New Olympic proposals

[Undertoad]

The other day I was thinking, they have different kinds of swim races even though the freestyle is the fastest, but in running they only have like the one kind of running. They should have 100 meter running backwards, 100 meter with no arms, etc.

Although they do have jumping over things. So they should have swimming over things too. Like here's where the pool gets shallow in the middle.

Also I would like a Decathlon where they do all the events at once.

Also they should take things from the Strongman competition, where they have to haul a big heavy chain or put big rocks on top of pillars, there should be more of that. They already have the hammer throw so tell me it would not be great if there was a thing where they had to tow a big heavy truck behind them while racing.

I have not been drinking tonight so these are legitimate ideas.

[Griff]

[ZenGum]

Well, the walking event is kind of a stylised form of running.

How about real-life stuff like running while carrying a briefcase and a laptop?

Or bring back some of the events from the first 50 years of the modern Olympics, like sculpture, poetry composition, town planning or poodle trimming?

[Lamplighter]

...or sleeping without snoring... last one to wake up wins

[Spexxvet]

Swimming in a business suit

Kayaking drunk

Driving. All kinds of driving competitions, except for speed.

How about having the ghetto olympics? High jump over a chain link fence. 100 M dash away from pit bulls or cops. Shooting contests with gangsta guns. Marathon through a busy city without the streets being closed to traffic or pedestrians. You know, things like that.

[ZenGum]

I may have said this before, but I'd like to change the Olympics so that you have to qualify in one sport, but then have to compete in a randomly chosen different sport.

Imagine the weightlifters trying gymnastics, the sprinters playing water polo, the swimmers doing shooting.

It'd be FUN.

[Clodfobble]

Running in neck-high water.

Running while smoking a cigarette, must be consumed down to the butt by the finish line.

Crabwalk race.

[Undertoad]

OK they do have steeplechase, where you have to jump over something and into a puddle. Somebody probably came up with that on one of these kinds of threads.

Running while smoking a cigarette, must be consumed down to the butt by the finish line.

I like this, and it should naturally be extended to relay. There could be two kinds of relay. One where each runner smokes down their butt and then uses it to light the next runner's butt. And another where they just exchange it, in usual relay fashion.

Walking, another good event, probably came from one of these threads.

The whole idea of corporate sponsorship, getting so controversial, I say we take it to the next level. Winston cigarette relay. Fiji Water swimming. Craftsman hammer throw. Frisbee discus. Biggus Discus!

Also, there are Summer and Winter Olympics but no Spring and Autumn Olympics. There's running with a light jacket on. Or hey - Arab Spring Olympics, where you run 800M with a Syrian sharpshooter trying to peg you from atop the torch tower.

[glatt]

Originally Posted by Undertoad

each runner smokes down their butt and then uses it to light the next runner's butt.

I love it! This is just like the Biathlon, where they ski like mad and then have to drop down to one knee and get their breathing and shaking under control so they can squeeze off a shot with some accuracy. Lighting one butt off another is going to take some focus. You can't be sprinting while doing it.

[Beest]

Monster was positing the other day that they should go old school, i.e. naked.

What with all the stuff about fancy suits being an advantage, for swimmer and runners, maybe that woudl cut out some of the controversey.

[Spexxvet]

Originally Posted by Beest

Monster was positing the other day that they should go old school, i.e. naked.

What with all the stuff about fancy suits being an advantage, for swimmer and runners, maybe that woudl cut out some of the controversey.

Certainly would end all the "who has the hottest bod" discussion.

[orthodoc]

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

Certainly would end all the "who has the hottest bod" discussion.

In fact it'd attract a whole new audience demographic! Ratings would soar!

Seriously, I'd like to see sports done by nationality ... Scots in tiny kilts worn traditionally , heaving cabers around; Russians and Finns in the altogether running in and out of saunas beating each other with birch sprigs and leaving the slowest competitor to the wolves ... Greeks running marathons and collapsing, to be revived by muses ... hmm, what else? I know - Frenchmen/women and Spaniards in wine-drinking and flamenco competitions - all naked, of course ...

[jimhelm]

There should be a Beer Olympics segment too.

[Griff]

Shopping cart switch. Who can switch shopping carts the most times, while coming as close as possible to filling their own grocery list without deviating from the projected route? I left the building with the third cart today!

[jimhelm]

Originally Posted by jimhelm

There should be a Beer Olympics segment too.

Track and Beer:

Beer Hurdles:
10 Lap Race. knock a hurdle over, you drink.


Beer High Jump.
bar starts at 5'. you can jump or drink a beer and advance to the next 4" increment. You must jump and clear the bar to win. If you knock the bar over, you can drink and try again. twice.

^^same rules for Beer Pole Vault


100 Meter Beer Dash:

Competitors start the race with a full Red Solo Cup™ full of Miller Lite™ beer. Sprint 100 yards, pour your beer into an empty cup at the finish line. repeat as many trips as it takes to fill the cup. Drink the full cup down to finish the race.

400 Meter Relay:

1st man starts with a beer, hands it to 2nd man who has his own beer. 2nd man carries both to the halfway point, pours his into an empty pitcher. 3rd man takes the pitcher and a beer, carries it to the anchor who pours the 3rd beer into the pitcher and carries it and his own full beer to the finish. He then pours his beer into the pitcher, which must be over the fill line.... then all 4 team members must help to drink the pitcher to end the race.


Kegstacking


moar