and perspectives of babies and very young children.

It is really eye opening (presuming you haven't stabbed them out already) to think about these situations from the perspective of the toddler.

Here is a link to a site with excerpts from her book. http://www.babycentre.co.uk/general/539903 I'd get it if I were you. It's like a toddler instruction manual/troubleshooting guide combined with a translation dictionary.

She's British, so you do run the risk that your kid will grow up spelling 'color' colour. You can probably pass as Canadian though. Well, maybe not with a Texas accent.

Good luck

OnyxCougar · 05-02-2005, 04:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

It is really eye opening (presuming you haven't stabbed them out already)

'

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Clodfobble · 06-16-2005, 08:22 AM

5 days into summer vacation, we have won the war. Break out the "Mission Accomplished" banner.

I took him to the grocery store to specifically pick out foods that he might like to eat for his lunches during the day. Two of the things he picked out were baby carrots and cherry tomatoes. (He still rejected many other things, so I assumed he must have had these before and knew he liked them.) That evening at dinner, he refused to even put them in his mouth. We told him that it was his choice not to eat, but it was our choice what to serve. He ate nothing.

So we had carrots and tomatoes for breakfast. He ate nothing. We had them for lunch. Still nothing. By dinnertime, he had gone for 30 hours without eating anything (and drinking only a little water), and was acting somewhat woozy but steadfastly refusing to eat even a single bite of carrot. He kept asking me to spank him or put him in time out, but I just told him we were absolutely NOT going to punish him for not eating because that was his choice, and that we would just wait patiently until he was hungry enough to eat a bite of carrots or tomatoes.

For dinner, we added to his plate of tomatoes and carrots some of what we were having for dinner (chicken and penne pasta in mustard cream sauce with cranberries and mushrooms and almonds,) which he has also always refused. He shoveled it into his mouth, and announced that he DID like it after all, surprise surprise! We abandoned the carrots and tomatoes at that point, but for breakfast the next day we gave him something new (strawberry-banana smoothie) and he ate it. That night for dinner he ate both macaroni and cheese and baked beans, which he had ALSO refused on every occasion before.

Last night, though, we had real proof that we had won. He had dug in and refused to eat his peas (unlike the other new foods, which he had just decided to eat in the first place), and I was calmly explaining that that was fine, but we would have to have peas for breakfast then, and he sighed and said, "Alright..." and ate a bite of peas. Just like that.

I. WIN.

PH34R my l33t D1sciplin4ry 5KillZ.

Later, my husband and the kids were watching an old Robotech episode, and he declared that the main character ate HIS peas too. We agreed--I mean, after all, he's got to be strong to fight all the bad robots, right?

I am somewhat worried that carrots and tomatoes have been permanently demonized in his mind, but I can live with that.

Undertoad · 06-16-2005, 08:40 AM

Great story, and good work by you!

LabRat · 06-16-2005, 10:03 AM

Suh-Weet! Nice job, not only will your relationship be better because that tension will be gone, the little rugrat will be a little heathier with some variety in his diet. Gotta admire going for 30 hrs with no food, I have never gone more than 12. Hope he uses that power for good, not evil when he's older and wiser

BigV · 06-16-2005, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

--snip--
I. WIN.

PH34R my l33t D1sciplin4ry 5KillZ.

--snip--

Great story, and what a happy ending!

I would respectfully offer that, yes, you did win, but so did he. He won a meal (30 hrs!), he won an understanding that the foods he relented on were ok, he won and understanding that food's for eating not punishment or reward. But most importantly, he won the confidence that you're (plural) trustworthy. You said it, you meant it, and it happened. You're reliable, you can be counted on. And that's HUGE. It's only ok to venture into territory unknown if there's a sure retreat to safety. You gave him that assurance, you're a rock.

My congratulations to you all. :applause:

warch · 06-17-2005, 04:14 PM

My cagey mom had my brother and me convinced that peas were really "proton energy pills". (I still believe it is true.)

footfootfoot · 06-18-2005, 10:01 PM

Awesome Clodfobble!

I can't really add to what BigV said.

I remember someone once saying the trick is not to make threats but to make promises.

It was also wonderful that food didn't become an arena for punishment and discipline, but was matter of fact: this is what is for dinner.

