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   Undertoad  Tuesday Jun 26 08:24 AM

June 26, 2007: Corn field motoring



Reddit points to this item from the Netherlands, where apparently a police chopper captured this great shot.
Which is scaled down a little from the original even more massive shot...

It turns out this is the result if an extremely confused and coked-up guy drives into a cornfield. Picture it:
one moment the guy is looking at road, the next moment he's looking at... something! he can't figure out!
Even if he drives around in circles! it's still! all! around! The only way to defeat it is to mush it all down!
That's right, can't take any chances! Mush it all down! All down!

Anyway, I particularly like the Dutch-to-English translation of a news article that someone posted.
Somehow these translations almost speak in the accent of the language barrier they are trying to cross.
I mean, when I read the following, I read it with a Dutch accent, and it fits *perfectly*.

Quote:
Around 18.25 the police force report got that on the Kornpad in Dussen grey Mercedes the corn field
had ridden into area car. On the spot the agents found a completely confused man, who drove rondjes
with its car constantly by the corn field. It succeeded in absolutely no manner to make contact with
the man. When of the agents a its gatekeeper tried pull open, the man gave gas. The agent fell on
the ground and could, by super-fast is legs pull away, prevents that he was run over. To prevent that
the motorist would reach public gone, the access ways were turned off to the field with police force
vehicles. This will have brought with, as it happens, an unacceptable security risk with itself.



Shawnee123  Tuesday Jun 26 08:30 AM

Just, wow!

Quote:
the man gave gas. The agent fell on the ground
Shouldn't this be in Fargon's fart thread?


spudcon  Tuesday Jun 26 09:16 AM

Cornfield art

I think I see a miraculous image of Elvis in that cornfield. At least now we know where crop circles come from.:p



odie number seven  Tuesday Jun 26 09:24 AM

Maybe he saw children in the cornfield???



Flint  Tuesday Jun 26 09:24 AM

He was cornfused.



Shawnee123  Tuesday Jun 26 09:44 AM

We call it "maize."



xoxoxoBruce  Tuesday Jun 26 10:02 AM

Looks like he took a couple of turns through the adjoining dark and light green patches, also.



fargon  Tuesday Jun 26 10:02 AM

The giving of gas is a noble thing, give that man a Del Taco macho combo burrito, and send him home.



barefoot serpent  Tuesday Jun 26 12:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by fargon View Post
The giving of gas is a noble thing
but only if it's Helium, Argon, Neon, Krypton or Xenon... fargon???


Cloud  Tuesday Jun 26 12:50 PM

I'm in awe of everyone's comments and have nothing even remotely as clever to add.



artemis05  Tuesday Jun 26 12:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawnee123 View Post
We call it "maize."
its a maize maze!!
although corn and maize are two different things, closely related though.

also, almost all crop circles are done in wheat fields, not corn fields.


Shawnee123  Tuesday Jun 26 12:59 PM

Well, just wait until the County Cornmissioner gets there! That guy must have been stalk-raving mad.



SteveDallas  Tuesday Jun 26 01:15 PM

There's a kernel of truth in what you say, Shawnee.



Spexxvet  Tuesday Jun 26 01:26 PM

All your cornfields are belong to us



Flint  Tuesday Jun 26 01:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spexxvet View Post
All your cornfields are belong to us
I was picturing the guy driving around the field yelling that, when it occurred to me:
...this is what Christopher Walken did, somewhere near the end of At Close Range.


Coign  Tuesday Jun 26 01:36 PM

I am in ur fields

killing ur corns.



Spexxvet  Tuesday Jun 26 01:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coign View Post
I am in ur fields

killing ur corns.
drivin on ur ears


Flint  Tuesday Jun 26 01:43 PM

Now I'm imagining this guy as Ronnie Dobbs.

"YOU'RE under arrest" ... "Y'all are brutalizin' me!" ... "I didn't even get my suck-off!"



Undertoad  Tuesday Jun 26 01:43 PM




Shawnee123  Tuesday Jun 26 01:47 PM

That was a laugh out louder!



barefoot serpent  Tuesday Jun 26 01:55 PM

not to put a damper on all the corny puns but I think
graangebied is more correctly translated as simply: grain field.

And that does look more like wheat than corn, anyway... I've seen a bit here in Kansas. And, I'm guessing that in the next field is hops. The beer drinkers would have his guts-for-garters if he had mowed that down!



Shawnee123  Tuesday Jun 26 02:09 PM

Quote:
not to put a damper on all the corny puns but I think
graangebied is more correctly translated as simply: grain field.

And that does look more like wheat than corn, anyway... I've seen a bit here in Kansas. And, I'm guessing that in the next field is hops. The beer drinkers would have his guts-for-garters if he had mowed that down!
But, but...
Quote:
on the Kornpad in Dussen grey Mercedes the corn field
had ridden into area car. On the spot the agents found a completely confused man, who drove rondjes
with its car constantly by the corn field.
:p


Cloud  Tuesday Jun 26 02:17 PM

there only looks to be one entrance point. Did one car do all that?

