My friend with breast cancer - Page 10

Sundae · 09-12-2012, 04:23 PM

Madge is alive and well and coming to a Girls' Night In at the beginning of October. I won't get drunk and sing at this one (as I did at the one Janice hosted) as it's a school night. I will however cook and serve.

What you're going through is no fun, Ortho. But it's not the death sentence it once was.

orthodoc · 09-12-2012, 05:22 PM

No, survival is much better these days. Only 10% of women with little Stage 1 tumors die within five years. But a recurrence, or positive nodes, will take you off that little chart and put you on a different, darker one. However - it's definitely more of a chronic disease now if caught early. I'm going to try to walk in Tril's shoes and be hale and happy 5 years out.

monster · 09-12-2012, 09:20 PM

I wouldn't do that if I were you -her feet are minging :p

No my friend is talking about reconstruction surgery. I don't think she'll do it, but those newly single chicks are always surprising me. My 70s friend (mentioned elsewhere on here) suddenly split from her husband this year, met a guy took up biking, lost 20 pounds and started wearing expensive designer accessories.

DanaC · 09-13-2012, 04:34 PM

Is it really five years Bri?

I was about to say it doesn't feel that long since you started dealing with all that, but actually, thinking about it, yes it does. Time's weird :p

monster · 09-21-2012, 09:09 PM

FUCKING FUCKING HELL.

I've been simmering on this for a few hours since I learned of it, don't know what to do, so decided to write about it here.

No, not this friend, but another one. We met at our kids' preschool and bonded instantly -she had older kids and had been president, meanwhile I had kids and became president, then she had a "surprise" and came back and took over president so i could sort out the treasury... we weren't really that much together at the school but something "clicked" We went to her annual fall bonfire/pumpkin carving/hayride/whatever for years. I guess now I type it, one of our "bonding things" was my kids went to the Open school and her best friend was the Librarian there and she was all "oh you'll love Kit" and I was "Oh yes i do".......

Then dry summers put a damper on that (open fire restrictions) and our kids moved on and went their separate ways (completely different sides of the city). But occasianally we bumped in to each other and had a chat/catch-up -we both have hockey player and swimmers/divers.

Then Kit (who I just added to the first para) becomes principal. First thing she does is hire our mutual friend as lunchtime supervisor boss lady. Awesome. (12 months ago) We're both always busy when we meet but we catch up slowly. Then one day she comes in and says "Does Hebe go to Skyline and take Latin?" and I say yes -her son 3 grades above Hebe and they only ever vaguely met at the fall bonfires ?8 years ago recognised her name and heterochromia (eyes different colors like Bowie)

So funny, cool beans -she's happy because her son has difficulty remembering and recognising people but remembers Hebe from way back when,a few parties, and I'm happy because she's great with Thor, who is a little challenging, but she loves him -she's known him since he was a little squit and recalls fondly the motion-activated animatronic trick-or-treater she used to have on her porch at her fall parties -Thor was obsessesd with it and would stand in front of it and keep it going for hours.

I learned today she has breast cancer (advancd?) and isn't in school. We never updated non-face-to-face contact info because we see each other so often and she was always crap online anyway. I want to contact her, but can't decide how to, and the person who let slip about her breast cancer was a school admin and immediately realised she probably shouldn't have.

...monster leaves post unposted, wanders off for a bit and comes back.......

Oh wait, thank you cellar, i realised after writing this all out what to do. I'mm'a email Kit and say look, i know, maybe i shouldn't but please tell her i love her am thinking of here nad are here for her.

thanks. no need to respond.

zippyt · 09-21-2012, 10:46 PM

FFFUUUUUUCCKK Cancer !!!!!

orthodoc · 09-21-2012, 11:03 PM

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo cancer.

