Physicians Are People Too
 

So miniFob is teething, and has a cold with really bad nasal congestion, and had ridiculously bad gas last night... their powers combined, he woke up crying every twenty minutes all night long.

No, I'm not exaggerating. Every twenty minutes. (Unless, of course, you count the time period from 4:00 AM to 5:30 AM, during which he was just awake.)

I already had a doctor's appointment scheduled for him this morning because the aforementioned cold-with-low-grade-fever has dragged on for 2 weeks now, so as part of the symptom rundown I got to mention to his pediatrician the Sleeping Pattern From Hell.

Her response? "Oh honey, when he gets like that, just give him a ton of Benadryl, knock the little bugger out."

:eek:

Not that it's necessarily bad advice, I do have a good sense of where the middle ground is between "sleep-deprivation psychosis" and "let the drugs do the parenting." I'm just used to hearing that kind of advice from friends and real-world parents, not people who have to pay for malpractice insurance.

I love real people as pediatricians. What alternative were you expecting? (Not meaning to be combatative here, althought I realise I sound a bit that way) minifob is your first? How old is he? around 1?

OK think about how often you wake up when you feel like shit with a stuffed up nose, heartburn, and then let's add in bad menstrual cramps to represent the teething. the multiply it by the number of times he sleeps in the day and the number of extra feeds he has in the day etc etc..... his life goes much faster, things happen more frequently.

Yes, it feels like utter shit when you have to get up and be with him, but it's not so abnormal for someone so little. 20 minutes is a long nap for someone that age. OK, you're talking middle of the night sleep, but when you feel so crappy, it's hard to do much more than nap. the drugs will help him reach a deeper level of sleep than "nap level".

I know I sound unfeeling, but I'm not. I'm trying to say his behaviour is not worringly abnormal and i think that's what the pediatrician was trying to convey. I know his sleep pattern is awful. But this too will pass.

I love our pediatrician. Found her quite by accident. But turns out she's a real person too. This year, our youngest sons started KG together and ended up on the same soccer team. I am so thankful that now she sees the evidence that all those injuries are self-inflicted!

I guess most of us have expectations of people like doctors etc and are a bit blown away when they drop that professional detatchment.

Maybe it would have been more PC of her to write a script for a higher strength cough medicine and tell you how important it is to stick to the right dose etc, but ultimately, it'd end up being the same as what she suggested.

Our family doc is fairly straight with us. I like it. I think more doctors should enjoy the freedom of being able to communicate on different levels with their patients.

Not sure the doc is "dropping the professional detatchment". Are they more likely to be sued for suggesting over the counter cough meds or prescribing over-the-top POMs? I think the doc is being very professional -cf clearly understands what was said, and that's at least 90% of the battle.....

Ahuh...and the last professional to call you honey was? The manner of address was less than professional however, my point was that I don't necessarily think there's anything wrong with that in context.

Anyway, maybe we have different ideas about how a doctor would 'normally' address a patient in a professional setting.

The only consolation I can offer, CF, is to say that sometimes the answer is just that simple. I guess it would have been more cathartic if the doc tested for some bizarre strain of a rare affliction and prescribed some killer meds and after the two weeks you just had that may have been more satisfying.

But these docs have seen it all and, despite the toll it has taken on both of you, its just run-of-the-mill toddler stuff and part of what's scary about that is how vulnerable parents are to even mild discomfort in children.

I remember going through that with the li'l Beesties and at first it was maddening - "Whaddya mean there's NOTHING wrong?!?!? FIND something wrong!!" Nope - the little ankle-biter is fine - just miserable.

When your understandable frustration returns to the tolerable zone you will look back and be glad it was nothing and not "something."

Probably the last southern one I came across.

I guess I didn't make myself very clear... I wasn't expecting her to prescribe anything at all, he was there at their request to be checked out for having a 2-week long fever, not for the sleeping. I was just surprised that she suggested something which (though realistically a viable solution, and not going to hurt him in the slightest) on the surface seems fairly irresponsible, and not what a doctor would normally say when they're constantly playing CYA to avoid lawsuits. It would be like if you were nervous going to the dentist and he said, "Oh, just drink a ton of brandy before you come, that'll help." Not traditional medical advice. Typically I err on the side of avoiding unnecessary medications in general, so I would have expected her to say something like, 'Yes, that's normal, just tough it out' not 'Sure, dope him up until he can't feel his toes, then he'll sleep.'

For the record, the amount of Benadryl that she promised would keep him asleep for a minimum of 5 hours only kept him asleep for 2 and a half. It was funny though, because even though he was awake he was swaying around like he was drunk. Funny in the way that you're not supposed to laugh at it but you just can't help yourself.

