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Old 06-11-2006, 01:54 AM   #1
Undertoad
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6/11/2006: Condom from 1640



According to Ananova, what we have here is the world's oldest condom, on display in an Austrian museum. No word on why they speculate that this is the oldest, but they say it's reusable (eww!), made of pig intestine, (ewwwwwww!) and comes (ha ha) with an owner's manual written in Latin.

The article says the manual suggests that the condom user should "immerse the condom in warm milk prior to its use to avoid diseases." Did they understand the whole mechanism of disease in 1640? And if you soaked it in warm milk, what's the need for the woman? This thing looks like it has all the sensitivity of tree bark, and reminds us that there are many advantages to advances in technology.
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Old 06-11-2006, 03:26 AM   #2
DucksNuts
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I'm sorry, but I dont think I could've gotten past the thought of anything belonging to a pig being near my girlie bits....what a mood killer!!
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Old 06-11-2006, 06:21 AM   #3
chrisinhouston
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Latin instructions, huh?

loco vestri Penis hic (Put your penis here)

I haven't had a need for condoms recently as I am in a second marriage and we are both 50+ in age but aren't there several brands of "natural" condoms that use lamb membranes still on the market?
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Old 06-11-2006, 07:12 AM   #4
milkfish
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Latin instructions: Hic jacet vir. Festina lente.

That Tirolean County Museum sounds like a happening place. How about getting someone on the Cellar to report on the other 249 sex-related items on display?
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Old 06-11-2006, 07:51 AM   #5
footfootfoot
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisinhouston
Latin instructions, huh?

loco vestri Penis hic (Put your penis here)

I haven't had a need for condoms recently as I am in a second marriage and we are both 50+ in age but aren't there several brands of "natural" condoms that use lamb membranes still on the market?
The lamb condoms are amazingly like riding bareback in more ways than one. They also freely allow most viruses to pass through the membrane along with all the sensation.

Rubber does a much better job of insulation, in all regards.
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Old 06-11-2006, 08:49 AM   #6
xoxoxoBruce
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DucksNuts
I'm sorry, but I dont think I could've gotten past the thought of anything belonging to a pig being near my girlie bits....what a mood killer!!
So you've never sobered up and realized he was a pig, huh?
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Old 06-11-2006, 12:30 PM   #7
Perry Winkle
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I guess it's better than getting the French Pox.
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Old 06-11-2006, 05:21 PM   #8
DucksNuts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce
So you've never sobered up and realized he was a pig, huh?
Yeah, but, the deed was already done then...I wasnt all in the mood, when out comes the pig guts (would be kinda bulky in the wallet??) and I start thinking..."ohhhhh no, he's gonna put that in there, then try and put that in there????"

Hell, it took me 3 years to realise the Ex was a pig...I must be a slow learner.
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Old 06-12-2006, 01:27 PM   #9
Spexxvet
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It looks like it ties on - imagine it getting knotted and stuck on. Or better yet, your partner coming close with a pair of scissors "I'll cut it off".
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Old 06-12-2006, 02:10 PM   #10
KinkyVixen
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It'd probably be ok if she wasn't Lorena Bobbitt.
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Old 06-19-2006, 01:43 PM   #11
mitheral
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisinhouston
Latin instructions, huh?

loco vestri Penis hic (Put your penis here)

I haven't had a need for condoms recently as I am in a second marriage and we are both 50+ in age but aren't there several brands of "natural" condoms that use lamb membranes still on the market?
"So tell me, how is using a sheep condom different than fucking one? Nope, sorry you can't screw a sheep, but if you kill it, and remove everything but the large intestine, that's ok. Riiight.''
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Old 06-19-2006, 07:49 PM   #12
xoxoxoBruce
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It's the old, using for good vs using for evil, the eternal conundrum.
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