50%...survey says!

infinite monkey · 05-24-2011, 12:12 PM

Make up your own statistics here.

50% of half of the Americans who were asked independently by an idependent organization (of which roughly 56% were female) cannot determine 30% of half of their ass from a hole in the ground. Furthermore, 43% of the people polled did not recognize 89% of the words and another 5% said they gave their ass to benefit 60% of the people who were affected by the solid increase in storms last year...a whopping 98% elevation from the previous 43 years. All but 31% of the respondents were sixth day adventists, which may account for the .05% decrease of affirmative responses from respondents for the same percentage of time the previous decade.

Spexxvet · 05-24-2011, 12:25 PM

HungLikeJesus · 05-24-2011, 09:31 PM

Any time that you shake hands with someone, there is a 23% chance that they have picked their nose within the previous four minutes.

monster · 05-24-2011, 09:41 PM

there is a 10% chance that any bank bill over $10 you touch has been used to sniff cocaine, but a 23% chance that any $10 or less had been up a sex-worker's hoo-haa.

ZenGum · 05-25-2011, 02:23 AM

22% of people surveyed told me to sod off.

monster · 05-25-2011, 06:49 PM

99% of all rain in the world fell in Ann Arbor today. This proves that George Bush is a twat.

DanaC · 05-25-2011, 06:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

99% of all rain in the world fell in Ann Arbor today. This proves that George Bush is a twat.

That right there is a sig.

monster · 05-25-2011, 07:02 PM

sexobon · 05-25-2011, 07:34 PM

50% of those responding to polls say that a 50% vote in any given poll option does not represent half; rather, it represents the other half which is intrinsically less meaningful.

wolf · 05-25-2011, 07:45 PM

Hey! I know my ass from a hole in the ground, but I sometimes have difficulty finding it with both hands and a flashlight ...

TheMercenary · 05-25-2011, 09:21 PM

50% of all the people you shake hands with will pass potentially infectious viruses or bacteria directly to your hand which you will subsequently infect yourself with within 3 minutes of touching the vector.... wash your hands fools.

plthijinx · 05-25-2011, 09:43 PM

i'm convinced that 75% of houstonians learned how to drive at the go kart track.

(sad side note: it really does happen. full grown ppl who don't know how to drive are brought here to learn how to drive before their tests. *sigh*)

monster · 05-25-2011, 10:02 PM

50% of dwellars actually read most of the posts in a thread before replying. Only 25% of those actually procees what they read. 10% of those "get it", but 4% of those are pathological assholes. So If you start a thread in th Cellar, you have a 3.14% chance of a coherant response. But you have a 66.6% chance of being contradicted.

bluecuracao · 05-25-2011, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

there is a 10% chance that any bank bill over $10 you touch has been used to sniff cocaine, but a 23% chance that any $10 or less had been up a sex-worker's hoo-haa.

I have actually received change bills from our local bodega that smell like hoohaa. Ugh.

TheMercenary · 05-25-2011, 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

50% of dwellars actually read most of the posts in a thread before replying.

I think the number is actually quite a bit smaller.

05-24-2011, 12:12 PM	#1
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	50%...survey says! Make up your own statistics here. 50% of half of the Americans who were asked independently by an idependent organization (of which roughly 56% were female) cannot determine 30% of half of their ass from a hole in the ground. Furthermore, 43% of the people polled did not recognize 89% of the words and another 5% said they gave their ass to benefit 60% of the people who were affected by the solid increase in storms last year...a whopping 98% elevation from the previous 43 years. All but 31% of the respondents were sixth day adventists, which may account for the .05% decrease of affirmative responses from respondents for the same percentage of time the previous decade.

05-24-2011, 12:25 PM	#2
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	__________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

05-24-2011, 09:31 PM	#3
HungLikeJesus Only looks like a disaster tourist Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: above 7,000 feet Posts: 7,208	Any time that you shake hands with someone, there is a 23% chance that they have picked their nose within the previous four minutes. __________________ Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.

05-24-2011, 09:41 PM	#4
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	there is a 10% chance that any bank bill over $10 you touch has been used to sniff cocaine, but a 23% chance that any $10 or less had been up a sex-worker's hoo-haa. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-25-2011, 02:23 AM	#5
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	22% of people surveyed told me to sod off. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

05-25-2011, 06:49 PM	#6
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	99% of all rain in the world fell in Ann Arbor today. This proves that George Bush is a twat. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-25-2011, 07:02 PM	#8
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	__________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-25-2011, 07:34 PM	#9
sexobon I love it when a plan comes together. Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 9,793	50% of those responding to polls say that a 50% vote in any given poll option does not represent half; rather, it represents the *other* half which is intrinsically less meaningful.

05-25-2011, 07:45 PM	#10
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Hey! I know my ass from a hole in the ground, but I sometimes have difficulty finding it with both hands and a flashlight ... __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

05-25-2011, 09:21 PM	#11
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	50% of all the people you shake hands with will pass potentially infectious viruses or bacteria directly to your hand which you will subsequently infect yourself with within 3 minutes of touching the vector.... wash your hands fools. __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!

05-25-2011, 09:43 PM	#12
plthijinx Master Dwellar Join Date: Aug 2003 Posts: 4,197	i'm convinced that 75% of houstonians learned how to drive at the go kart track. (sad side note: it really does happen. full grown ppl who don't know how to drive are brought here to learn how to drive before their tests. sigh) __________________ For your dreams to come true, you must first have a dream.

05-25-2011, 10:02 PM	#13
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	50% of dwellars actually read most of the posts in a thread before replying. Only 25% of those actually procees what they read. 10% of those "get it", but 4% of those are pathological assholes. So If you start a thread in th Cellar, you have a 3.14% chance of a coherant response. But you have a 66.6% chance of being contradicted. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

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