The Cellar - New Olympic proposals

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- - New Olympic proposals (http://cellar.org/showthread.php?t=27707)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet (Post 821495)

Certainly would end all the "who has the hottest bod" discussion.;)

In fact it'd attract a whole new audience demographic! Ratings would soar!

Seriously, I'd like to see sports done by nationality ... Scots in tiny kilts worn traditionally ;), heaving cabers around; Russians and Finns in the altogether running in and out of saunas beating each other with birch sprigs and leaving the slowest competitor to the wolves ... Greeks running marathons and collapsing, to be revived by muses ... hmm, what else? I know - Frenchmen/women and Spaniards in wine-drinking and flamenco competitions - all naked, of course ...

Speaking as a musician I'm not sure why there aren't "Battles of the Bands".

Some European women could compete in armpit hair braiding.:bolt:

Naked? In Britain? In July? Are you mad?

Joggling.

Quote:

Matthew Feldman will try to break a record this Friday in joggling — juggling while jogging. He's trying to run one mile while continuously juggling five objects. He broke the Guinness World Record in practice, and if he doesn't drop the ball Friday, he can make it official.

Hmm, perhaps you're right, Dana. Wouldn't be much to see after all ... :p:

Why not add high-heels runs to the racing events?

Or Toddler Slalom, where you chase a sugar-fed toddler through a house and have to dodge Legos, action figures/dolls, pets, roller skates and such, with points awarded for agility, stamina and creative use of furniture. Points deducted for knocking things over, stepping on anything but floor or sofa cushion or falling down the stairs.

Full Contact Jazzercise

Synchronized Ball Gargling

Speed Circumcision

The Long Hump

The problem with Olympic proposals is if she says, "No." you are completely dissed in front of the whole world. Much worse than that guy at the basketball game.

BEACH VOLLEYBALL

Who are they trying to kid ?
Beach volleyball is the current equivalent of TV wrestling in the 50's.

Huffington Post
7/29/12

Olympic Beach Volleyball: Bikinis Still Uniform Choice Despite London Weather (PHOTOS)

Quote:

LONDON — The Benny Hill theme plays over the loudspeaker at Horse Guards Parade,
the crowd cheers and the raking crew scurries out to smooth over the footprints in the sand.
This is beach volleyball, British style.<snip>

A dance team in bathing suits jiggled for the sold-out crowd during timeouts,
while rock music nearly drowned out the pealing of Big Ben.
And, much to the relief of the British tabloids, the athletes wore their traditional bikinis
despite the chill in the air that left the sand at 67 degrees when the day started.<snip>

The public address announcer played the part of disco DJ, calling for cheers so loud
that the prime minister might hear at his residence next door.
When the wave circled the grandstand, he gave it at least as much attention as his athletic play-by-play,
following it from Downing Street to St. James's Park and back around to Horse Guards Road,
where a royal sentry still protects the sovereign's exclusive entrance to Buckingham Palace.

Quote:

"Have a safe journey home," he said, "or to the pub."

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lamplighter (Post 822056)

BEACH VOLLEYBALL

Who are they trying to kid ?
Beach volleyball is the current equivalent of TV wrestling in the 50's.

What? Are you saying they aren't serious athletes doing their very best to win, regardless of the dog and pony show going on around them?

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce (Post 822059)

What? Are you saying they aren't serious athletes doing their very best to win,
regardless of the dog and pony show going on around them?

Exactly... two players can not defend the entire court without a
gentleman's agreement about how the returns are to be played.

When one player is up for a block, the other player supposedly
is defending the entire rest of the court.... Yeah sure.
Even a high school kid could dink and spike to un-defended areas all day long,
and these "athletes in bikinis" could not defend against it.

If this "sport" had not started in the US, it would have never made it to the Olympics.
I think the dog and pony show going on around them is
what it's really all about... women in bikinis playing in the sand !

:p:

It's official...

Attachment 39881

But they are not allowed to play in wet T-shirts. :(

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lamplighter (Post 822061)

Even a high school kid could dink and spike to un-defended areas all day long,
and these "athletes in bikinis" could not defend against it.

Men play beach volleyball too.
Am hoping to see you win Gold in Brazil for your country. It's piss-easy after all.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lamplighter (Post 822061)

If this "sport" had not started in the US, it would have never made it to the Olympics.

Tcha.
I feel the same way about the worldwide spread of football, and rugby, and cricket, and tennis, and badminton, and golf....