Sorry, monster.

footfootfoot · 09-21-2012, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orthodoc

No, survival is much better these days. Only 10% of women with little Stage 1 tumors die within five years. But a recurrence, or positive nodes, will take you off that little chart and put you on a different, darker one. However - it's definitely more of a chronic disease now if caught early. I'm going to try to walk in Tril's shoes and be hale and happy 5 years out.

A somewhat crazy ex-gf contacted me out of the blue and has been emailing me too much lately but whatever. When I met her 16 years ago she was 5 years in the clear of Non Hodgkins Lymphoma. She contacted me, I guess because it was her 20th clear year.

Just thought I'd share that bit of light. not scary crazy, just annoying crazy and now with the whole namaste thing...

limey · 09-22-2012, 03:08 AM

F. U. C. K. cancer

monster · 09-22-2012, 11:29 AM

Coincidentally, my original friend in this thread pass this woman's house every day on our walks. They don't know each other, though.

Kit emailed back and said she's seeing her this weekend and will pass on my love. I'll catch up with Kit next week.

Griff · 09-22-2012, 12:41 PM

Sorry monster.

monster · 09-22-2012, 01:14 PM

I just posted her a <3 on facebook. She doesn't post, so I had forgotten she was on there but I remembered a few minutes ago because I'm sat here being maudlin and thinking about her and reading Mike Baker's Cancer Blog. I saw a few messages of support from her friends on her wall but now I fear the worst. On Sep 12, there are a few messages that suggest that was her surgery date. Also that very few people knew.

and she said

Quote:

I am on the path to recovery.Not sure yet what will come next. Waiting on pathology report. I appreciate all prayers! Send my regards to all.

So now I'm thinking the path results must've been this week and they're not good

I so hope I'm wrong and my powers of deduction suck.

monster · 10-04-2012, 06:12 PM

I saw her today! She came into school. Mastectomy on the 10th but signs are good it hasn't metastasized

Clodfobble · 10-04-2012, 06:26 PM

That's good news!

monster · 10-04-2012, 08:22 PM

Right. She seemed fairly upbeat. Apparently she already had a lumpectomy and thought she was done, but post-op lab results showed it was still strongly present and they were fearing cancer everywhere.

So it brings it all back because it's October -same at my first friend- and it's breast cancer awareness month. I remember my friend getting all sorts of flowers and things wrapped with pink ribbons "saying "Breast Cancer Awareness" Now I know I'm over-sensitive, but if someone is undergoing a mastectomy, I think they're pretty goddamn aware of it by that point. I mentioned it to a friend tonight and she said funny our mutual friend (who had a mastectomy before i knew her -I met her around about the end of her chemo I think) also had her surgery in October.

It must be coincidence, but......

you'd think if there was going to be a spike, it'd be a few months after breast cancer awareness month, no?

09-12-2012, 04:23 PM	#136
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Madge is alive and well and coming to a Girls' Night In at the beginning of October. I won't get drunk and sing at this one (as I did at the one Janice hosted) as it's a school night. I will however cook and serve. What you're going through is no fun, Ortho. But it's not the death sentence it once was. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

09-12-2012, 05:22 PM	#137
orthodoc Not Suspicious, Merely Canadian Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 3,774	No, survival is much better these days. Only 10% of women with little Stage 1 tumors die within five years. But a recurrence, or positive nodes, will take you off that little chart and put you on a different, darker one. However - it's definitely more of a chronic disease now if caught early. I'm going to try to walk in Tril's shoes and be hale and happy 5 years out. __________________ The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. - Ghandi

