9/8/2003: Ear horns

This pair of Victorian-era ear horns is a hoot! They aren't metal, they're made out of paper mache.

I thought such things were only a joke, but it seems they really did exist. Apparently they were originally developed for sailors to communicate over miles over open sea, and then of course used by the hard-of-hearing.

A fine example of military technology working its way down into everyday life. A big round of thanks to all you government contractors out there!

So which end do you light?

<geek type="science">
If you put your hands behind your head, the parts of your arms sticking out will form large ears. It doesn't make a big difference, but if you fire up the stereo, you'll hear it. Arm angles might need tweaking for best effect.
</geek>

You know - I sat here and tried to think of something funny to say about this.


I can't - its just a little to odd for me.

I don't know, I can't help but hear Pee Wee Herman going, "What?!? What?!?"

I think I need my medication now.

Ah, in the days of old....

Somehow, I imagine an aged Kate Winslet standing on the bow a vast ship, sailing mightly through the ocean, getting the worst ear infections ever....

As you probably recall, I, too, am a government contractor. So thanks, suckers, for my big fat paycheck!

Yeah...too bad we can't vote on government contractors.

Yeah, too bad. I can't wait for that day, because that will be the day the whole country goes down the fuckin' tube. The government needs contractors, and the people need the government to need contractors. Trust me, it's much better this way.

Most contractors are fine, I'm sure...you, on the other hand...so, what exactly are we getting for our dollars with you?

I suppose you think I'm allowed to tell you. Ha.

(Basically, the stuff we're working on makes our military less accident prone, so it's supposed to save civilians and military lives in the long run. You're welcome.)

Yes but endangered, for sure.

Sure, where did you think Depends Undergarmets came from, the space program?

So THAT'S how Dave is able to sit at the computer for 8 hours straight...

You work at SAIC, Bitman? Which area?

http://www.cecer.army.mil/td/tips/index.cfm

I actually meant, where location wise?

Yes, I know. I was being indirect; that web site tells you exactly where I work.

Ok fine: Champaign, IL.

What? You snuck out of Baltimore like the Colts.

You're thinking of Bitmap, I believe.

Doh...Nevermind.