05-02-2005, 09:46 AM	#48
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	My friend's pediatrician told her, "no child has ever starved to death because they refused to eat. Don't cater to him." Somehow, the child made it to adolescence, so the doctor must have been correct. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

06-16-2005, 08:22 AM	#52
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	A winner is me!! 5 days into summer vacation, we have won the war. Break out the "Mission Accomplished" banner. I took him to the grocery store to specifically pick out foods that he might like to eat for his lunches during the day. Two of the things he picked out were baby carrots and cherry tomatoes. (He still rejected many other things, so I assumed he must have had these before and knew he liked them.) That evening at dinner, he refused to even put them in his mouth. We told him that it was his choice not to eat, but it was our choice what to serve. He ate nothing. So we had carrots and tomatoes for breakfast. He ate nothing. We had them for lunch. Still nothing. By dinnertime, he had gone for 30 hours without eating anything (and drinking only a little water), and was acting somewhat woozy but steadfastly refusing to eat even a single bite of carrot. He kept asking me to spank him or put him in time out, but I just told him we were absolutely NOT going to punish him for not eating because that was his choice, and that we would just wait patiently until he was hungry enough to eat a bite of carrots or tomatoes. For dinner, we added to his plate of tomatoes and carrots some of what we were having for dinner (chicken and penne pasta in mustard cream sauce with cranberries and mushrooms and almonds,) which he has also always refused. He shoveled it into his mouth, and announced that he DID like it after all, surprise surprise! We abandoned the carrots and tomatoes at that point, but for breakfast the next day we gave him something new (strawberry-banana smoothie) and he ate it. That night for dinner he ate both macaroni and cheese and baked beans, which he had ALSO refused on every occasion before. Last night, though, we had real proof that we had won. He had dug in and refused to eat his peas (unlike the other new foods, which he had just decided to eat in the first place), and I was calmly explaining that that was fine, but we would have to have peas for breakfast then, and he sighed and said, "Alright..." and ate a bite of peas. Just like that. I. WIN. PH34R my l33t D1sciplin4ry 5KillZ. Later, my husband and the kids were watching an old Robotech episode, and he declared that the main character ate HIS peas too. We agreed--I mean, after all, he's got to be strong to fight all the bad robots, right? I am somewhat worried that carrots and tomatoes have been permanently demonized in his mind, but I can live with that.

06-16-2005, 10:03 AM	#54
LabRat twatfaced two legged bumhole Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 3,143	Suh-Weet! Nice job, not only will your relationship be better because that tension will be gone, the little rugrat will be a little heathier with some variety in his diet. Gotta admire going for 30 hrs with no food, I have never gone more than 12. Hope he uses that power for good, not evil when he's older and wiser __________________ Strength does not come from how much weight you can lift, or how many miles you can run. It comes from knowing that you set a goal, and rose to the challenge. Strength comes from within.

06-18-2005, 10:01 PM	#57
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Awesome Clodfobble! I can't really add to what BigV said. I remember someone once saying the trick is not to make threats but to make promises. It was also wonderful that food didn't become an arena for punishment and discipline, but was matter of fact: this is what is for dinner. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

05-02-2005, 08:30 AM	#47
SmurfAbuser Simulated Simulacrum Join Date: Mar 2005 Posts: 39	My kid was super picky and hated everything I made. Eventually it got to the point where I stopped catering to his pickiness and he got over it. If you don't like what everyone else is eating for dinner, you can sit it out. Eventually they WILL get hungry and will have to eat what is there. It's kinda cool, because he tried stuff (ie vegetables) that he would never touch before, and actually likes some of them now.

05-02-2005, 10:02 AM	#49
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	Well, he'll be with us for six weeks this summer, so we'll see how it goes. No more holding out just till he makes it back to his mom's house. Perth--same here, no mac and cheese, as well as no pizza, no spaghetti, no chicken soup, no hamburgers, no ketchup, no bananas... completely communist.

06-16-2005, 08:40 AM	#53
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	Great story, and good work by you!

06-17-2005, 04:14 PM	#56
warch lurkin old school Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Minnesota Posts: 2,796	My cagey mom had my brother and me convinced that peas were really "proton energy pills". (I still believe it is true.)

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