09-12-2012, 09:20 PM	#138
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I wouldn't do that if I were you -her feet are minging :p No my friend is talking about reconstruction surgery. I don't think she'll do it, but those newly single chicks are always surprising me. My 70s friend (mentioned elsewhere on here) suddenly split from her husband this year, met a guy took up biking, lost 20 pounds and started wearing expensive designer accessories. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-21-2012, 09:09 PM	#140
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	FUCKING FUCKING HELL. I've been simmering on this for a few hours since I learned of it, don't know what to do, so decided to write about it here. No, not this friend, but another one. We met at our kids' preschool and bonded instantly -she had older kids and had been president, meanwhile I had kids and became president, then she had a "surprise" and came back and took over president so i could sort out the treasury... we weren't really that much together at the school but something "clicked" We went to her annual fall bonfire/pumpkin carving/hayride/whatever for years. I guess now I type it, one of our "bonding things" was my kids went to the Open school and her best friend was the Librarian there and she was all "oh you'll love Kit" and I was "Oh yes i do"....... Then dry summers put a damper on that (open fire restrictions) and our kids moved on and went their separate ways (completely different sides of the city). But occasianally we bumped in to each other and had a chat/catch-up -we both have hockey player and swimmers/divers. Then Kit (who I just added to the first para) becomes principal. First thing she does is hire our mutual friend as lunchtime supervisor boss lady. Awesome. (12 months ago) We're both always busy when we meet but we catch up slowly. Then one day she comes in and says "Does Hebe go to Skyline and take Latin?" and I say yes -her son 3 grades above Hebe and they only ever vaguely met at the fall bonfires ?8 years ago recognised her name and heterochromia (eyes different colors like Bowie) So funny, cool beans -she's happy because her son has difficulty remembering and recognising people but remembers Hebe from way back when,a few parties, and I'm happy because she's great with Thor, who is a little challenging, but she loves him -she's known him since he was a little squit and recalls fondly the motion-activated animatronic trick-or-treater she used to have on her porch at her fall parties -Thor was obsessesd with it and would stand in front of it and keep it going for hours. I learned today she has breast cancer (advancd?) and isn't in school. We never updated non-face-to-face contact info because we see each other so often and she was always crap online anyway. I want to contact her, but can't decide how to, and the person who let slip about her breast cancer was a school admin and immediately realised she probably shouldn't have. ...monster leaves post unposted, wanders off for a bit and comes back....... Oh wait, thank you cellar, i realised after writing this all out what to do. I'mm'a email Kit and say look, i know, maybe i shouldn't but please tell her i love her am thinking of here nad are here for her. thanks. no need to respond. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-21-2012, 10:46 PM	#141
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	FFFUUUUUUCCKK Cancer !!!!! __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

09-21-2012, 11:03 PM	#142
orthodoc Not Suspicious, Merely Canadian Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 3,774	Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo cancer. Sorry, monster. __________________ The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. - Ghandi

09-22-2012, 03:08 AM	#144
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	F. U. C. K. cancer __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

09-22-2012, 11:29 AM	#145
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Coincidentally, my original friend in this thread pass this woman's house every day on our walks. They don't know each other, though. Kit emailed back and said she's seeing her this weekend and will pass on my love. I'll catch up with Kit next week. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-22-2012, 12:41 PM	#146
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Sorry monster. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

10-04-2012, 06:12 PM	#148
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I saw her today! She came into school. Mastectomy on the 10th but signs are good it hasn't metastasized __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

10-04-2012, 06:26 PM	#149
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	That's good news! __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

10-04-2012, 08:22 PM	#150
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Right. She seemed fairly upbeat. Apparently she already had a lumpectomy and thought she was done, but post-op lab results showed it was still strongly present and they were fearing cancer everywhere. So it brings it all back because it's October -same at my first friend- and it's breast cancer awareness month. I remember my friend getting all sorts of flowers and things wrapped with pink ribbons "saying "Breast Cancer Awareness" Now I know I'm over-sensitive, but if someone is undergoing a mastectomy, I think they're pretty goddamn aware of it by that point. I mentioned it to a friend tonight and she said funny our mutual friend (who had a mastectomy before i knew her -I met her around about the end of her chemo I think) also had her surgery in October. It must be coincidence, but...... you'd think if there was going to be a spike, it'd be a few months after breast cancer awareness month, no? __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)