The Itchy Asshole Ledger

LJ · 11-29-2007, 04:38 PM

Quote:

Dane Cook - Itchy Asshole Lyrics

The other day, I don't know if you've ever gotten this, it was about 2:30
in the afternoon. I got the itchy-est asshole I've ever gotten on record.
And I keep a record of my itchy assholes. May 14, 1985, I had a very itchy
asshole. This one ousted it, GET OUTA HERE!...old itchy asshole. Oh it's the
worst isn't it? Agh you just feel..usually your at work or some place that you
can't focus on it. You gotta do some other activities, right. The entire day
you try to bounce around. Try to shake it out.

I was reminded of this bit today......

classicman · 11-29-2007, 04:39 PM

Sunday at the Supermarket.... nuff said!

LJ · 11-29-2007, 04:40 PM

if you nearly have an orgasm whilst scratching an itchy asshole......does that make you gay? just askin.....no reason....

...nevermind....

Shawnee123 · 11-29-2007, 04:42 PM

You men get the itchies there for the same reason you have skid marks in your drawers, don't you know?

Cicero · 11-29-2007, 04:46 PM

yes you are gay.

Sundae · 11-29-2007, 04:48 PM

You have worms

LJ · 11-29-2007, 04:49 PM

thanks for your support......you guys are SOOOOO sensitive.

Aliantha · 11-29-2007, 04:51 PM

If you have an orgasm while scratching your arse it means your prostate is working.

It's something you should be happy about Jimbo. Scratch away.

Aliantha · 11-29-2007, 04:52 PM

Although, if it's itchy that far up, you might have worms. I'd get that checked if I were you...

LJ · 11-29-2007, 05:00 PM

no no....i was asking for a friend.....and my friend was telling me that it just felt so good to scratch it....because the itch was so intense.....there was no....erm.....penetration, as it were.....or so he tells me. *cough*

Shawnee123 · 11-29-2007, 05:01 PM

OK, do I need to spell it out? Toilet paper is our friend. Sheesh

Cloud · 11-29-2007, 05:05 PM

Quote:

if you nearly have an orgasm whilst scratching an itchy asshole......does that make you gay? just askin.....no reason....

No, but it means you're missing the boat. Lots of wonderful nerve endings there just crying to be stimulated.

Witch Hazel pads help. Wipies help. Soap and water help the most.

Sundae · 11-29-2007, 05:07 PM

I now exercise 5-6 days a week, so I've had plenty of time to think about this. Sweat drips down my back and rolls down into my buttcrack. It tickles and then it stings.

I don't make a thread about it!

Sheesh.

Aliantha · 11-29-2007, 05:16 PM

hmmm...if it's stinging (can you believe I just typed 'stinking' lol) you might need to see if you've got haemaroids. I don't think sweat should sting should it?

LJ · 11-29-2007, 05:21 PM

i'm not looking. srsly

11-29-2007, 04:40 PM	#3
LJ i am myself Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: via blackberry, maybe Posts: 750	if you nearly have an orgasm whilst scratching an itchy asshole......does that make you gay? just askin.....no reason.... ...nevermind.... __________________ Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show ... -C.Dickens

11-29-2007, 04:46 PM	#5
Cicero Looking forward to open mic night. Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: New Mexico Posts: 5,148	yes you are gay. __________________ Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung

11-29-2007, 04:48 PM	#6
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	You have worms __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

11-29-2007, 04:49 PM	#7
LJ i am myself Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: via blackberry, maybe Posts: 750	thanks for your support......you guys are SOOOOO sensitive. __________________ Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show ... -C.Dickens

11-29-2007, 04:51 PM	#8
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	If you have an orgasm while scratching your arse it means your prostate is working. It's something you should be happy about Jimbo. Scratch away. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-29-2007, 04:39 PM	#2
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Sunday at the Supermarket.... nuff said!

11-29-2007, 04:42 PM	#4
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	You men get the itchies there for the same reason you have skid marks in your drawers, don't you know?

11-29-2007, 04:52 PM	#9
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Although, if it's itchy that far up, you might have worms. I'd get that checked if I were you... __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-29-2007, 05:00 PM	#10
LJ i am myself Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: via blackberry, maybe Posts: 750	no no....i was asking for a friend.....and my friend was telling me that it just felt so good to scratch it....because the itch was so intense.....there was no....erm.....penetration, as it were.....or so he tells me. cough __________________ Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show ... -C.Dickens

11-29-2007, 05:01 PM	#11
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	OK, do I need to spell it out? Toilet paper is our friend. Sheesh

11-29-2007, 05:07 PM	#13
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	I now exercise 5-6 days a week, so I've had plenty of time to think about this. Sweat drips down my back and rolls down into my buttcrack. It tickles and then it stings. I don't make a thread about it! Sheesh. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

11-29-2007, 05:16 PM	#14
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	hmmm...if it's stinging (can you believe I just typed 'stinking' lol) you might need to see if you've got haemaroids. I don't think sweat should sting should it? __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-29-2007, 05:21 PM	#15
LJ i am myself Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: via blackberry, maybe Posts: 750	i'm not looking. srsly __________________ Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show ... -C.Dickens

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