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   xoxoxoBruce  Tuesday Feb 16 11:54 PM

Feb 17, 2010; Bacon Torch

Ever get heartburn from bacon? Lucky it wasn't from this bacon.

Quote:
I recently committed myself to the goal, before the weekend was out, of creating a device entirely from bacon and using it to cut a steel pan in half. My initial attempts were failures, but I knew success was within reach when I was able to ignite and melt the pan using seven beef sticks and a cucumber.


Quote:
I used prosciutto (Italian for "expensive bacon") because it is a superior engineering grade of meat. I wrapped slices of it into thin tubes and baked them overnight in a warm oven to drive off all the water. Then I bundled seven of those together, wrapped them in additional slices, and baked the bundle again until it was hard and dry.
To make an airtight, less-flammable outer casing, I wrapped this fuel core with uncooked prosciutto before attaching one end of it to an oxygen hose.
OK, but what about the cucumber?

Quote:
It turns out there are much easier ways to do this. For example, while researching how to build a vegetarian lance, I hit on the perfect pipe material -- hollowed-out cucumbers. The pressure-containment capacity of a standard cucumber is remarkable, and the smooth skin makes it easy to create an airtight seal with the pipe delivering oxygen to the device. A cucumber packed with beef sticks will burn for almost two minutes, and a completely vegetarian version stuffed with breadsticks, though not quite as long-lasting, still produces a very impressive flame.
Vegetarian thermal lance? Oh sure, how about a kosher A-bomb too.


link


monster  Wednesday Feb 17 12:10 AM

I have better uses for bacon.

...and cucmbers....



toranokaze  Wednesday Feb 17 01:00 AM

wast of bacon



SPUCK  Wednesday Feb 17 06:12 AM

Could be very useful if you were trapped in a prison cell with a bunch of meat.

And cucumbers.


And a hose.

And a regulator.


And a cylinder of oxygen...



Trilby  Wednesday Feb 17 06:19 AM

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....phallic bacon....



Slight  Wednesday Feb 17 08:06 AM

so 2009



xoxoxoBruce  Wednesday Feb 17 10:16 AM

My link's earlier than your link.



Gravdigr  Wednesday Feb 17 10:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brianna View Post
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....phallic bacon....
A flame-throwing bacon cock, no less.


dlturman  Wednesday Feb 17 10:42 AM

WOW. 1200degrees of [kelvin] bacon



xoxoxoBruce  Wednesday Feb 17 10:46 AM

Kelvin Bacon.



lupin..the..3rd  Wednesday Feb 17 07:28 PM

A good pickup line: Hey babe, I can cut through steel with my meat!



monster  Thursday Feb 18 12:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce View Post
Kelvin Bacon.
degrees kelvin....


ZenGum  Thursday Feb 18 04:24 AM

Quote:
I recently committed myself to the goal, before the weekend was out, of creating a device entirely from bacon and using it to cut a steel pan in half.
Clearly, beer was involved.


Sheldonrs  Thursday Feb 18 08:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
I have better uses for bacon.

...and cucmbers....
Taking "pork" to the next level, are we?


Gravdigr  Thursday Feb 18 01:52 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
Clearly, beer was involved.
Clearly, medication was not.


Cloud  Thursday Feb 18 02:16 PM

bacon blunts! I have better use for blunts . . .



TheMercenary  Thursday Feb 18 10:30 PM

Weird. So he basically welded with some bacon.



xoxoxoBruce  Friday Feb 19 01:10 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by monster View Post
degrees kelvin....
No, 1200 degrees of Kelvin Bacon

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheMercenary View Post
Weird. So he basically welded with some bacon.
Technically he just cut it, he didn't weld it.


xoxoxoBruce  Monday Mar 8 06:36 AM

From torch to rocket

If you're at work turn the sound down... hell, turn it down anyway.

[/color]



SPUCK  Tuesday Mar 9 04:21 AM

Nice smell of bacon as you watch the house burn down.



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