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08-03-2011, 09:47 PM | #1 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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Group therapy time
I have been living a completely untenable daydream for a good four days now. I mean really living it--thinking about it constantly, playing the story out years into the future in my mind, planning out a variety of imaginary conversations I would have in this imaginary series of events.
Before you go all, "Live the dream!" on me, let me reiterate that this daydream is not just unrealistic, it is completely and totally impossible. I understand that it's typical escapism, and not surprising for a person under stress... but knowing the origin hasn't stopped me from focusing on it yet. How unhealthy is this, and how long before I ought to be concerned with the obsession? |
08-04-2011, 12:01 AM | #2 |
a beautiful fool
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: 39.939705
Posts: 4,504
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How completely and totally impossible is it?
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There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool |
08-04-2011, 01:02 AM | #3 |
Junior Master Dwellar
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 2,728
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Hmm...is that really wrong? Does it affect your life?
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08-04-2011, 02:24 AM | #4 |
Radical Centrist
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Cottage of Prussia
Posts: 31,423
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LB's question is the whole thing.
As obsessive thoughts go, this is probably one of the better ones. There are the hoarders, the counters, the hand-washers... |
08-04-2011, 02:28 AM | #5 |
the big Cheese
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Switzerland
Posts: 390
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my thought is that if you are concerned about the obsession... aware that it is an obsession then isn't that the first step in getting control of it?
doesn't AA say that the first step to recovery is awareness and admitting to a problem? now then... onto the more important matters.......where did I leave that vodka? |
08-04-2011, 03:49 AM | #6 |
polaroid of perfection
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
Posts: 24,185
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Daydreams are just escapism.
Indulge yourself. I do. |
08-04-2011, 07:42 AM | #7 |
Makes some feel uncomfortable
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 10,346
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Clod, no matter what you do, Dana will NOT have sex with you. Oh wait, that's my obsession.
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"I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce |
08-04-2011, 09:14 AM | #8 |
Makes some feel uncomfortable
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 10,346
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Seriously, though, is your daydream harmful to others? If you're dreaming about what you would do with your powerball winnings, it's no big thing. If you're dreaming about running away to join the circus or shooting someone, you probably want to move on.
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"I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce |
08-04-2011, 09:41 AM | #9 | |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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Quote:
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08-04-2011, 09:58 AM | #10 |
Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 13,002
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Just reaching, buttttttttttt...
If it's a crush on another one or another way of life, it'll pass. And it's normal. Especially for someone with the challenges you face. |
08-04-2011, 11:11 AM | #11 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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Keep thinking about it.
Eventually, like everything else, it'll lose it's allure.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
08-04-2011, 11:42 AM | #12 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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Clod,
It is a choice and an indication. You can take small steps toward it and stop before the point of no return and see if it gets better or worse. You can also choose to put your mind and attention somewhere else. When it just won't go away then you need to look at what it is saying to you. Find a moment or two of quiet (I know, easier said than done) and listen to your heart, not your head. If it is the right thing, then the universe and FSM will underwrite your actions. If it is the wrong thing then you will be swimming upstream. Not sure if that makes sense or helps.
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
08-04-2011, 11:54 AM | #13 |
Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 13,002
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She was beautiful as southern skies
The night he met her She was married to someone He was doggedly determined that he would get her He was old, he was young From time to time he'd tip his heart But each time she withdrew Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance Everybody thinks it's true Well eventually the boy and the girl get married Sure enough they have a son And though they both were occupied With the child she carried Disagreements had begun And in a while they fell apart It wasn't hard to do Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance Everybody thinks it's true Two disappointed believers Two people playing the game Negotiations and love songs Are often mistaken for one and the same Now the man and the woman Remain in contact Let us say it's for the child With disagreements about the meaning Of a marriage contract Conversations hard and wild But from time to time He makes her laugh She cooks a meal or two Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance Everybody thinks it's true Everybody loves the sound of a train in the distance Everybody thinks it's true What is the point of this story What information pertains The thought that life could be better Is woven indelibly Into our hearts And our brains --Paul Simon |
08-04-2011, 12:02 PM | #14 |
polaroid of perfection
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
Posts: 24,185
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Philip Larkin
An Arundel Tomb (cropped) The stone finality They hardly meant has come to be Their final blazon, and to prove Our almost-instinct almost true: What will survive of us is love. It's not true of course. Love dies before beauty. And the survivor loves again, so it trascends death, if not in the way poets mean. I love to read about love, and cry about it, but it doesn't mean anything to me in real life. |
08-06-2011, 11:41 PM | #15 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
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I too have a recurring daydream of stepping into the past and then living this alternate reality where all is well and the worries of my "new normal" (as its called) are gone. Where I can choose the future I wanted without the restrictions and responsibilities that I now deal with 24/7. . .
It comes and goes for me now. I cannot think about it much - it depresses the hell outta me knowing it cannot happen. I try to focus on the little things, the positive things and just go from there.
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