"A Fat Rant"

[Aliantha]

Because you're submitting to the stereotype you're perpetuating the cycle.

What about being recognized in your particular profession for your skill?

Isn't that what it's all about?

Edit: I just don't buy the line about getting further ahead because you look better. In the real world, that's not how it is.

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by 9th Engineer

Apparently this is not acceptable for some people who take it upon themselves to let me know that I am helping to perpetuate a stereotype, and that I should be ashamed of the harm I am supposedly causing.

That's really the only reason why I tend to keep an antenna out for people saying that weight loss is bad.

For goodness sake - if you feel losing a little weight and buffing up are minor adjustments for you and fall within your comfort zone then of course you shouldn't feel you are compromising your integrity doing so. Next time a woman (and I assume it is women who do so) brings this up, suggest she attends her next interview without make-up or hair products. And then have a conversation about level playing fields and appearance-pressure.

It's trickier once you get into the realms of how people damage their own health. I know - I am morbidly obese and can't see any way out of my current cycle of self destruct apart from killing myself. No-one could engender any more disgust in my physical self than I already have. But then I'm depressed, so I'm not a fair comparison...

[9th Engineer]

Believe me, I'm not worried about not being noticed for my skill. I'm entering my third year of college and I'm working in a functional neuroanatomy lab under a newly transfered Stanford prof who's one of the top in his field. I beat out 300 other students for this job and I'm damn proud of it.
I don't hold grandiose notions of what I'm trying to accomplish, just one part of continually refining myself. I'm also trying to get through a reading list that includes books that are simply good to have as part of an education. A Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich is my current project. Just part of improving myself. It's the idea that I'm a bigot for considering healthy weight loss an improvement that gets me riled.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Originally Posted by 9th Engineer

snip~Apparently this is not acceptable for some people who take it upon themselves to let me know that I am helping to perpetuate a stereotype, and that I should be ashamed of the harm I am supposedly causing.

Fuck them... if they, and everyone else, minded their own business, there wouldn't be a stereotype problem.

[Cicero]

My boss is very over- weight. She is very attractive still. (well I think so) When we go out to lunch together people get a disgusted look on their face when they see her. No one hides the looks or the staring. There's nothing worse than watching an ugly, old, bald, witless man give her crusty looks. Makes me want to to go kick some a_ _. What? Is society going to shame on her until she loses weight? People like that suck. And they're ugly.....

[9th Engineer]

I've actually talked about that before in context. I once took the counter-stance in a debate that men would be lucky to have a men's cosmetics industry, because right now we still have to walk past Polo and Ralph Lauren ads but would need to almost be born perfect to attain anything close.

[bluecuracao]

Originally Posted by 9th Engineer

I rarely care about other people's weight, but I've been the target of attention in situations like in my first post because of my own motivation for losing weight. I'm at a reasonable weight right now, 167 for a 6'1'' guy. No abs, but I can tuck in a shirt without sucking in my gut. However, as I move forward in my education and career I can see that I'd definitely reap benefits from losing the extra 10lbs or so. It would allow me to move to a leaner cut of suit and slim my facial profile (I have a slightly wider head then normal). Apparently this is not acceptable for some people who take it upon themselves to let me know that I am helping to perpetuate a stereotype, and that I should be ashamed of the harm I am supposedly causing.

Like Bruce said, fuck those people who are overly concerned about physical stereotypes. You need to look out for yourself, so you can feel the best that you can while you're pursuing your career. Just remember to keep it rill.*

*Don't put everything on the looks and skills.

[TheMercenary]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

Well if they live long enough to pay into Social Security, but not long enough to collect, then it's a good thing, right?

Actually no, because they amount the extract from Medicare/Medcaid in no way compensates for what they contributed.

[piercehawkeye45]

Its cliché but I bet a lot of the negative views on being overweight is caused with problems within theirself. I have found that the people that are the most critical of others are either obsessed with their body or very insecure about them. If you are content and relaxed with yourself then you are usually very less critical of others.

It also comes from trying to purposely fit in or break stereotypes. If you try to fit in with a stereotype then you are making a statement that you care too much about your given stereotype you want in on and if you are purposely (stress purposely again) trying to break a stereotype you are making a statement that you care too much about the stereotype given to you. Neither is good in my opinion.

When you start caring about how you look, then you will naturally start to care about how others look.

[Aliantha]

So 9th, because you care how you look, then you naturally care how others look?

[TheMercenary]

Originally Posted by piercehawkeye45

Its cliché but I bet a lot of the negative views on being overweight is caused with problems within theirself. I have found that the people that are the most critical of others are either obsessed with their body or very insecure about them. If you are content and relaxed with yourself then you are usually very less critical of others.

It also comes from trying to purposely fit in or break stereotypes. If you try to fit in with a stereotype then you are making a statement that you care too much about your given stereotype you want in on and if you are purposely (stress purposely again) trying to break a stereotype you are making a statement that you care too much about the stereotype given to you. Neither is good in my opinion.

When you start caring about how you look, then you will naturally start to care about how others look.

I don't know if I completely agree. I have many overweight and morbidly obese people who are perfectly content, on the outside. Inside? well no really knows if they are truely happy. Some people just have the ability to extrude a happiness about them that you know is the real deal, other merely put on a good front.

[9th Engineer]

I know quite a few people who do analyze other people's weight as an extension of their own obsession with themselves. But it's almost always the case that these types of people don't have much to focus on other then their's and other people's physical appearance. They obsess on their attractive physique to divert attention from their flaws, and they bully others about it to keep others looking at themselves and at them. If I don't feel the urge to make people pay undue attention to me, then I don't think I'm pressuring others to pay undue attention to themselves.
I won't deny that I pay attention to how people look, but I don't think it's in the way Ali is insinuating. I've been heavy myself, and I don't make snap judgments about others in terms of weight.

Anyway....

What do you think about her comments about boycotting stores that don't carry styles above sizes 12 or 13?

[Aliantha]

I'm not insinuating anything. I'm just asking a simple question.

[9th Engineer]

If it's a simple question, then yes Ali I do care how people around me present themselves. I expect people to look the part in whatever situation their in, but being heavy doesn't stop anyone doing that.

[Aliantha]

but why do you care? Why does it matter?