E-mail Idiots on Parade

[elSicomoro]

I'm going to start posting some of the witty spam that comes along my way. Feel free to post your own.

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From: (name)
Tel: (number).

Attn: PRESIDENT / DIRECTOR

CONFIDENTIAL

Dear Sir,

I am (name) the only daughter of late former Director of finance,(name) Sierra-Leone diamond and mining corporation. I must confess my agitation is real, and my words is
my bond, in this proposal. My late father diverted this money meant for purchase of ammunition, for my country, during the peak of disastrous civil war in my country, now he has
deposited the money with (bank and city), where I am
residing under political asylum with my mother (name) and younger brother.

Now the war in my country is over with the help of ECOMOG soldiers, the present government of Sierra Leone has revoked the passport of all officers who served under the former regime and now ask countries to expel such person at the same time freeze their account and confiscate their asset, it is on this note
that I am contacting you, all I needed from you is to furnish me with your bank particulars:

1) Account name
2) Account number
3) Bank address, telephone and fax number
For you to assist me transfer this money in your private bank account, the said amount is (Twenty seven Million Dollars) $27 Million.
I am compensating you with 15 % of the total money amount, now all my hope is banked on you and I really wants to invest this money in your country, were their is stability of Government, political and economic welfare.

Honestly I want you to believe that this transaction is real and never a joke. My late father (name) gave me the photocopies of the certificate of deposit issued to me by (bank) on the date of deposit, for you to be clarify because, I do not expose my self to anybody I see, I believe that you are able to keep this transaction secret for me because this money is
the hope of our life, it is important.

Please call me immediately after you must have gone through my message fill free and make it urgent. That is the reason why I offered you 15 % of the total money amount, and in case of any other necessary expenses you might incur during this transaction.

N.B Try and negotiate for us some profitable blue chip investment opportunities which is risky free which I can invest with this money when it is transferred to your account, personally I am interested in estate management and hotel business, please advise me.

Call me back immediately you receive this message for more explanation.And promisse me my younger brother and our mother to be a father considering our situation and not to betray us.

Thanks and God bless
Best regards

(name) TEL: (number).
NB: my late father used my brother the only son as the beneficiary / next of kin on the day of deposit and also told me I need a foreign assistance of a foreigner with a legitimate bank Account abroad who will stand as co-beneficiary and partner abroad.
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Sycamore sez: "Look stupid ass, if you're going to send me spam like this, at least learn how to write in decent English."