Divorce

[kgg]

First of all, none of us know her and everyone is turning her into a villian. She may well just want to talk. And frankly, we do not know anything about Deuce either except what he is posting. For all we know, they are faults on both sides. Let them work it out themselves.

[Sundae]

Originally Posted by kgg

First of all, none of us know her and everyone is turning her into a villian. She may well just want to talk. And frankly, we do not know anything about Deuce either except what he is posting. For all we know, they are faults on both sides. Let them work it out themselves.

To start with I read this with the same thought in mind. I left my husband (we didn't have children) and therefore won't automatically condemn the person leaving the relationship, even if they break the other person's heart.

However I think we have enough evidence for the position taken by Dwellars. I don't think she has necessarily been made out to be the villain - she is simply the one who has involved the law and put Deuce in a situation where he has to fight. She has physically removed their son and set something in place to deny him access to their joint property. I don't get the feeling she is a woman running scared, rather a woman who wants a man removed from her life. Her follow-up phone call also suggests she does not perceive him as dangerous.

Even Cicero, who advocates "leaving her stupid ass" qualifies it by saying the advice only counts if the restraining order was unnecessary.

I'm sure Deuce's wife feels her actions are justified and her friends probably think he is very much the villain of the piece. After all, she has the law on her side. Personally I think it's sad that it had to escalate to this and she wasn't able to move into a friend or relative's house and continue with counselling before getting on the financially draining path of legal interference. Who loses out in the end? Who would the money usually be spent on? It's a truism that the children always suffer when a relationship breaks down.

[wolf]

Originally Posted by kgg

First of all, none of us know her and everyone is turning her into a villian. She may well just want to talk. And frankly, we do not know anything about Deuce either except what he is posting. For all we know, they are faults on both sides. Let them work it out themselves.

They have been not talking for several months now. If there is any further talking to be done, it needs to be done by the lawyers.

[Cicero]

Originally Posted by kgg

First of all, none of us know her and everyone is turning her into a villian. She may well just want to talk. And frankly, we do not know anything about Deuce either except what he is posting. For all we know, they are faults on both sides. Let them work it out themselves.

I think you might have been responding to my post...and I think I left it open enough with my responses. Fact is...she made sure that it is illegal for them to talk, no matter what her intentions were at that time. No blame. Just the truth. I also did not blame her if the fault was his. I did not blame him if the fault was his. I blamed her if she perjured herself- if she was not in harm's way and stated that she was a victim. I do not know...but it is a common tactic. I saw this game play out once in my personal life and the kid suffered the most. He was almost killed by the heavy handed game playing of the adults involved. It turned out really, really badly.

Follow the attorney's advice to every letter and everything else will work itself out. Don't take any chances Deuce.

[yesman065]

Originally Posted by Cicero

Follow the attorney's advice to every letter and everything else will work itself out. Don't take any chances Deuce.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^See above ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[Cicero]

Originally Posted by yesman065

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^See above ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Is that to me or to Deuce?

[yesman065]

Originally Posted by Cicero

As that to me or to Deuce?

To Deuce. Its great advice. That and the old adage - hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.