Six was all we could afford ...

wolf · 05-10-2003, 02:20 PM

We all know the "infinite number of monkeys" statement ... well somebody managed to get a grant to do the research.

Of course it appears that they didn't have enough monkeys to get a really good sample.

(I wonder how the heck I can get a grant to test something ludicrus like this ... I think somebody already did the buttered cat experiment. There must be some cliche left ...)

Uryoces · 05-10-2003, 02:28 PM

My first response to a strange problem is to urinate on it, and bash it with rocks. Nothing strange there.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-10-2003, 04:42 PM

The headline at the top says "War In Iraq"
This was an obviously a story planted by the OSS to distract us from their covert actions in Sulawisi.
Everyone, except complete idiots, know Paignton Zoo is really a secret biological weapons research facility run in conjuncion with the Falon Gong.
So that proves conclusively that George W Bush has used his father's conections in the CIA to make you unconstintutionally pay personal income taxes.
While you're distracted with 1040 forms the KBG and Osama are using the evidence that crested macaques are primarily left handed to sell north slope oil leases to Isreal.
And don't even get me started on the North Korean conection to global warming or how SARS was caused by South African Diamond buyers.
WAKE UP AMERICA! There's monkey business going on.

richlevy · 05-10-2003, 08:16 PM

I ran the output through a few decryption algorithms and found the following embedded in the text.

The Plan:

1) Kill humans

2) Steal Bananas
3) Escape to France and wait for Caesar to lead revolt against humans.

Whit · 05-11-2003, 01:08 AM

     I thought that with the advent of the internet we pretty much knew what would happen if you gave a million monkeys a million computers...
     People are still pretty much animals. For those who think I'm being cynical, go to any search engine and type in the word "Porn". Oh, and make sure you check every link.

slang · 05-11-2003, 01:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Whit
Oh, and make sure you check every link.

OK.......Now what?

Whit · 05-11-2003, 01:21 AM

     Hey, having checked them all previously doesn't count!

xoxoxoBruce · 05-11-2003, 08:48 AM

Quote:

OK.......Now what?

Type in PRON and start all over.

Someone told me that.
I don't know what it means.
I don't remember who told me.
I know nothing.

Undertoad · 05-11-2003, 09:48 AM

pr0n - you need to switch the o to a zero.

This is a cultural thing unique to the web: it developed as a way to get around filters and such, and lives on because it was so bizarre and interesting as to stick in people's heads.

Similar to "All your base"

arz · 05-12-2003, 06:15 PM

Getting monkeys and giving them computers was not necessary. We already know what happens when a million monkeys gain access to computers and get on line- it's called Usenet.

Bitman · 05-14-2003, 09:54 PM

This was stupid. There was only one computer, so the monkeys naturally fought over it. There should have been six. Then, the number of letters the monkeys were using started increasing, and just as the monkeys got interested, they terminated the experiment. Most importantly, 6 monkeys is roughly 0% of infinity, so this experiment was completely useless.

wolf · 05-15-2003, 01:07 AM

No it's not. The researchers can now apply for additional funding to refine their hypothesis and try again.

Give them time.

Couple more iterations and they'll have maybe enough monkeys to generate dirty limericks. (which I think monkeys would like more than shakespeare anyway).

Heck, all they really have to do is check the basement at Harlequin, Inc. They've had monkeys typing there for years.

05-10-2003, 02:20 PM	#1
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Six was all we could afford ... We all know the "infinite number of monkeys" statement ... well somebody managed to get a grant to do the research. Of course it appears that they didn't have enough monkeys to get a really good sample. (I wonder how the heck I can get a grant to test something ludicrus like this ... I think somebody already did the buttered cat experiment. There must be some cliche left ...) __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

05-10-2003, 02:28 PM	#2
Uryoces 2nd Covenant, yo Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Pugetropolis Posts: 583	My first response to a strange problem is to urinate on it, and bash it with rocks. Nothing strange there. __________________ The party's over ... the drink ... and the luck ... ran out.

05-10-2003, 04:42 PM	#3
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	The headline at the top says "War In Iraq" This was an obviously a story planted by the OSS to distract us from their covert actions in Sulawisi. Everyone, except complete idiots, know Paignton Zoo is really a secret biological weapons research facility run in conjuncion with the Falon Gong. So that proves conclusively that George W Bush has used his father's conections in the CIA to make you unconstintutionally pay personal income taxes. While you're distracted with 1040 forms the KBG and Osama are using the evidence that crested macaques are primarily left handed to sell north slope oil leases to Isreal. And don't even get me started on the North Korean conection to global warming or how SARS was caused by South African Diamond buyers. WAKE UP AMERICA! There's monkey business going on. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. Last edited by xoxoxoBruce; 05-10-2003 at 04:45 PM.

05-10-2003, 08:16 PM	#4
richlevy King Of Wishful Thinking Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Philadelphia Suburbs Posts: 6,669	I ran the output through a few decryption algorithms and found the following embedded in the text. The Plan: 1) Kill humans 2) Steal Bananas 3) Escape to France and wait for Caesar to lead revolt against humans. __________________ Exercise your rights and remember your obligations - VOTE! I have always believed that hope is that stubborn thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us so long as we have the courage to keep reaching, to keep working, to keep fighting. -- Barack Hussein Obama

05-11-2003, 01:08 AM	#5
Whit Umm ... yeah. Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Arkansas, USA Posts: 949	I thought that with the advent of the internet we pretty much knew what would happen if you gave a million monkeys a million computers...      People are still pretty much animals. For those who think I'm being cynical, go to any search engine and type in the word "Porn". Oh, and make sure you check every link. __________________ A friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body.

05-11-2003, 01:21 AM	#7
Whit Umm ... yeah. Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Arkansas, USA Posts: 949	Hey, having checked them all previously doesn't count! __________________ A friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body.

05-11-2003, 09:48 AM	#9
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	pr0n - you need to switch the o to a zero. This is a cultural thing unique to the web: it developed as a way to get around filters and such, and lives on because it was so bizarre and interesting as to stick in people's heads. Similar to "All your base"

05-12-2003, 06:15 PM	#10
arz Hand-of-Kindness Extender Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: So Cal Posts: 137	Getting monkeys and giving them computers was not necessary. We already know what happens when a million monkeys gain access to computers and get on line- it's called Usenet.

05-14-2003, 09:54 PM	#11
Bitman cellar smellar Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: californy, baby! Posts: 403	This was stupid. There was only one computer, so the monkeys naturally fought over it. There should have been six. Then, the number of letters the monkeys were using started increasing, and just as the monkeys got interested, they terminated the experiment. Most importantly, 6 monkeys is roughly 0% of infinity, so this experiment was completely useless.

05-15-2003, 01:07 AM	#12
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	No it's not. The researchers can now apply for additional funding to refine their hypothesis and try again. Give them time. Couple more iterations and they'll have maybe enough monkeys to generate dirty limericks. (which I think monkeys would like more than shakespeare anyway). Heck, all they really have to do is check the basement at Harlequin, Inc. They've had monkeys typing there for years. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

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