The Road to the Hereafter

[Elspode]

It has finally happened. I've run out of superlatives. I don't have a sufficient grasp of the English language to keep posting these little post-mortem tributes to the pop-culture icons of my youth. I thought I was pretty much tapped out when I found myself having to really stretch to adequately express my admiration after the passing of Katharine Hepburn - but today, a true giant has crossed over, so I'm going to give it the good old should-have-gone-to-college try.

Bob Hope was without a doubt among the very, very few performers who managed to reach the most rarified heights of the American entertainment firmament, and he was certainly amongst those most worthy of that adulation. No one was ever funnier, no one was ever more versatile, more human, more patriotic or more dedicated. He sang, he danced, he split our sides. The profile of his nose was more famous than Hitchcock's formidably familiar TV-logo profile. His participation in any commercial promotion ensured that the commodity being hawked would become synonymous with his winning demeanor. His variety shows were among the most reliable draws on television for decades. The "Road" pictures he made with the equally grand Bing Crosby were often hysterical, and always diverting. He hosted the Academy Awards for so long that it was almost unthinkable when finally Bob stepped aside to be replaced. Who could possibly be as funny as he when lamenting the lack of an Oscar? It is because of Bob Hope that award shows ever became watchable in the first place. And, above all of that, there have also been damn few men who could lampoon fifty years worth of sitting presidents on one day, then play golf with them the next.

Lacking enough verbal skill to go on stating the obvious, I will simply relate this brief memory:

I was fortunate enough to have been able to see Bob Hope in person some twenty years back at a benefit show in Kemper Arena (which featured the sublime Patti Page as the opening act). Bob acted as both host and main act. He did an hour of classic Hope comedy, and filled the arena with laughs, moans, groans and absolute gales of applause. He also did a couple of songs with Ms. Page. It was, I think, the longest standing ovation I had ever seen anyone receive when the evening ended. The adulation was obviously directed at Bob, but he shared it more than graciously with Ms. Page. The whole time I sat through this incredibly special show, I remember thinking how long Bob had been around, how much he had given to his craft and his country. I thought about how often I'd stayed up late watching one of his silly movies, laughing my ass off. I thought of the USO shows he'd performed across four decades, the countless holiday specials, the endless golf jokes. Most of all, I remember thinking how truly, deeply grateful I was to have been able, for a short while and from a considerable distance, to occupy the same space as a true, undisputed legend of the performing arts.

Bob made countless people laugh and forget their troubles, if only for a short while. I believe that is a worthwhile calling, and a life well-spent. And yes, I *will* end this with an incredibly obvious cliche...

Bob - thanks for the memories.