Bouncer Stories

[ZenGum]

As recently mentioned in the post whore thread, bouncers are good for an interesting anecdote. (Check the PW thread for an explanation of how a bouncer got the nickname "Princess").

Anyway, the same guy told me many a tale of bouncer adventures. I won't repeat the "fight" stories, the only really notable one was the 8 bouncers Vs 20 angry locals at Cabulture, Qld, and I don't recall all the details. (The bouncers won).

A better story was how he learned to refuse entry to drunk patrons. As a young lout, he'd just say "nah" and hope for a fight. As he got older he found that fighting led to too much paperwork and that confusing them is easier and more fun.

Imagine the following conversation:

Bouncer: Sorry, mate, not tonight.
Drunk: Wha? Why not?
B: It's your sausages, mate.
D: What???
B: Your sausages.
D: What sausages?
B: [points to patron's shoes] Your sausages. You can't come in with those sausages on.
D: Wha??
B: Sorry, mate, can't let you in with those sausages on.
D: ...... ?

Eventually the drunk punter gives up and wanders off.



Got any bouncer stories?