Edit: okay, looking closely I can see another possible entrypoint on the far right. I was wondering why he went around in circles so much if they weren't chasing him.



lumberjim  Tuesday Jun 26 03:18 PM

didn't consider that maybe the chasing car followed him in...using the same path?



Spexxvet  Tuesday Jun 26 03:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by barefoot serpent View Post
not to put a damper on all the corny puns but I think
graangebied is more correctly translated as simply: grain field.

And that does look more like wheat than corn, anyway... I've seen a bit here in Kansas. And, I'm guessing that in the next field is hops. The beer drinkers would have his guts-for-garters if he had mowed that down!
im in ur grainfield eatin yours hops




Flint  Tuesday Jun 26 03:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cloud View Post
...I was wondering why he went around in circles so much if they weren't chasing him.
Well, at first he had a simple job to do. When the coppers showed, things got messy.


wolf  Tuesday Jun 26 03:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by barefoot serpent View Post
And that does look more like wheat than corn, anyway... I've seen a bit here in Kansas. And, I'm guessing that in the next field is hops. The beer drinkers would have his guts-for-garters if he had mowed that down!
I thought that in Europe all field grains are considered corn.

Our corn is specified as Indian Corn.

That does look a lot more like a wheat field to my eyes.

I believe that the soil and weather requirements for corn are sufficiently restrictive that you can't actually grow it well anywhere but in the United States.


Wombat  Tuesday Jun 26 06:37 PM

How did he end up crashed in the hedge at the bottom of the field to the left of the cornfield? There aren't even any tracks leading there.



monster  Tuesday Jun 26 09:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wolf View Post
I thought that in Europe all field grains are considered corn.

Our corn is specified as Indian Corn.
I understood that, in Olde English, corn is commonly used to denote the most prevalent grain crop of the region. "Indian" corn is sweetcorn to Brits. (We generally only get the yellow variety). Cornfields (with or without crop circles) in the UK are usually wheat.

and yes, that's amazing.

Can't find any pics of the maze we went to last year, but it wasn't dissimilar to that mess. Here's a video of the local news item about it with a brief aerial shot of the whole thing...

http://www.talladayfarms.com/index.cfm?farm=media


Sheldonrs  Tuesday Jun 26 10:30 PM

When asked for a comment by the local newspaper, the driver was heard to say "shucks".



xoxoxoBruce  Tuesday Jun 26 11:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wombat View Post
How did he end up crashed in the hedge at the bottom of the field to the left of the cornfield? There aren't even any tracks leading there.
Slipped out the cornhole?


Flint  Tuesday Jun 26 11:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce View Post
... cornhole ...
Bingo! . . . Somebody had to say it...


Gravdigr  Tuesday Jun 26 11:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cloud View Post
I'm in awe of everyone's comments and have nothing even remotely as clever to add.
Me neither, too.


wolf  Tuesday Jun 26 11:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post

Can't find any pics of the maze we went to last year, but it wasn't dissimilar to that mess. Here's a video of the local news item about it with a brief aerial shot of the whole thing...
One of our local dairies (yes, the one that bought that little girl a new kidney) dedicates one of their feedcorn fields to a Maize-maze every year. Last time I went there was a great innovation ... night access. You had to go through the maze with flashlights. Much spookier, but about the same level of challenge doing it in daylight gives. One thing that makes you head through the whole maze is a contest element. They have stations throughout the maze where you have to answer some corn-related trivia questions.

Once the season's over, they harvest the field and feed it to the moo-moos.


SPUCK  Wednesday Jun 27 05:44 AM

The guy was confused??? Hell yes! He was dizzy as hell!!

Which car is the cornmobile?? The blue one or the one on its side?



Griff  Wednesday Jun 27 06:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheldonrs View Post
When asked for a comment by the local newspaper, the driver was heard to say "shucks".
ouch


Shawnee123  Wednesday Jun 27 08:45 AM

it was this guy

.



xoxoxoBruce  Wednesday Jun 27 10:14 AM

After the mess was cleaned up, they discovered a method to his madness.



Spexxvet  Wednesday Jun 27 10:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sheldonrs View Post
When asked for a comment by the local newspaper, the driver was heard to say "shucks".
- in a husky voice.


Shawnee123  Wednesday Jun 27 11:13 AM

lol!

homina homina hominy



bigw00dy  Wednesday Jun 27 03:17 PM

You are all blind to this massive conspiracy............it is obviously crop circles formed by an E.T.

non believers



Fa-  Thursday Jun 28 10:27 AM

its like a giant etcha-sketch!



JuancoRocks  Friday Jun 29 12:17 AM

The Cornfield Conspiracy

Looks like he got excellent gas mileage.
Must have been the ethanol.



xoxoxoBruce  Friday Jun 29 12:22 AM

Things go further with Coke.



RellikLaerec  Friday Jun 29 02:05 AM

I like how the local paper here put the caption for it: Signs of unintelligent life.



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