Sounds like last night went better then. How are you holding up? You post sounds fine, so you must be OK?

Oh sure, I can still manage to sneak in naps when he does during the day, and it's not like he was sleeping through the night before this anyway, so I'm used to it to a certain degree. :)

Sounds like the doctor is confident in your parenting skills, that you're not likely to over-do the meds to any dangerous degree, or anything silly like that.

Agreed.

I guess I just have different expectations of healthcare professionals, but I really was trying to be reassuring not critical. Good job I'm not a health care professional, huh? :lol: Sorry, clod.

Agreed, also. And, I replied just to say he's a real cute little feller, that one! I think one of the really hard things about being a parent would be when they don't feel well and you just want them to feel better so badly! I can tell you're a great parent, clod!

No apology necessary! You definitely were reassuring, I just didn't happen to need any reassurance. :) He's my first, but I have two older stepkids, and I'm pretty laid back about kids in general. I'm the parent who picks the toy right up off the restaurant floor and gives it back to him to chew on, figuring that it's building him a good immune system. :flycatch:

That makes the most sense to me. Assuming this Doc has met you before and the two of you have interacted somewhat. What I mean is that he/she may not give everyone the advice he/she gave you. He/she probably trusts your parenting skills more than he/she does other patients or parents. In that sense you should take it as a compliment.

My children's pediatrician is quite a character. He is an old-timer who no longer accepts patients, has had many medical articles published, and who is on the faculty of a nearby university. When my D11 was about 4-5, I took her in for a visit for an severe earache. He gave her a prescription for an antibiotic, some numbing drops and then handed me one last scrip. He solomnly told me that one was for me....so I could sleep when it knocked HER out :D . He's the bestest!!

Stormie

Works for my lot. :cool:

Clodfobble, may I make a suggestion about the little one's teething? When my three were teething, I would put some Anbesol on their gums and massage their gums with my thumb applying some upward pressure. I think it helped to cut the gums a little faster than slow growing teeth and they got longer relief from the pain. Their mother thought it was cruel, I thought it was wrong to let them hurt.

That has worked for us - our kids never get sick anymore.

Anbesol, I hadn't tried that. We have Orajel, and it seems to give him relief for all of about 5 minutes--which don't get me wrong, 5 minutes can be really helpful sometimes. I rub it in as much as I can when I apply it, but he already has two bottom teeth and he bites hard the instant my finger (or anything else) gets in there. I honestly think the bottom teeth are cutting his upper gums from the outside at least as much as the incoming ones are.

And welcome to the cellar!

Off topic, wrong thread, sue me.

A doctor dies and goes to central processing where there is an incrediably long line of souls waiting to be sorted onto elevators going UP or going DOWN.

Not acustomed to waiting in lines, he collars and angel walking by and complains: "I'm a doctor! I can't be kept waiting on line forever. I need to get to the front of this line, now."

The angel patiently listens to the man and says "I'm sure you are used to preferential treatment, but here we are all equal and there is no favoritism. Everyone has to wait in line."

At that moment a man in a white labcoat carrying a clipborad and stethoscope breezes past them to the front of the line. The doctor pitches a fit "You just told me we're all equal and no one gets special treatment and I just saw that doctor walk to the front of the line."

The angel says "That wasn't a doctor, that was God; he only thinks he's a doctor."

Our ped is from Germany or Austria, he is very cool and old fashioned, though not old at all.
Was very happy that we would not be having a circumcision, stated that he will not do them.

Yeah, all our docs were visibly relieved when we said no to circumcision. I forget who said it but it was something along the lines of "We don't get all that much to begin with, and then they wanna take some of it away?"

Our family secret for teething was a bit of whiskey rubbed on the gums, and a wee bit added to the bottle. Scots-Irish on my mother's side, but I suppose you could tell from the story.

The doctor told you about the benadryl thing because it works.

My dad said the same thing to us when the inch was teething. When my wife made this "you can't be serious" face, he said well what about some paragoric?

So I thought about this a little more, and wondered if her attitude was perhaps more professional than we realize from the surface? I think we're all generally in agreement that the underlying advice is good. If the doctor had been all formal and said "Well, mom, really these symptoms are to be expected and you could perhaps try some Benedryl to help him sleep if you feel that you need to", many parents in that situation might've been felt that they were either being given the brush off, or that the doctor was implying they could but shouldn't do this and so not heeded the advice. Perhaps the informal approach is professional because it makes you sit up and take good note of the advice and makes you more likely to follow it?